This is America...
This is like telling tall people, "you're tall." There is no confusion on where a person is, but the implication that "in America, you do this, therefore everyone has to be the same" is a falsity. Even among fellow Americans, people can live quite differently from one another. For some, there is this expectation that someone who comes here should change every single thing about themselves, lose their identity, forget about their entire history/culture to "become American." Could you do that? Could you forget everything you grew up with, ditch all the foods you grew up eating, change who you are because some random told you, you should?
Where are you from...no really...
When you ask someone where they are from and they say, they were born in like Chicago...that secondary, no really, where are you really from is quite rude. Chicago. It's like these people can't fathom that anyone with a certain skin tone can be just as American as they are, born and raised. It's different if you're inquiring about their cultural background and such, but denying that they could ever possibly be born on the same soil---is stupid.
No, you're not from there, you can't be...
It's news to you that everyone from a certain place can only look the one way because when you say, you actually are from xyz, they point to your looks and literally explain to you in many stereotypical phrases, how it's impossible that you can be from that place. What's worse is they keep on explaining as if it's going to magically change your origin story.
What about me...
Even as I write this, there is someone who didn't read a word of it, who I can all but guarantee started writing a one upsmanship comment when s/he saw the title of this, about how they too are much more oppressed, or minorities can be racists too (yes they can), or immigrants aren't always this or that. Every single time someone merely talks about racism or oppression or discrimination, they make the story somehow all about them as if you pointed a finger and said to them personally, you are a racist or oppress people because you're not a minority or an immigrant. If you aren't one of those people, why on earth are you MORE upset that people are calling out those specific people, then the belief that if someone merely talks about what they have personally gone through or are dealing with in regards to actual racists, that they are somehow talking about you personally.
This is "2017," why are you still complaining...
This is the point at which most minorities, if they didn't already believe this, know that the idea of privilege does exist because only someone who doesn't have to deal with racism, oppression, discrimination, etc, would think that racism is over, or discrimination no longer exists because we have laws that supposedly protect minorities from such abuses. Racism is alive and well unfortunately, and most minorities would like nothing better than to be able to live their lives free of people who judge them by the color of their skin, or to always be judged on equal footing with their peers by their merits, or to not have someone dismiss them point blank because of a name or upon first sight as being bad or a terrible person in some way, and yet here we are.
Kosic..Karsic...Causic-ko...I'll just call you Jim
Pronouncing last names can be difficult when you aren't from someone's culture. Few, don't get that, however, it is extremely disrespectful to just decide you refuse to learn someone's name as a teacher, a boss, a co-worker, a friend who will see them all the time, because to you, that seems all to inconvenient to make the slightest effort to learn--and yet these people learn everyone else's name and call them by their first/last name. My friend's boss sent her an email with her name misspelled informing her that from that day forward, it was "going to be" spelled that way on all her paperwork because he couldn't remember how to spell it otherwise and it was just easier that way. Yup. Show people the same respect, you show others plain and simple. You don't get to decide what someone's name will be for them.
I don't see color
True if you're blind, ridiculous and patronizing, if you're not. People only ever utter the phrase, "I don't see color," to those of color. They think it makes them sound like these enlightened and sooo not racist, people, but there is such ignorance in that phrase. People of color don't want you to pretend they don't exist and that there aren't actually cultural, skin tone, or racial differences between you because that is ignoring the reality of the world everyone lives in. They would only like not to be treated as less/worse than, simply because of that skin color.
Oh my God, say something in...come on...say something
That moment when people assume just because you look like you're from somewhere or you are from somewhere, that you are fluent in that language. They then expect you to say something in that language and translate for them and teach them how to speak it within 5 minutes of meeting you. When or if you decline either because you can't or don't want to speak it, they get so incredibly offended...like how dare you not entertain us. How dare you not be able to speak the language...and you look like that...or why don't you want to translate this 100th time for us, isn't that why you speak another language. Again, show respect. Unless it is a persons job to translate, they don't work for you and are in no way obligated to speak another language because you find it cute or entertaining.
Why can't I say that...
There are certain things a person can say to a really good friend and vice versa, that they know would be totally inappropriate elsewhere, but you know your friends and they know you, and you know you/they aren't going to be offended because you know them, and there is a mutual respect that says, what you're saying is not hurtful and if it were to go there, they'd respect you enough not to keep saying those things. This is every group of people on earth: the religious, minorities, not minorities, friends, political groups, your classmates at your school, etc.
Not so when someone is on the outside of any of those groups. Certain words and phrases have a very charged history behind them. If someone says you can't say it, respect that because you also have the knowledge that in your own life, certain people can say some things to you that you wouldn't allow others to because you don't know where they are coming from, or what's behind it, or if they are racist, sexist, harassing you, or whatever. ALSO KNOW that just because a person is of a certain race/culture/ethnic group, that they don't all approve of such words just because they are apart of that group and some use them. Please do not assume or assume it's okay because one person said you could use certain words and phrases with them because they are your friend.
I thought all your people were...
A stereotype is a stereotype for a reason. You should not assume that because a person is of a certain race or country, they automatically think, feel, act, or do certain things. People are individuals and should be treated as such.
Look at me, I'm a minority because I...
There are people that actually think because they can hold chopsticks correctly, or know exactly three Spanish phrases, or know every lyric to a rap song, or have one Arab friend, that suddenly they know, are, can be, or totally understand what it means to be a minority or immigrant. They assume because of these things that they are somehow allotted certain rights and privileges to do and say and act how they want within certain groups or to their friends about these groups because they feel they are somehow the exact same. Learning about, and respecting another culture or race is great--and encouraged---but assuming that because you've learned a few things, that you 100% know, or worse, can speak for another culture/race that is not your own, is a massive error in judgment. A culture or race is not a skin you can just pick up and throw on. Wearing your hair/clothing/talking a certain way doesn't make you that race/culture.
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