Sexual Health
+1 y

He touched my breasts, help!

We were sitting together, he put his hand on my shoulder as he usually does. But this time he slid it under my tee. He went as far as touching my nipples. At that time I was taken back and I did nothing and I actually enjoyed it. I wasn't thinking. We've been together for 6 months and he's never done anything like this before so I got upset and didn't talk much after this happened. He understood that there's a problem and apologized few days later. He told me "Just tell me what to do because I can't take away the guilt of what I did to you" He said it happened because it's the age of raging hormones and blah blah But few days later I was wearing a low cut top and he slid his fingers across its neck and said that its a great top... "coz its soo deep".. I am mad at him again. What should I do? He told me he's guilty and that he'd respect me but still glances at my breasts or tries to accidentally touch them at every chance he gets. He's a nice guy but I'm just not ok with him doing anything with my breasts. How do I deal with this? Any advice is appreciated.
Updates:
+1 y
I've heard that "If you give them a little ""taste'', they'll just come running back for more."... This scares me
0 0

Most Helpful Guys

  • Everyone should have some kind of physical sharing of affection in a relationship.

    I think the issues isn't that he touched and touches your breast. If the past 6mos have gone well you should be wanting to touch him too. In this society men have to make the first move to continue the species.

    I think the real issue for you is that he didn't talk to you about moving to that level before doing it. Or you have some kind of rape fantasy going on.

    Stop focusing on the breast touching, which is appropriate. Start focusing on his lack of communication about it, which isn't. Especially if you and he have not touched each others spots at all before this. You need to stop being so passive and so quiet. This is your boyfriend and your relationship. Take some ownership of it and tell him to back the F off. At the same time you should be interested in touching him and kissing and all but sex if you want to wait on that. He wants to learn how to turn you on physically like he has emotionally and mentally. You should want to do the same at this point. Start communicating damnit! ;-) I suggest that you tell him just to ask first for a while until you get comfortable. If you rather he rubs your booty then tell him he has to rub your booty first! And don't hold it over him like some sort of prize to be earned. Don't be afraid to ask him to let you touch him or for him to do something else to you. It will be fun and awkward and eventually great.

    • I want to clarify that I assumed that you want to get physical since you made a point to mention that it felt good. That is why I think communication is the issue not the physical attraction.

  • He has to respect when your ready to have sex or to get sexual. There's just no going around it. I hate some of the answers who practically suggest he "deserves" it because it's been 6 month. It doesn't matter if it's a year or two years, he still has to wait when your ready to have sex or to do thins that are sexual. If he continues this behavior, then he's one of those rare guys who are willing to wait as long as half a year or more to get what they want. I'd leave him if he doesn't control himself.

    Another thing is, he could honestly be a good guy and just be intimidated and just plain horny to want to do something like that. But the thing is, in my experience when I first did this with my ex, I asked her first. I thought it was respectful and genuine to show that I was willing to wait when she was ready. I feel he should do the same thing. So, I really don't like this guy.

    • Another thing people forget, or even forget to read, is that you mention that you enjoy it. So it's obviously not an issue that your not sexual, but rather than your not fully ready to venture down that road. That's why I think it's unethical for someone else to assume you "should" be doing it after 6 months when your obviously different.

Most Helpful Girls

  • are you sure that your 18-24 cause you sound like a scared 13 year old wait no I know 13 year old these days aren't even this scared...you've been with the guy for 6mos ummm yeah he's a guy and he's going to look at your boobs, get a life this is normal, all guys like breasts, and after 6mos oh heck even I would be trying to get some boob action LOL...

    • Your telling a girl to get a life? It's her decision when she's ready to be sexual, and he needs to respect that. Not push her to it. Not everyone is sexually the same. I'm a guy and I didn't go pouncing my ex's to cop a feel.

  • Well, he's a horny guy and can't seem to control himself. Cover yourself up. But I am curious though, how does he handle this? I mean guys need physical contact with girls doesn't have to be sex but I mean like intimate touch, kiss hugs. Do you guys do that?

    • LOL, that's a good question. Also might explain his behavior. She might be the greatest tease and not even know it.

  • Are you mormon or amish or something lol...

    The dude is going to touch you because everyone is horny and has sex.

    Its a part of life.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 3

  • So you're an adult with a boy friend of 6 months, and you're finding discomfort in the fact he wants to touch your breasts...Are you serious?

    "I've heard that "If you give them a little ""taste'', they'll just come running back for more."... This scares me"

    Why does it scare you? He's your god damn boyfriend, ofc he'll wanna touch you everywhere and you should want him to aswell. The fact he's still with you after 6 months without any physical action shows you mean a lot to him, if he meant anything to you then touching your breasts wouldn't be an issue.

  • If you've been together for 6 months I'm personally surprised you two haven't ripped off all your clothes and had amazing passionate sex already. If you two are uncomfortable with physical affection then I guess that's just how it is for you. In his defense though, he's a guy. Guys are gonna look down your top and all kinds of stuff like that because its the nature of the human male unless he's gay, or in rare cases, extremely shy. This sounds like an insecurity issue you have to work out for yourself considering he wants physical affection and you appear not to.

  • I would say that if you aren't ready, you aren't. Now, it's not as if he's a pig. He seems to desire to respect your wishes, but after that long, most men would be very anxious. I'm NOT saying it's your fault, or that you should be ashamed, but neither should he. I mean, the "raging hormones" stuff ain't just an excuse. It's totally true. For some people, it'll be downright painful to ignore it. I know that if I dated a girl for that long, I'd be very eager to "further" the relationship. I must ask you: how do you feel about him in general? Are you attracted to him? Do you see your relationship going anywhere (not talking about sex)? It seems as though, based on both what you described, and your phrasing, that you're not very interested in him, both sexually and romantically. And if he just can't resist longer, it might not work out. Just think long and hard about what this relationship means to you.

  • you need to let him f*** the living daylights out of you. I'm serious. this guy is hurting. 6 months? that's is to long. if you don't f*** him then I will.

    • She's right you know....in theory.

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