Guys always make plans but never follow through...whats up with that?

me and this guy have been talking and he said he "needs to chill with me" and "wishes he didn't have so much work so he could see me". well I took the initiative on a Friday night and text him if he wanted to hang out. he text me where I was because he usually picks me up and I told him but he didn't reply after that. this is the SECOND time he did this.

what does he mean by all this? I mean he's the one that said he wanted to see me. should I be mad at him because the last time he did this he had a football game the next day and he said he slept off? should I confront him about it? and guys do you have an idea of why he does this?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm going a bit through the same thing... my best guess would be for YOU to be the one that is unavailable now. It may be difficult to do, but hit him back with his same game. Next time he asks you where you are, don't even reply. Let him keep saying that you need to chill but ignore it and finally when he starts getting desperate about it, YOU TELL him you are gonna do something.

    • Omg I was just thinking the same thing!! I'm gonna try and play hard to get now because I'm normally not like this with he makes me want him so much lol but now the tables are about to be turned! :)

    • Show All
    • Just reply something like nothing or don't reply at all. :P

    • hey ... I got the same issue... just report back what works.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • he's being hot/cold...if you plan something and he bails for whatever reason, let him plan the next get-together...he has a time management problem for the relationship, and it's not a high priority, obviously


What Girls Said 2

  • I would confront. When I confronted my guy he took me out and wanted to hang out the next days, etc. You want to stand firm with it, and if it happens again you just bring it up.

  • I went through the same thing recently. We spent a whole weekend together back about a month ago and he has made plans with me 4 times and I once. When the day we had plans arrives he 3 times had an excuse, or not called, or try to make a plan for dinner after I send him a text calling him a flake around 8pm. I told him it was too late and that I made other plans.

    I honestly feel like he is trying to make me unavailable to every other guy by making plans first then only following through when it is a convenience for him. This is the only problem I have with him, but its sort of a big deal. I have let him known the first time this happened that it bothered me. I said, why make plans to hang out with me if you are not going to anyways? He was stumped and apologized and said he was really busy going to work and remodeling his place, that this won't last forever and that he would like to see me very soon.

    After calling him a flake a couple days back, he then made plans for the next day to have dinner after he came back from work and the gym. It was 7:45pm and I still haven't heard anything all day, so I finally had enough and told him that I was no longer interested, and that I was done trying to hang out with him to please not call or text me anymore. He replied, "it's a shame, just got out of the gym, why didn't you just called." I asked him, "why make plans for dinner if your not going to be ready until 9pm? Who has dinner that late anyways?" He replied, "what's your problem? I wanted and planned to hang out with you tonight..and you got all drama on me! and that yes dinner is around 9pm."

    It sucks because I really liked him, but enough was enough. I am pretty sure I will not hear from him again, which is not necessarily what I wanted to happen. Why do guys play with our time? I just don't get it...

    • wow what an ass. I'm sorry to hear that. it seems like guys like this don't stay around that much. the guy was talking about in my question just stopped talking to me after this one fight we had then he tried to start talking to me again but I ignored him for some time. thennn when we started making small talk, he tried to hook up with me but I let him down. that's how they are. they are only looking for one thing and if a guy realllyyy likes you, he'll always be available or at least try to be...