Sexual Health
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Why is my man looking at fat girl p*rn?

I'm a liberal women when it comes to p*rn. My man and I watch p*rn together. We have our own p*rn that we masturbate to apart from each other. But when I saw a bunch of photos of disgusting fat girls who are ugly on his pictures on his computer, it really threw me for a loop! I'm pretty attractive I'm blonde blue eyes at 5 foot six, sexy and if I had to rate myself I would say I was a 9 1/2. Just giving you that rating info because I think it's important to understand how I felt when I saw those photos. Women are born into a world that is very judgmental of us on how we look, especially by men and we strive to do that and become that for our men. And when girls are groomed from birth to seek men's attention while men are so powerfully critical of our bodies and we practically kill ourselves to look as perfect as we can, and then you find out your man is looking at fat girls with saggy tits, arrrggghhh! It's a bit confusing to say the least. And it's done a complete mind fuck on me. To say the very least! So, tell me guys, why are looking at this and jerking off to it? I'm wondering if I should have been eating doughnuts all this time instead if salads and working out at the gym! Help me to understand...
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Most common reason he's looking at fat girl p*rn?

    Because you aren't fat.

    Men are programmed to desire variation, and without the structure of society (which was largely built by the influence of women), men would just go around and bang any girl he could. But that's of course not acceptable in modern society, so men use other outlets, such as p*rn, these days (before p*rn there were brothels and mistresses).

    So, your guy is remaining faithful to you and not sleeping around, but he still has instincts to desire variation. That instinct comes from the fact that genetic variations lead to stronger, healthier genetics for offspring and strengthens the gene pool in general.

    Anyway, it's extremely common for men to look at girls in p*rn who look nothing like the girl they are with. If you were blonde and had big boobs, maybe he'd look at petite brunettes, or tall redheads, or flat-chested Latinas, or black women with afros, or in your guy's case, fat girls. They are interesting to him because they are DIFFERENT from you. It's very likely that you are what he prefers, and are what he would chose if you died/disappeared/broke up with him. But p*rn allows for fantasies, which often means thinking about things that we would never do in real life. Some guys like 18 year olds, and some like foreign girls, and some guys like "grannies," and some guys like borderline-anorexic girls, or whatever, because they are DIFFERENT and, for a little while, interesting.

    It doesn't "mean" anything beyond that. He's not wanting YOU to look that way, and if you did, he'd be looking at fit, athletic girls (like you actually are), because then THAT would be different.

    Porn is FANTASY, and guys know the difference and in most cases are perfectly happy to keep Fantasy and Reality SEPARATE. Liking something in his fantasies does not mean he wants that thing in reality, anymore than watching Top Gun is going to make him enlist in the Navy to become an aviator. He might fantasize about flying a jet, but that doesn't mean he's ready to actually DO it. Same thing.

    • Mr Oracle, thanks II do totally get the variation thing, as we both look at many of the categories of p*rn and enjoy it, both separately and together, I was just taken aback by this category selection. I'm not trying to be mean, I'm sure these girls are really nice people, but these weren't girls with a little extra, I'm talking big and not attractive in the face either. I thought p*rn was based on superficial attractiveness. My man is hot, too, a 10. These pix were stuff that guys talk bad a

    • After eating lobster and prime rib every day, most guys will start to crave a hot dog, even though quality-wise it could be any further from prime rib. This is just a "palate cleanser" for him; something wildly different and interesting and unlike what he's used to, but he'll probably move on after a while. Nothing to be concerned about.

  • The thing with p*rn is... You get to try something different all the time. And so you do.

    Look at it this way: sex is like food. With a woman like you, he is eating prime rib steak every night. Which is freaking awesome of course. But when he gets the chance to mix it up, he might try a hamburger... Or maybe even fried insects... You know, just to try it for once. Sure, the steak at home is still the absolute best, but sometimes the fact that something is different from the usual is enough to be desirable.

    For instance: I don't want to date an older woman... But in p*rn I like them. That doesn't mean I want my girlfriend to be older or that I'm going to cheat on her.

    Now, if it was exclusively fat p*rn... I'd get a little worried. But if it is only a fragment of his collection... It is just something he occasionally enjoys.

    Frankly I'd be more upset if he was only googling other "steaks" if I were you. Why would you watch an attractive, blonde, blue eyed, 5 foot six, sexy "9 1/2" online if he had one sitting in the very next room? Think about it.

    • Hi Dutch Atheist, thanks for your comments, very helpful! And I totally get the variety bit, we both like a lot of variety in our p*rn. But for some reason, this one was offensive to me. And I guess the fact that he jerked off in the bathroom to it while I was home didn't make me feel too good about it either. I was like, WTF? I'm right here and you didn't even ask! And we have an awesome sex life! So, it just looked like he chose that over me and I felt pretty insulted. :(

Most Helpful Girls

  • Maybe it goes to show that we build this perfect image for men and deep down most don't really care he will love you the same if you changed your hair or put on 3 stones and went up more than 2 dress sizes. Most men tend to look at women that look nothing like the one they are with but it doesn't mean he isn't happy with want he has it's just it wouldn't be a fantasy if the women look just like what he has at home.

    • Ladyluck, yes you are right! I think that is the true lesson here. We women are raised under an illusion created by society and the media or whoever and we try to fit the mold with our hair, makeup, etc. it's just disheartening because I workout so hard and try to take care of myself. If that's not what men really want I wish they would have told me ages ago so I could have another slice of pizza, lol. :)

    • I meant wouldn't say you wasted your time

  • LMAO what a joke! Liberal? Yet you judge and expect him to have your same taste or standards. Maybe sometimes he wants less fake and shallow women. And I'm curious of your definition of "fat and ugly"

    Besides p*rn is just fantasies. Who hasn't seen weird stuff? I sometimes watch incest. It doesn't mean I want to bang anyone in my family.

