Very inexperienced at sex, feel like the 40 year old virgin. Will guys be turned off?

[Anonymous]

I've dated and been in a few relationships but very inexperienced in sex (I can count on one hand the amount of times). As I got older I tend to shy away from it because I am afraid that I am not good at it and it often hurts and also afraid the guy will dump me because of it. I often feel very embarrassed about me being inexperienced especially at my age. I feel like the 40 year old virgin. Not sure what to do. During sex or even masturbating I often can't relax and allow myself to let go. Which then turns into me feeling bad about myself and thinking what the hell is wrong with me. I guess, my question is will guys be turned off knowing that I am inexperienced? I am 35! So please no hurtful comments that I am younger. It just makes me feel worse about myself and my situation.

[Married-in-PA]

Mlle.,

You definitely require the attention of a patient, older man. If I were you, I would let your youth and looks attract a man my age (or a bit older), and then be brutually honest. Explain that you need teaching. A good man will not reject you for this, as long as he understands your situation.

I mean, if he thinks your an Axe Murderer, he'll run. LOL. But, I do not think this is you.

From what I read, there is nothing "wrong" with you. When I married my wife, she was a virgin at 26. What I am trying to say is that your inexperience is not necessarily a turn-off. In fact, you could say it's a pleasant challenge to the right man.

[THE_Godfather]

Try watching some homemade p*rno films. Profession ones are great but too over the top.

They may help you get in the mood.

Just relax & experiment on yourself. Buy some toys & have fun.

I learned how my d*** works by playing with it.

[THE_Godfather]

Read this. It may help.

link

[whoknows175]

I would suggest you purchase a dildo. You'll gain confidence and learn what feels good for you, all while getting your body to the point where sex no longer hurts. Be sure to use lube, tho.

If a guy cares, and you are open to learning what makes him feel good, then he should be fine. If not, you're better off without him anyway. Plenty of great guys out there, girl.

FYI: I highly recommend the "rabbit" dildo. Trust me. Amazing little invention. ;-)

[Married-in-PA]

Well spoken, Mlle.

[MikeK]

I'm sure you'll fare quite well - just put yourself out there.

If a guy isn't understanding about that, then he's not worth it anyway.

[Jamesthehuman]

Alright girlie. Its fine! As long as you are willing to try things he likes. That's pretty much what it takes for a girl to be good. Willing to try different stuff and wanting to try different stuff because youwant to.

[Anonymous]

i'm 25 and have only had sex once

[Anonymous]

I am 27 and have had sex probably 3 times. It's an insecurity of mine too. I'm not too worried overall though. Women can be really submissive and let the guy lead anyway.