Are any women attracted to chubby guys?

[Anonymous]

There's a wide variety of p*rnography for men out there, much of it dedicated to women of specific body types and sizes. It ranges from petite to body-builder, super-skinny to quite large women. It's apparent then, that there are men attracted to just about any type of woman, even if they do not come anywhere near what is normally considered "beautiful." Porn meant for women is not as prevalent and much less varied due to that, but I've seen first hand that some women also find non-traditionally "beautiful" men to be attractive. I've heard women say they like really muscular guys, small skinny guys and those who aren't skinny or muscular but still toned. I've never heard, though, of a woman who specifically liked chubby or fat men. I mean, if men have such a variety of attractions, it stands to reason that women do too. But the large majority of large men I know either date/married large women or they grew fatter after they married. Even the large women that date/marry the large guys usually didn't get interested in the large men for their bodies, but just didn't mind it as much. They fell for the man and his body is just something to get used to or grow to love. Are there no women out there, then who actually like chubby/large men's bodies? I could find a girlfriend who can look past my weight after she got to know me and be with me DESPITE my size, but can I not find a girl who not only doesn't see my size as a thing to get past, but also a thing she loves about me?

[Anonymous]

With men and women, face shape and structure plays a BIG role in attraction. Studies have shown that large eyes, rounded chins, and full lips are associated with less dominant characteristics in men. A strong jawline and thinner lips appears more dominant.

For instance, lets take a look at the MAN of all men (doubt we will find too many that will disagree on this), Clint Eastwood back in the day. Clint Eastwood undoubtedly came off as manly as a man could come off. But was it just his attitude and demeanor?

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First, look at his eyes. Small, thin, with a well defined brow line. Cheeks are also well defined and thin. He has thin lips and a relatively strong jawline. Not quite as strong as say, Channing Tatum, but strong enough where his overall facial appearance is very masculine. But what does that have to do with weight?

Well a notable example would be Jonah Hill. Easy to reference at least.

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The most noticeable difference in his face is the change in his jawline due to a loss of weight. And I'm not talking about the structure of his jawline changing, I'm talking about the outer shape it takes that people can see. Overweight his jawline isn't defined at all. The extra weight basically makes his face very round and as a result, it takes away that masculine look. The extra weight really takes away the defined masculine facial features/shape of a man, and as a result he won't be nearly as physically attractive. It's my belief that the jawline is one of the most critical areas of the face that determine the level of attraction. Along with that, eye shape/size/along with the brow then cheek bone structure, followed by lips, and then a proportional sized nose.

It's not just men though, its women too. But instead of looking for features of masculinity, we're looking for features that are more feminine. The jawline is a bit different, but key concepts still apply.

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Olivia Munn has a well defined jawline. You could cover the top half of that picture so that just the jawline and lips were showing then ask a guy "based on what you see here, do you think this person is likely or unlikely to have an attractive face?" and I doubt there would be many guys saying unlikely. The jawline set the tone for the rest of her face. When you add too much weight into the picture, the jawline no longer holds that definition and the face loses those feminine features. The cheeks and the jawline work together, and those are the two most effected by weight gain.

I think facial features of people overweight is the biggest problem when it comes to their level of attractiveness to the opposite sex.

[Asker]

Nothing you said is wrong and that indeed describes how our society tends to see and judge beauty. But my question wasn't about why most people don't find big men attractive. My point was that there are people who find things beautiful that are not normally seen as such. There are men who like old women, hairy women, and large women, despite how those things clearly break the norm of what is considered beautiful. My question was are there also women who are attracted to big men despite the norm.

[Opinion Owner]

I think anybody that is attracted to something that is not the natural form/state of a person, they probably have some issues. The reasons listed above boil down to biological imperative. Unspoken things passed down in our very genetics as a result of hundreds of thousands of years of natural selection and such. So something that goes in the face of that should be unattractive. If the person finds that trait specifically attractive it says something went haywire. That goes for both men an women.

