My supervirginity problem

[Anonymous]

As it was my birthday recently I did a bit philosophizing on where I am in life and how things are going. Here goes: I am a 24 year old male and I am the ultimate in virginity. I have never: - Slept with a girl - Kissed a girl - Held hands - Went out with a girl or held hands with one - Flirted with a girl (or if she was flirting with me, I was ignorant of it) Long story short: I have never done anything at all with a female, zero, zilch. In addition to that I don´t really have any friends. I recently moved to London and haven´t really built up a social circle so I don´t have people to go out with. I get along with people just fine and I suppose I am not completely without a sense of humor but I am no good at taking things further than that and this applies very much so when talking to girls. As I virtually skipped the entire party/social phase of both high school and university, I never learned the social skills that most people are equipped with. I feel uncomfortable in pubs and other places where there´s loud music and a lot of alcohol. Not that I am a horrible conversationalist overall (though I do have my troubles with it), its that particularly in social settings and even more so when talking to a girl that my conversation skills get worse and worse. On the other hand I have little trouble talking to people, men or women, at work. Since I was a teenager I constantly kept thinking that "I´ll get a girlfriend/laid/a kiss" when I reach 16 or 18. Then when I reached 18 I thought it would happen at university. 3 years of that went by and I thought that its sure to happen when I start work. Well here I am and I´m no closer to getting a kiss or a date than when the cycle started 10 years ago. Other than that life is fine. I´ve got a nice white collar job and I am tall and quite muscular (as I love weightlifting) so I´d like to think that at least some girl might consider me something less than repulsive. As for improving my "game" with women, I have read some of the works of Carlos Xuma as well as The Game so I am trying to better myself in this area, however I do feel that I other guys who have had normal social and dating lives have a head start on me. Questions: 1) Girls: is there an age for a guy where for you his megavirginity (as in never done anything like I described) becomes a deal breaker? Not that I would go around advertising my exact status but assuming you knew and of course it would quickly become obvious that I don´t have the slightest clue of what I am doing. Or to phrase the question another way: is there a point at which you expect a guy to at least know the basics of romance/dating/sex and you wouldn´t want to play teacher? 2) Guys: Can you recommend some good convesration/flirting/pickup books to read? Or any other tips you have to become better at talking to girls. Any general comments (and especially advice) are welcome.

[TimePhantom]

Honestly I think you are over thinking things. I was 23 and in the same boat as you. But the thing that I guess helped me in a sense was that I made a decision that I would be alright with where I was in terms of girls. So all my friends had girlfriends and I was the only virgin. I still hung out with them, I still went to work, I still enjoyed my life; why should I worry so much about being a virgin. With that attitude I began to feel more comfortable talking to girls, because then the goal wasn't to try and sleep with them, it was simply me having a conversation with another person. If things progressed and I felt comfortable enough with her to ask her out, then great, but if not then I knew it wasn't a big deal. In the end it's really all about your mindset. Don't build things up to be bigger issues than they are. Also, you have to want to improve not only your social skills with women, but with everyone. You need to get out of your comfort zone a bit to try and be more social. You don't like going to pubs, then you need to find a different place where you can go and be social.

[kheserthorpe]

You don't need a book - at this point.

You're in a crowded city no doubt full of people used to ignoring strangers.

I want you to say 'hi' or hello to five strangers a day for the next week. That's it. Thy might say hi back. They might look stunned. They might swear at you. They might strike up a conversation.

Go do it, report back and ill assign phase two.

[Daph81]

Is there a way I can follow your interaction? (I mean between Answerer and QA) seems like it could be really interesting lol

[kheserthorpe]

If he does updates sure, if not message me.

[blondebeauty27]

it doesn't mean you're ,in your words, repulsive. it just means you're sorta shy in social situations. have you ever thought that maybe all the girls who have ever liked you were shy themselves and waiting for you to make the first move? I would expect a guy to know something by 17 [basics like kissing/holding hands/ dating] and sex by 21. and you're not alone I've seen other questions male and female where they've never had any experiences.

[Alonso14]

I think you should find a therapist who specialises in dealing with people with social problems. I'd also recommend avoiding anything on the internet which is trying to sell you a magic way of attracting women, no such thing exists.

[moviedude714]

I hate being male often times

[dkmike]

You are not alone,I'm the same but for different reasons.if you want to talk friend me.