My boyfriend wants to have anal sex but I'm scared. What should I expect?

My boyfriend started out hinting at it and has now asked me if I will let him. I am so scared as I have tried a few times before (no lube) and it hurt like hell. Even with lube, will it still hurt bad? I can't help but think it has to be so much worse than the first time having sex vaginally which was painful too. Also, will it make me fart or poop? Will his penis be covered in feces? How would a guy respond to that? I know he loves me very much but that would be so embarrassing! Would it cause him to be disgusted and want to break up? He has stuck his finger in before...just the tip...that felt good.
0 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • "Even with lube, will it still hurt bad? I can't help but think it has to be so much worse than the first time having sex vaginally which was painful too. "

    If he goes slow, and you use lube, it will still hurt a little at first. That apparently doesn't change, according to my girlfriend. It always hurts a little when you start. She still enjoys it, for some reason.

    "Also, will it make me fart or poop?"

    No.

    "Will his penis be covered in feces?"

    Not unless you're actively needing to sh*t when you start. I've had a little on my junk before, but not much, and that's rare.

    "How would a guy respond to that? I know he loves me very much but that would be so embarrassing! Would it cause him to be disgusted and want to break up?"

    No, it's really not a big deal.

    A few things: First, it helps (you) to have some alcohol beforehand. Get a buzz, and it'll help you relax. Second, it does NOT help for your boyfriend to have alcohol. His judgement will be slightly skewed, and he might go too hard or fast at first, and that ruins everything. You need to go slow to start. And I mean REALLY slow. It helps a LOT to have some anal play beforehand, fingers and tongue. If he's not okay with putting his mouth on it, he probably shouldn't be putting his d*** in it.

    Make sure he knows that he needs to go SLOW. I can't emphasize that enough. Tell him that he's got one shot at this, and if he f***s it up, he's not getting anal again. That being said, you need to know that it's going to hurt a little throughout the entire thing. My girlfriend enjoys the feeling of being filled, and she enjoys the slight pain that goes along with the pleasure (and according to her, there's definitely pleasure). But If you're not into that at all, anal might not be the best thing for you.

    • It also helps if you orgasm beforehand. Orgasm releases endorphins, and that will help reduce the pain a little when you start with the anal.

  • It's gonna hurt no matter what but I'm sure it hurt pretty badly when you lost your virginity. My current girlfriend doesn't do much anal but she's constantly horny. A couple years ago I was with a girl who didn't seem to enjoy sex that much until one day she was riding me and I just stuck my finger up her butt. I stayed with her for a while because she was one of the few girls down for anal and she loved it. It will get less painful each time you do it, although I can't give you one hundred percent certainty because I have never been on the receiving end. You shouldn't poop or fart but it's definitely possible...I've had an instance where it got a little messy. Just keep your diet low on fiber and all foods for that matter the day before. Also make sure you shower before and give a little TLC to your bum. Goodluck!

Most Helpful Girls

  • don't do it unless you're comfortable if you're uncomfortable you'll tense up and it will hurt, use some lube this is a must if you want to do it without a lot of pain. I always find the insertion a little uncomfortable he has to get passed the second sphincter which you don't really have any control over, but once inside the feeling is amazing. There's always the chance that some feces might be down there if you're concerned you can give yourself an enima before hand

  • With lube and going slowly anal is not so painful. Vaginal first time was 10 times more painful for me

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 7
  • Play just the tip. Except this time it's the tip of his d*** not his finger.

    But here's the trick of it sally: it's never just the tip.

  • If you don't want to then don't.

    First it is anal against your desires, next it is pulling it out and you licking him clean. A woman will do anything.

    If you think it will hurt, it will. If you do not respect yourself, he does not even have to try. If you care more about a man degrading you, than you care about a man loving you. What do you have to offer a man who is correct for you?

  • Your poop is gonna fall out for like a day afterwards.

  • Scared or not, do what he wants!

    It's your duty to satisfy him so just bend over and let him have some fun. You'd already let his finger inside you, so stop being dramatic about it.

  • Use the toilet like an hour before,

    Make sure you wash up properly,

    Anus not meant to stretch like the vagina so go extremely slow.

  • Just say no until you yourself become curious of it. There are also allot of guides online from doctors of how to have safe and pleasurable anal sex. Girlsaskguys.com is not the best place for this information.

    Continue playing around with fingers since that felt good.

  • If you don't feel comfortable then don't do it. Try an entire finger first before going further see how you like it.