[Opinion Owner]

But there's no reason biologically speaking that there isn't some small subsection of the population of women that are attracted to fat men. Or bald men. Or scrawny men. Or any other characteristic you can think of. There's enough people on this planet that every possible scenario that would effect that sort of thing has played out many times over. That's why they say there's somebody for everybody.

[Asker]

Well that just means you're judging anyone who doesn't like the classical beauty concept of the opposite sex to being somehow having issues. So anyone who is gay, who likes small breast and a petite frame or who likes slight men without much muscle has some sort of problem for you? I take offense to that. The fact that one trait may be of higher value in a survival situation makes it no intrinsically better than another nor more beautiful. The only reason they ever were was when survival...

[Asker]

was a real and constant concern. It was better for the species to be attracted to full breasts and curving hips in women and strong muscles and athleticism in men because those things directly insured the survival of them and their offspring. But we are not subject to natural selection anymore, not to the degree we were 10 thousand years ago, nor a thousand years ago. We formed societies created technologies and medicine. Beauty is no longer a subject of survival. It's completely subjective...

[Opinion Owner]

A problem for ME? No. Where in my answer did you derive that from?

[Asker]

and, objectively, no view of "beauty: is better than another. No one has anything wrong with them because their ideas of who is attractive don't align with the historical definition of beauty which only existed out of evolutionary necessity. For better or worse for our species, natural selection is not the defining force in our existence anymore and what right does anyone have to tell anyone else that the person that makes them happy is a sign of something wrong in their head. Shame on you.

[Asker]

"I think anybody that is attracted to something that is not the natural form/state of a person, they probably have some issues." "So something that goes in the face of that should be unattractive. If the person finds that trait specifically attractive it says something went haywire." You stated it pretty clearly, MindlyOriginal.

[Opinion Owner]

You can spin it how ever you want, but attraction isn't a choice. It's biological. So to try and say that biology doesn't play a role anymore is silly. Some of it is environmental conditioning, no doubt. But it's just as much biological. There's a reason certain characteristics are widely agreed upon in society to be beautiful or favorable. Because it's part of the biological norm to want that. Since every possible biological imperative can be altered and every environmental condition can

[Opinion Owner]

be altered and have multiple sides, every scenario has played out. So there is somebody out there attracted to whatever you can think up if it's biologically and environmentally possible. Maybe something happened in their childhood that made them unattracted to the norm or attracted to the abnorm. Maybe biologically something was altered right from the start that made that person geared towards a specific attraction. Whatever it is, that issue is what caused them to diverge from the norm.

[Asker]

Of course it's biological, but just as much as the societal ideal of beauty is determined without choice, so is the ideals of someone who does not align with society's ideals. But just because they have skewed off the ideal determined by a successful evolutionary path, does not mean they are defective. Those non-evolutionary views have always existed just as they do today. But only some were evolutionary successful. That doesn't mean the unsuccessful ones were wrong, they just weren't...

[Opinion Owner]

It's called a norm for a reason. It's no different than somebody who has too high or too low an intelligence has an issue. Maybe it was biological, maybe it was environmental, but either way, they are a statistical anomaly, they diverted from the norm. That issue isn't necessarily a defect or a purely negative attribute. Doesn't mean they didn't encounter an issue during development to cause this.

[Opinion Owner]

Saying they are defective is your words, not mine. Any abnormal attribute, positive or negative, is the result of a developmental issue biologically or environmentally. It's an issue because it's a process that doesn't normally occur. It's doing something other than what is supposed to happen. There's nothing defective about it, but because it has diverted from the usual course, it is an issue.

[Asker]

productive to our evolutionary success. But in our world, one does not need to a child-bearing athlete to be successful in procreating and passing on your genetics to the next line. It's not "surival of the fittest" it's "survival of the fit enough". Society has lowered the bar on what is "fit enough" so it makes no sense to keep the same ridiculously high bar of beauty that, increasingly, no one fits into. That idea of beauty is not objectively better nor is it evolutionarily necessary anymore

[Opinion Owner]

Just because it's not objectively better or evolutionary necessary anymore doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Millions of years of "survival of the fittest" written into our genetic code doesn't get erased by a couple thousand years of easier life, or a couple 100 years of getting rid of that biological imperative. It might not be necessary, but all the remnants are still there, which means to some degree, the vast majority will still want the same basic things, whether you like it or not.

