Why do I lose my erection with my girlfriend?

Hey sorry to be graphic in terms of details but I'm concerned about my girlfriend and our relationship.

My girlfriend is extremely gorgeous and amazing in bed, I love her to death, but we rarely have the moment to do anything sexual with each other.

So lately I started to masturbate again, but the past 3 days I did , last night we have a moment to do something but I couldn't keep it up. It kept going soft and she looked really sad. I'm still very attracted to her and wonder why I couldn't keep going.

What 's the problem and what can I say to her to cheer up, now she thinks I find her "fat" or "unattractive".


Most Helpful Girl

  • First, it happens, a lot more than guys let on about. It's not something to stress out about. You might have just been preoccupied with stuff from work, family drama, your sports team, the Middle East, etc. You may never understand why it happened. That's just kind of how it goes. Try to shrug it off and move on. (If it keeps happening, like for weeks, go see a doctor. Mostly guys have erection problems because of psychological blips, but rarely it is because of an underlying health condition.)

    The best way to make her feel better is to show that you find her attractive. Just because YOU can't really enjoy yourself doesn't mean you can't make her feel amazing. Tell her the night is all about her - have it all be foreplay (long make-out session, lots of fingering, give her oral, take a bath together, bring food - whatever you think she'll like). She will probably love all the attention, and she won't be doubting herself while you're showering her with affection. Sex is great for women, but we like lots of other things too.

    If you ever have problems "performing" in the future, you should immediately start doing this to avoid having an upset girlfriend. She honestly might not even notice what's going on with you.


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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 2

  • It is fear.

    Possibly performance fear or pretty woman syndrome. Something about her or you is turning you off.

    If you have a goal in sex to get off, change your goal to having fun or being close.

    Tell your girl a story. Tell her you have a dream of her coming on to you and when you see her you are hard and ready, then you close your eyes for a second and when you looked at her again all you saw a 4 legged woman with hairs growing out of her mouth.

    This will break the ice and get you off the hook. Everything is mental.

    Good luck,

  • it happened to me when I was younger I think its to do with over thinking about it.

    you just have to try and not worry/think about it (easier said than done I know)

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