Happy Saint Patricks Day Whether You're Irish or Just Wish You Were!

Drunkenness, violence, destruction of property. ..are these what we think of, when we think of the Irish? So wondered ole Kenny Broklestein on The Simpsons.

Happy Saint Patricks Day Whether You're Irish or Just Wish You Were!

Today is the one day of the year that being Irish has some decent international cred for some reason. As an Irish man I've no idea why this is so. Perhaps like Halloween, we simply had to give it to America before they perfected it and gave it back to the world.

So a couple of points on this most green of days.

1) It's paddy, not patty.

Patty is either a burger, or Barts auntie. It is not an Irish person of any stripe. Paddy is short for Padraig which is irish for Patrick. It's got nothing to do with rice fields though Ireland is ridiculously wet.

2) America does it better.

Ever since we got tv signals we've eyed American parades with silent begrudging envy because our parades SUCK. It's not because we don't have gays or Puerto Ricans. It's because we are shit at this sort of thing but misplaced national pride prevents us from addressing the problem and fixing it. If you have the chance to spend Patricks day in America or Ireland, go state side.

3) It's not about the alcohol.

We drink like this all the time. Or most of it anyway. We are used to it. For the most part, don't try to keep up. It's not a sport for beginners.

4) The idea of picking on kids who aren't wearing green didn't start with us.

That's your thing.

5) Patrick wasn't Irish.

He was an unwilling immigrant. We accepted him, adopted him, monetised the fuck out of him. That's how you deal with immigrants. Force them to better the country even if they're dead. If we'd kicked up a stink and sent poor Paddy home to Wales, we'd be the poorer for it. And if America had sent all the Paddy's packing, you'd have lost half your police force at a stroke.

So on this day, try to remember the real lessons of the Irish diaspora... make them work hard and exploit them to better your country. It worked for us America, it can work for you too!

Happy Saint Patricks Day Whether You're Irish or Just Wish You Were!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Happy Belated St. Patrick's day you stubborn mick.

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What Girls Said 15

  • I'm not Irish but hey, Happy St. Patty's day! Don't drink too much :)

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  • Happy St. Paddy's Day!

    🍀🍀🍀🍀

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  • I'm English but have Irish blood in me, and it frustrates me that everyone outside of the UK calls it PATTYS day, like wtf it ain't no burger day lol

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  • I spent St, Patricks day watching an Incredible Hulk marathon Lol, that is what America had to offer on TV for this that is outside of parades or played out cartoons. We did barbecue though and ate chips and drank but that is pretty much it. I like Ireland though from what I see on travel shows and some famous people that came from there. I love the color hair and the accent, America can be so boring at times, what we celebrate is so questionable when compared to other countries that have valid reasoning behind their personal holidays.

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  • I'm irish so we celebrate by having boiled dinner at my parents and everyone comes , sadly i can't make it this year

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  • Thanks! As a some-huge-number-generation Irish, I love this take. Happy St. Paddy's Day! ☘️☘

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  • I wish I can be irish

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  • Them Irish guys though. <3 mama wants! Lol

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  • Happy Saint Patricks Day

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  • Thank you... same to u.

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  • lol patty

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  • i am a proud Canadian

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  • Happy St. Patricks Day

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  • Happy St. Patrick’s Day ☘️💚☘️💚

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  • I love Ireland, been to dublin a few days ago. Came back just a day before st patricks day. The atmosphere is so happy and welcoming. Saw pubs drawing the four leaf clovers on the windows.

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What Guys Said 25

  • Nice, I didn't even know it was Paddy's day.

    Guess I need to get drunk.

    Slainte!

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  • Lol nobody would want to be Irish. They have a reputation for being dumb and they speak in that high pitched tone of voice and say diddleydee potatoes all the time

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    • Kindness forbids me from commenting on our antipodean member. Let's just be grateful he worked out how to use the computer without killing himself.

  • Thanks for exposing the difference between the real thing, and the inexplicable Plastic Paddy phenomenon that takes over the western world on this occasion...

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  • Irish / Scots descent from my ( absent ) fathers side. Ireland's best export IMHO is the hilarious sitcom , Father Ted ... hence my feckin' username.

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  • more importantly Ireland beat England in the 6 nations (rugby) today its been a great day for being Irish

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  • I am.
    Patrick was a minor Roman Bishop from Britannia who decided to subject himself to capture and enslavement in an effort to convert Hibernia (Ireland) from Paganism to Christianity. While captive of the "Alpha" King on the island, Patrick got his ear and converted the King to Christianity. In time, the King freed Patrick, who returned home. But because it was his calling, Patrick could not stay away and returned to Hibernia in pursuit of his evangelistic mission... to discover that the "Alpha" King had done his work for him and converted the entire island. Patrick was one of a few Saints who was not martyred. Patrick's and Valentine's (who WAS martyred) are the only Saints days celebrated all over the world but few people have a clue who they were and what they did.

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  • Everyone is Irish on St. Patrick's Day.

    Happy St. Patty's day, everyone!!!

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  • Something special has happened for me every Saint Patricks Day and this one is no different. Happy Saint Patricks Day

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  • I'm Irish... Let's party! :D

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  • Happy st. hangovers day tomorrow

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  • I can be Irish for a day...

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  • Great take.

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  • I'm not Irish and definetly don't wish I was

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  • Very interesting

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  • when is it

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  • Great myTake

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  • I'm all for it

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  • I'm fine

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  • I AM SCOTTISH DOES THAT COUNT I LOVE THE IRISH

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  • Happy Saint Patricks Day

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