[Asker]

I didn't say it wouldn't exist anymore. I'm saying one shouldn't value it over any other just because more people align with it.

[Opinion Owner]

And I'm saying they will value it more than another trait because there's a REASON why most people align with it. They aren't just doing it because it's the in thing to do. Most people are compelled to feel that way at a fundamental level. It's not some conscious thought. A biological or environmental imperative just IS. Most people just aren't attracted to obese people. It's not a conscious thought, it just exists. If they are attracted to that, it's either a biological abnormality or an

[Opinion Owner]

environmental factor similar to how I see smoking. I see somebody smoking cigarettes and without even thinking about it, all romantic interest has immediately stopped. That's because of an environmental upbringing where at a young age I saw an immediate relative die directly as a result. It had a strong impact and now that's just something ingrained. (obviously we don't have a biological aversion to the sight of people smoking) Either way, there's a biological/environmental norm for a reason.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Of course they don't, people these days are shallow. Women, men, everyone. But at least with men there are those with variety. Guys who like overly skinny, guys who like over weight girls, guys who like apple shape, hourglass shape, etc. But women, even if they are OK and can get over a guy's appearance, still all seem to prefer the same damn type far as I can tell. Society seems to be getting shallower and shallower tbh.

[lottierose]

Personally, I don't mind if a guy is chubby. I tend to go for guys that are bigger than me in someway (be it height, muscle, weight, broad shoulders etc) Generally I'd rather feel like the smaller one in the relationship, so a bit of extra weight isn't an issue. Plus, it can make guys seem more cuddly or less intimidating, which although sounds a bit too cute for some guys to take it as a compliment, those are attractive qualities.

I'd rather a guy be a bit over than a bit underweight. I guess it depends how they carry themselves and the weight, and how much extra you mean. Chubby is fine, and like I said can be kinda cute, but I guess it's all on a scale. The guys who are into huge women are a tiny minority, just with the accessibility of p*rn and making this weight thing almost a fetish, it means you probably see this around disproportionately to the number of guys actually into that.

[MissConfused93]

I don't mind a guy being chubby if I have feelings for him. If I'm watching p*rn, I'm not going to look for an overweight guy. Yes, what the girl below me said about not being crushed is true. Sex isn't that comfortable if he's super over weight, but I can work around it as long as he's not super obese. I can deal with a chubby guy- my boyfriend is a bit on the bigger side - but I'm not attracted to it.

I'm sorry to say, but although there are always exceptions, most women who like larger guys will more likely than not be overweight also, and it will mostly be because she feels you're in her league.

[Asker]

That's as good an answer as I expected, actually. As I said, I've never heard of a woman attracted to big guys' bodies. I thought I'd poll some people though, see if anyone could prove my conclusion wrong. At the very least, you score points for honesty and being able to see past a man's size for who he really is.

[Prof_Don]

thumb-up #1 for you...you always give honest answers, MissConfused. :)

[BubbleBee22]

i love chubby guys :D ..because they make me feel really small ...even though I am small..i like feeling even smaller! ha ha plus chubby guys think my body is one of a goddess...i think they appreciate curves more and less judging . I'm in LOVE with seth rogan :D if I could sleep with him everyday, I would :D

[kdizzleforizzle91]

Chubby meaning a little extra meat is fine, but extremely large is a turn-off.

[Kadiboma]

I don't know if I'd describe what I like as 'chubby', but I prefer men with a little bit to get hold of. I want to feel feminine and protected when I'm with a man, so I like them to be bigger built than me. I'm also not hugely into muscles and 6-packs, I don't mind a guy who has a bit of a belly either.

If you put a muscular man, a slim man and a man with a few extra pounds on him, I would choose the latter! Put it that way!

