How can I stop having sex with random people?

I keep having sex with random people, and I just can't stop. It's not healthy and I don't know what to do.
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+1 y
I'm 17 years old. And I always make the guy wrap it. I've come to realize that this really is not good.
0 2

Most Helpful Guys

  • Well, "random people" is just dangerous. Do you know these people at all? Not only could you catch a disease but each random person you get busy with is one step closer to the eventual weirdo/stalker/date rapist that won't stay within your boundaries.

    But "lots of people" isn't necessarily that awful. I mean to some, "lots" equals five. To others, fifty. To others five hundred. To pretend that there's a "good" number out there for you to adhere to is sanctimonious and false. (Even I agree that 500 is too many but that's not my point. ) My point is how many do you want to have sex with? Zero? Three? Six? Okay, then embrace that amount as appropriate for your sex drive and go screw that number and no more. (Well, you can't really get there retroactively but going forward. ) Say "I want to have sex with one guy this year. " Okay, now figure out who the lucky guy is, get busy with him, and only him. It's YOUR sex life.

    That said, even the total prudes are correct that the more people you boff, the more at risk you are for disease and unwanted pregnancy, not to mention the tangentials such as "bad reputation" and "heartache" and so on.

    Finally, of course you can stop if you REALLY wanted to. People choosing negative behavior tend not to like to hear this; they tend to excuse their way out of ANYTHING. But the truth is that you are in control of how often you choose to have sex. This isn't like "I keep breaking out in a rash and I don't know what to do. " Instead, this is conscious, intentional behavior so own it.

    I don't want to make light if you are "addicted" or "compensating for inadequate attention from dad" or "acting out against authority" or any conceivable, real, psychological/behavioral explanation for your actions. There IS a core reason (or two) inside you and its resulting in you behaving against your own wishes. So go talk to a counselor about sex addiction, and so on. There are THOUSANDS of people going through therapy programs successfully specifically for this problem as we speak. Go join them and then you'll get better and feel better. BTW, whether its sex addiction or gambling or yelling at your kids or anything in your control, the programs will all tell you roughly the same message as my previous paragraph. You can't stop it until you realize you own it and its up to you and only you to stop it.

  • You need to stop before you get herpes or AIDS and die. You need to change what you do for fun, into something safe that makes it easier for you to resist temptation. You probably think your friends are cool, but they're probably losers and are helping you ruin your life. Lose them and know that you own your life, and you control it, and if you don't start changing things in a big big way, your life will end in misery. You weren't born starving in Africa, you were born into America, where people have the best chance to live in all of the known universe. You have your whole life to screw up or get better, so start now before it's too late!

Most Helpful Girls

  • honey, you've got to just keep your legs together.

    here's my thinking: you probably sleep around to feel like you're getting some good attention.believe me, it's nice to feel wanted. so maybe if you can't fix the root problem (that you need to have attention all the time), feed it in a different way. make it a big deal that you're changing your ways. people will notice and you'll receive attention like you want.

    another idea: cut guys out completely.no kissing, touching, or even flirting. focus on your girlfriends for a while. it's going to suck and it has to be a conscious decision, but it'll help.

  • OK, your profile says you're under 18 - do your parents know? Would they be supportive if you told them? If not, do you have health insurance and can you go see a counselor or psychiatrist? Make something up to tell your parents why if you need to. Talk to a school counselor. Go to a Planned Parenthood.

    But whatever you do, PLEASE get help. You're right - it isn't healthy mentally or bodily. You're getting a lot of possible exposure to things like AIDS.

  • How can't you stop - I mean how old are you? The only thing I can suggest is if you can't stop use protection - lots of it! Also why don't you just talk to someone I mean sex at this age - that is if your 15 or 16 is very addicting you could stop at any moment though it is possible maybe you just don't want to cause it feels too good.

  • This is not good. Maybe you have some kind of addiction or something. I don't really know but you need to find someone that you can talk to about this.

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 4
  • You know what to do, STOP HAVING SEX. You need to change who you hang out with, where you go, and stop putting yourself in situations you shouldn't be in.

    It sounds like you have a self esteem problem. Just because a guy sleeps with you, doesn't mean anything. A guy will put his thing in anything he can.

    Stop having sex, have some self esteem, and have some self worth. Do you really want to be known as a slut? Don't you think higher of yourself then that?

  • If you really want to stop, focus your energy in other areas, such as some kind of a new hobby. Use your imagination.

    Have the self control to stop the behavior that you don't want. You can make yourself if you try hard enough.

  • It's not your fault. Humans want pleasure. It's more important you realize that you do not want to continue to have sex with random people. It's a pity that you lost the time to have love, so that you were plunged into the practice of finding pleasure through with random people. It was the man's fault who had the first time sex with you and abandoned you. That person made you feel left out and all alone, so you need company and try to find company. Don't be a corpse!

  • Let’s meet up