My boyfriend is a virgin and I'm not, and I'm getting sexually frustrated... help?

[Anonymous]

I've been with my guy for almost 6 months, and it had been a couple months before that since I broke up with the last guy I dated (who I lost my virginity to). I've known since about date #2 that he's a virgin, and he told me that he thinks I'm the one for life and he wants to lose it to me. I've told him over and over that we can take it as slow as he needs to, and not rush into it, but it's frustrating, because he keeps telling me, "oh yeah, in a few weeks I'll be ready", or "I'll be ready by Halloween" and stuff like that, then things happen or he just chickens out. I don't care if he isn't ready yet, but it's frustrating to me mentally and sexually that he keeps telling me he'll be ready and then he isn't. I have a really high sex drive, and making out might do it for him, but it doesn't do anything for me. I've talked to him about it some, but I don't think he gets it, and I definitely don't want to seem like I'm pressuring him. Any advice at all? (Besides having an open relationship... I do NOT want to do that.)

[marshnewb]

Lol it might just be time to nut up or shut up. Just go all out. Plan a romantic date, get him back to somewhere quiet, dark, and alone, and just be naughty as hell. Make some pushes. Tell him you need him and what you want. I don't know a guy alive that wouldn't be way too horny to deny that. He will thank you later ;)

[kheserthorpe]

Yeah. Stop lying to him. I know in theory you'd like to be fine with no sex, but you're not.

Is he waiting because he's not sure enough about the relationship, or because he's not ready to have sex at his age, period, or because he's worried about pregnancy?

[Asker]

He's worried that he's not going to be good enough. Plus, he has severe anxiety, and it kicks in when he has sensory overload... it happens nearly every time we even make out, so he's nervous that it will get even worse when we get to the real thing.

[kheserthorpe]

Avoiding it will make it worse. If that's the case, he needs to slloooooowwwwly move forward. Tell him to get a grip. He's going to suck. The sooner he starts sucking on a regular basis, the closer he'll be to be getting good. But tell him the good news is you're so damn horny and so attracted to him that a few seconds of sex sounds -amazing- right now.

[Asker]

Haha all of that stuff is actually exactly what I keep telling him.

[martyfellow]

Ever think of just seducing him? A little alcohol, maybe, a little mood music..presto, you're both happy!

[taster]

Put your hand on his zipper/crotch and see what he does...if he is having trouble relaxing then maybe apply some (but not too much) alcohol?

[Asker]

He has no trouble getting turned on haha. It just seems like every time we make plans for him to come over to my apartment for the night, something comes up and he either isn't able to stay the night (so he doesn't want to do anything big) or he can't come over at all. The only time he's at all ready to do anything, is on nights that I have work the next morning, so nothing can happen.

[taster]

That is not normal...an animal in rut focuses only on sex...maybe schedule a night for him to stay? but that is intimidating to males and will pressure him..spontaneous is much better...at least for most males...o.O

[Anonymous]

Get a different guy.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you need to molest him and take control. Get him so turned out and comfortable it doesn't matter. Start off with blow jobs. Tell him to shut up and lay there.

[MikeK]

Great!