[dragonfly6516]

I'm attracted to personality, not looks. I have a few "chubby" guy friends that I think are very sexy, but it's because of their personality. I will say though, I don't think they would look good skinny.

[Asker]

Some guys really don't! I'm not naturally my size and I want to lose weight for both my health and my appearance. I have the build to have a pretty nice body if I worked at it and I think I would look much better in the face without the full cheeks and chin. But I have guy friends who I can't even imagine being skinny. They look like they were made to be chubby and don't look bad like that. But most have trouble with women. One especially funny guy, I have no idea how it can be that way for him.

[dragonfly6516]

I love to cuddle, but I don't like guy who are too girlie and sensitive; a big man who can easily swap from Teddy to Grizzly is totally sexy! I like feeling warm and safe!

[Asker]

Understandable. Actually, that sounds very similar to what some gay communities enjoy. Big hairy gay men are known as "bears" and their partners are "cubs", the appeal, as I understand it, being much the same as you described. He can be your teddy one minute and your grizzly the next. But often those cubs are smaller men who like big men. I see that FAR less often in straight couples and even when the woman is smaller, it tends to be that she lost weight or he gained it after the fact.

[dragonfly6516]

I'm a bigger gal already, so even more I like those men who can be both grizzly and teddy ;) It's hard for a smaller guy to cuddle me properly :P

[Prof_Don]

I have to concur; some dudes imo won't look very good skinny because of having a bigger bone structure.

[lananoel]

I actually prefer larger sized men. Not fat just softer like a teddy bear. Never dated one but I imagine that the extra would be better to snuggle with.

[Amb-iguous]

What's your definition of chubby? I use it more for a fuller face and a tummy that's not flat. I vastly prefer this to a scrawny guy. If we are talking overweight however it has never attracted me.

[RedSmartie]

I'm a chubby chaser. I'll admit I've had far too many skinny guys (and I mean like stick thin. One guy was 6'2 and 120 lbs!) but I'm not too attracted to them. I like a guy who is chubby just because they seem to be sweeter and they often have really friendly faces. Also, I'm not really fat but I'm not skinny either so I like to be smaller than the guys I date.

[jessjessxoxo]

I like body builders the best. Six-pack ftw.

Average is OK, I guess.

Chubby, meh.

Fat or scrawny (petite) - no, just no. Not even going there.

*Don't worry, I know girls who like chubby guys.

[G_GTom]

There are probably some, but women are not like guys. There are guys who are into chubby gals. Women not so much. You might be able to find a women who prefers it, but your more likely to find a woman who will try to look past it.

[emzy-89]

if I'm really attracted to them I don't really care about size as long as he's healthy. I know women you like chubbier guys a lot more than slimmer men

[Anonymous]

I am not

[Anonymous]

Yes! Yes! Yes!

I don't know what it is but when a guy has some extra fluff its cute. My ex had I think they're called love handles. I don't know it drove me crazy when he was in his business clothes for work. Guys who are on the bigger side tend to be kinder and have an amazing personality. Obviously not always true my ex was a jerk BUT still haha.

[Anonymous]

As long as I like him I wouldn't mind. My boyfriend is much taller then me and chubby maybe more then chubby bt I love him and I find him attractive. His the only chubby guy I've been with bt I've always preferred guys who have more meat on their bones I'm not so much attracted to skinny guys .

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is very muscular but has a bit of a belly and I love it : )

[Anonymous]

I like a guy with a cute little tummy :) I don't really care for super skinny guys. I'm much less attracted. I just like bigger guys, I don't know why. I just do.

[Anonymous]

Well, I think a chubby woman would like a chubby guy because you both have similar sized bodies that you feel normal around each other.

Problem with chubby guys is petite women don't want to feel crushed under the weight and we can't see the muscle definition that we like so much.

I'm not into chubby men's bodies. It looks unhealthy to me.

I'm not even into big football player types because they are just too gigantic.

[Asker]

Chubby women may like chubby men because they can relate in size, I agree. That's why chubby men often match with chubby women. The women don't feel bad about their size and they don't mind the guy's size like a skinnier woman would. But that's not the same as being attracted to a chubby man's body.