    • I totally get the variety bit, we both like a lot of variety in our p*rn. But for some reason, this one was offensive to me. And I guess the fact that he jerked off in the bathroom to it while I was home didn't make me feel too good about it either. I was like, WTF? I'm right here and you didn't even ask! And we have an awesome sex life! So, it just looked like he chose that over me and I felt pretty insulted. :(

    • Well he did choose that over you. Maybe you should have a donut

    • Yeah, a dozen Krispy Kreme, lol.

    • Show All

  • As quiet as it's kept, a lot of men are sexually attracted to fat women even if they would never publicly date one.

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What Girls & Guys Said

5 9

  • NEVER make the mistake of comparing yourself or looking down on yourself.

    For him it's just variation and men (I know I'm a man :D) - a lot of men require and crave variation.

    There are times when one's got everything to his liking, his need for variation may want a lot of flesh etc similar to what you've noticed in your bf.

    However, he sure wont' want her as his girlfriend or wife :) you make the mistake of becoming like them and he'll probably watch you more time on tape and less in bed :D

    He's with you cause he likes/loves you and he's not with them. Leave him for a cpl of months with one of them and you'll probably find him with them only when he wants sex and nothing more.

  • No matter what AidenBlue has to say, I will never waste my time looking at fat women p*rn! Yuk! Why your Boyfriend is looking at it is beyond me... Maybe it's just a perv thing he has for fat women? Maybe he feels sorry for them and wants to have sex with them to make them feel better? Who knows. All I know that is the last thing I wanna watch...

    Good Luck!

    • Hi RidemyNorthface, thanks for answering my question, I appreciate it! We watch many varieties of p*rn and photos but this just struck me a little odd. For some reason it felt like a huge slap in the face to me. I felt disgusted, embarrassed and insulted. I was in the grocery store, in line, looking at the magazines with all these girls trying to lose weight and I thought how pathetic, what do they want to lose weight for? If guys just want to look at pictures of fat girls!

    • Yes I can see your point exactly! I'm curious, have you asked him about this?

  • Maybe you are not attractive as what you make it seem.

  • It may be wacky, but it is harmless. Fear not.

    • Follow up. It may be fascinating to him, in a "watch the car wreck" sort of way. Again, fear not.

  • So you are liberal until he does something you can't understand. It's a fantasy. It has no bearing on reality.

    • I'm not saying I'm not going to be liberal on it. I haven't asked him to get rid of it. I wouldn't do that. I'm just trying to understand from all you guys point of view which is why I'm on here asking the question from you fine lads. Because I really don't understand and I'm struggling to, see? :)

    • Sometimes we like looking at different stuff from what we have.

    • Ok, fair enough.

  • no offense but would you rather he looked a transgender porn? With the transwoman fucking the dude or vice versa.

  • You are the one who seems to be judgmental on looks. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and no reason overweight women can't be sexy as well. Maybe he enjoys the variety or maybe they were pictures he d/l to send his friends as a joke.

    Either way to get mad at him for enjoying larger women makes you shallow.

    Men are not so powerfully critical of your bodies - YOU ARE. Women need to just relax. Yes, as men we really enjoy a woman with a gym perfected body with perky boobs and great curves - but that is not the ONLY WOMAN who turns us on. I've been attracted to no butt, big butt, small boobs, big boobs, blonde brunnette etc. Many times a girls personality and attitude are hotter than her body.

    Stop being so critical and shallow.

    • Hi Aidan, thanks for your input, I do appreciate it. I'm not trying to be shallow but let's face it when it comes to p*rn, it is shallow. It's based upon attractiveness. It's not like basing a relationship upon the way that someone looks, we're talking about p*rn here. And I just thought that fat, ugly girls with saggy tits weren't attractive. It's not a common measurement of attractiveness, am I right? And us girls work so hard to be attractive for our men that it's just a little disappointin

  • It’s cause he’s probably into saggy tits

  • Many men and women are simply attracted to fat people. They're sometimes called "chubby chasers." It's probably a relic from ages past when being fat meant you got to eat regularly.

  • ...and above all, you're very modest too.

    • Don't claim to be modest, just telling it like it is. It was important to include for the context of the question.

  • Some guys are into that doesn't mean he doesn't find you attractive.

    • Yeah, I know it's out there, it's just that he's never been into it til now.

  • I'm sorry. I don't understand that s*** very disgusting

  • You said you're a liberal but sure as hell don't act like it

    • I'm not saying I'm not going to be liberal on it. I haven't asked him to get rid of it. I wouldn't do that. I'm just trying to understand from all of your points of view which is why I'm on here asking the question from you fine lads. Because I really don't understand and I'm struggling to, see? :)

    • I would say you have wasted you time at all its a fantasy sometime you would do in real life so he is attracted to you and if you looked like the women he may have not shown an interested other than to fulfil a short fantasy but you would never been long term

  • Ok well... you're man's a chubby chaser XD he likes the cushion for the pushin, but you shouldn't think that he doesn't find you attractive.

    He's with you because you're clearly a devoted, loving and beautiful young woman, the kinda girl he's not going to let go, but well, your man has a fetish, he likes the fat girls on screen but he likes you in the bed.

    It's like my previous girlfriend, she had a bunch of anime p*rn in her stash, she would get off to watching some cartoon girl take in 20 feet of tentacles up her ass, but you know what? when I asked her about it, she said that kinda stuff would be revolting in real life, but she likes the fantasy.

    and that's what your man has with his fatty p*rn stash, a fantasy he has no interest in pursuing other than looking at it on a computer or TV screen.

    you're man's good, he just has himself a fetish XD

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