[Opinion Owner]

So, no I'm not attracted to a chubby body. Like no I don't want to see chubby guys in p*rn. I like my men lean and mean.

[Asker]

No, I know. I got that from your post. I was just clarifying your point that chubby women may like chubby men.

[Opinion Owner]

I think chubby women even like chubby guys bodies. But it all depends. Some guys have sort of a strong and stout chubby thing and women probably dig that. I'm thinking those Scottish Highland games dudes who carry tree trunks around.

[Opinion Owner]

A chubby woman might see you as a mirror image of herself and like your body.

[Asker]

Haha. That sounds kind of narcissistic.

[Opinion Owner]

Well what I mean is I see the world from my own eyes. When I am a little kid the adults look large and tall. When I am an adult the kids look little. When I am too skinny then even normal size people look a bit on the fleshy side. When I am a bit on the fleshy side then fleshier men look more normal to me. Do you catch my drift?

[Opinion Owner]

Is Zac Brown from the Zac Brown Band chubby? I sort of think a stoutish guy might be okay. Like Russel Crowe has that brawny thing going on, can have some extra chub on. For me, I'm quite a petite gal so even if I liked a guy as a person and everything I'm not sure how much man I can handle, I think most bigger guys like a substantial woman also.

[Asker]

Yeah. It sounded more like you meant that a chubby woman thinks her body is the ideal and should find a partner that matches her perfection. But yeah, that's pretty much why I figure bigger men have more success with bigger women, and vice versa to a large degree. Though it may have less to do with skewed perception and more with comfort, security in their self-image and relatability.

[Opinion Owner]

So the two guys I mentioned below you consider them chubby? Or who is chubby? There is a scale of chubby you know.

[Opinion Owner]

Some people also carry their chub beautifully. Then there are some who don't.

[Asker]

Sorry, I didn't see that. Zac Brown might be a little chubby, yeah. But I think, like you said, he's mostly just brawny. And the beard makes his face seem rounder, too. Russel Crowe isn't chubby though, no. He might be getting a little flabby in his age, but he's still a pretty brawny guy. Actually, I'm a brawny guy, myself, but I have chub on top of that. I need to lose weight, but not for any woman. I need to because I think I would feel better in both my appearance and my health in general.

[Asker]

I carried it very well for a long time. I'm a lot heavier than people guess. But I feel more and more like I'm losing that.

[Opinion Owner]

I'm really addicted to coffee but I stopped drinking it about a week ago. It sort of gives me a rash on my face so it makes my skin look bad but I just was feeling crap about myself so I didn't care that it was making my appearance worse and I loved waking up to coffee. Recently though I figured I should try to care about how I look and after a week I think I look better already...I actually think romance is a good motivator for trying to look one's best!

[Asker]

Well, I agree with that to a point. I certainly get motivated to improve myself if I have someone to improve myself for. But at the same time, I think you should be concerned, first and foremost about how you feel about yourself and your appearance and much less how others, even someone you have romantic interests in, feels about it. i.e. If you want to change to feel better about yourself, then do. But if you want to change because someone won't like you otherwise, that doesn't seem right.

[Asker]

Sorry you didn't say that you should change to get romance, I misunderstood. You pretty much said what I did, that a romantic interest is a good MOTIVATOR to improve yourself, but not the not the cause.

[Opinion Owner]

The world isn't right. It's way off track. Though it's still the world.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, I know somebody who quit smoking for a marriage...It was a deal breaker for the guy so that gal stopped smoking.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, I would almost cut my arm off right now for romance. Although yes, I was saying romantic interest GIVES energy to MAKE positive changes. Romantic interest has an up-beat energy to it.

[Asker]

Ha. Well, I'm kind of old school. If they don't like me as I am, then they don't like me, do they? I shouldn't need to change for someone, but I can use someone as a motivation to change if I so wish. As for your friend that quit smoking that's more a matter of compromise when it comes to marriage, and smoking is kind of a special case, anyway, as it would always affect the health of both them and their family, which is a different issue entirely.

[Opinion Owner]

Who wants to be married to a person who will have a heart attack?

[Prof_Don]

Hopefully Ms. Answerer, as you know, the use of BMI to judge weight is way too inaccurate; the specs for that were made around the World War II era, and DOESNT FACTOR MUSCLE MASS. Any "health system", in which muscle mass is a negative, is a system that is stupid. The reason why some guys "carry their weight well" is because they're built to be bigger. They have larger&denser bones and gain muscle mass more easily. If their bodyfat % is healthy, that's all that matters.

[Prof_Don]

So therefore, a guy can be "lean and mean", and not be slender, because he has lots of muscle and low bodyfat %. So therefore some football players you role out as "not being into" are "lean and mean" by those specs. So you'll gonna have to find another, more accurate slogan for the type of guys you like because your definition is flawed. :-P

[Asker]

well said, Prof Don. And on top of that, recent studies have shown that a full half of people who are overweight actually have no negative health risks associated with their weight. And only a portion of the other half actually have serious risks associated with their weight. That fat automatically means unhealthy is a myth and a stigma.

[Opinion Owner]

I know Don, but I'm like a humming bird...and some guys are like polar bears.

[Opinion Owner]

Chihuahuas don't mate with Mastiffs.

[Anonymous]

I think guys who are attracted to obese woman are in a small minority, honestly. I wouldn't doubt that there's a similar small minority of females out there ... Though I do know many couples who are both pretty chubby who have a fine relationship. I don't know what their physical attraction is, but some of them I know have kids so they at least have enough to have some sex life. Being severely overweight isn't a permanent trait, though.

[Asker]

Well, two things. First, I'm not severely overweight, but for some, it is permanent. There are conditions where people naturally put on weight and can't do anything about it without surgery (like how women can have a bigger butt or breasts than others naturally). Second, I wasn't putting down chubby couples, nor their sex lives. Trust me, they can be just as active as anyone else. My point was that big women tend not to mind men's size much, but they aren't necessarily attracted to it either.

[Opinion Owner]

I think that goes for the man in most of those relationships, as well is what I'm saying.

[Asker]

In a lot of cases, I'm sure you're right. Not every man with a chubby woman likes her body. But there are men (big and small) who specifically love big women's bodies. Just google "bbw" (at your own risk) and you'll have your proof of that. That p*rnography exists for that specific deemographic of guys who love big women. Are there ANY women out there then who feel the same about big men or is every big guy's girlfriend or wife just working to get past his size.

[Opinion Owner]

Like I said above, probably. BBW guys seem to be an overexaggerated minority from what I know about guys. Are you in that minority?

[Asker]

I have my limits, too, actually. I like bodies of most sizes, but after certain point, no. I am not a bbw guy. It's a natural reaction, and I don't begrudge anyone for not being attracted to someone that doesn't do it for them, as I am no better. I've hit my limits too. A few girls who liked me that were just too big to get past. I have been attracted to plenty of plus sized women, though, including their bodies. Really, for me, though, it's all about her face, especially her eyes and her smile.

[Opinion Owner]

I'd say that's pretty normal and that women have the a similar range as men, as far as natural attraction. But that some women give men an extra bit of leeway for good personalities.

[Anonymous]

No, why would they. The human body is not meant to have all that fat on it so naturally most females will be attracted to the more fit males. Just look at nature, almost no animals other than domesticated pets have any fat on them. And that is how it should be.

My advice is to lose weight and get in shape. Don't do it for the girls, do it for yourself.

[Asker]

Your argument doesn't hold up when you consider that men shouldn't be attracted to women with small breasts, poor skin pigmentation, old women or, yes, extremely large women as these are all poor qualities to be attracted to, evolutionarily speaking. So if men develop these attractions naturally, it still stands to reason that women should, too, unless they are overridden with societal ideals of what is "beautiful" and what isn't, right?

[Prof_Don]

QA wins this discussion here...that's a heavy flaw in your argument, Mr. Anonym. :-P