Should men be the bread winners?

Should men be the bread winners while the women are at home? Should be shared? Or should it be the women who are the bread winners?
  • Men should be the bread winners.
    Vote A
  • It should be a shared opportunity between both genders.
    Vote B
  • Women should be the bread winners.
    Vote C
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What Guys Said 68

  • The question is would women allow men not to be? The answer is no. Statistically women divorce men who are not bread winners if they marry them at all (which statistically, again, they are not very likely to do). So its not really a matter or who should be the bread winner as who is willing to be and for most of history men where willing to take on that burden because it meant a devoted wife, reproduction, love and respect. Currently men are getting none of those things, women are the ones in absolute control and so if they get married they will absolutely have to be bread winners (while claiming that she does everything because women seem oblivious to all that men contribute (just to hammer home this point, women claim men don't contribute enough yet statistically men actually work slightly more then women when you account for domestic work and paid work AND 80% of all US domestic spending (70% globally) is done by women despite women being responsible for only a third of domestic earnings.) because women will not allow them to be otherwise (again, statistically speaking obviously their are always exceptions). They will also not get any of their previous benefits from doing so thus showing other non married men that they shouldn't marry resulting in fewer marriages, which is what we are seeing. So men "should" be bread winners but only if women are going to give something in return to make the burden worth the effort, otherwise women will have to be the bread winner because the man will refuse to marry to begin with.

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  • Neither man or woman should just sit at home doing nothing. Women have had the excuse of childrearing and historically having less rights than men, which I am not an expert on that subject. Men or women can stay home and not work a job if its in the interests of the couple but at least they should do something at home and I wouldn't think its always the best choice.

    The question pertains more to whether or not men should stay home. there's way more social stigma around them than women doing the same. So not many people really care what women do. Men though shouldn't because its just a waste of time. Having kids is the exception, but in the past there was a significant amount of work to do at home. Today often the one at home just watches tv because everything is conventional and automatized. there's little importance to a home person, not unless they have a home based job.

    Its not to say that the people that do so are bad, its that its bad for them. Its how you get bored, unfit, old and without a feeling of dignity. Men need to be doing something because in my belief men have much more expected of them in terms of duty, responsibility and character. Men doing so will be vilified, pilloried and made to be deppressed.

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    • 14h

      I may have gone past the question.

      Generally, so long as both partners are working and contributing to a significant amount. While the wifes a doctor, the husband should be more than a burger flipper, that's the same reversed. But you won't make an even amount of contributions and the attempt will only be divisive for the couple, let alone unimportant. Today the workforce doesn't prevent people too much from the same opportunities to make money, whereas in the past there may have been gender discrimination that would excuse a woman. But today it doesn't matter who is the bread winner. Even at my most pessimistic attitude, neither man or woman in my opinion will lament their spouse solely on the condition that they make less money because simple love means more than it.

  • Both should share the responsibility equally. I'm not a fan of the idea of working all day while my future wife chills out at home or takes care of the kids. We both need to be working and I don't mean she just has a part time job either. She needs to have a full time job, working 40+ hours a week.

    After all if she wants to go out and buy something or she wants her own savings. She needs to make that money herself. I also think we should have a shared account for expenses. But if she finds things she wants to buy, SHE needs to make that money herself, just as the way I do.

    I'm not just giving her money for anything and I'm only buying her presents on actual holidays.

    That might make it sound as though I'm cheap, but, no, I'm being realistic. I'm not going to make myself poor, simply to make her happy. So many people I work with ACTUALLY complain about this very thing!!

    Also, before anyone says, "Oh, well, you'll never get a girlfriend if you think that way." Seriously, considering the fact that I haven't had a girlfriend in about 17 years and haven't been on a date in about 12 years, (too busy with first college, then work, in case you're wondering,) and I've done just fine so far, do you really think I care. No I don't. If I find a girlfriend who accepts that she's only getting presents on holiday's and that I'm not bending over backwards for her. Then great.

    You want to know who I do buy presents for when ever I see them?

    My nieces and nephew, they're 7, 5, and 1 year old. I buy them presents for when I see them because I only get to see them 2 or 3 times a year.

    But anyway, sorry about my little rant there. :-)

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    • 14h

      just a note, you ladies and your feminism produced this boy. hahahahahahahahahaha!

    • 14h

      @malegender lmfao!!!
      😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

    • 11h

      @malegender It's simply a matter of realistic equality, everyone says they want equality... well, if a girl doesn't like this type of equality, then well, equality isn't truly what she wants.

  • It depends on the couple.

    I think traditional roles state that men should be the breadwinners, whilst the women stay home and that's fine, if a couple are perfectly happy to live that way and the same goes for a couple who want it the other way round or where both work.

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  • My wife and I are traditionalists. I am the bread winner. We like it that way. But really, it should be dependant in each couple. Equal rights!

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    • 20h

      Your kids will come out healthier then child abused kids in child care thanks to both parents working.

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    • 13h

      Recession is coming better hope you are in health industry lol

    • 12h

      @DaMack999 No, I’m in the auto industry. I think I’ll be okay. It’ll slow down, but one thing I’ve learned is people will give up any other expense if it means they get to keep driving, and keep their internet.

  • I think it should be judged by the opportunities. Ideally both should be productive. If a couple finds that one of them should be the breadwinner, it should be decided based on how to get the best opportunities for both. I think it's a little dumb to make them men the breadwinner just because it's the traditional way when the women could've been a way better breadwinner. That is just throwing opportunities away just because you feel good being traditional.

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  • When your children are born, I don't think it should matter. As long as 1 stays at home with the kids & the other brings in the income,... as long as in that kind of setting, you have a good system working for you that you keep that financial balance going,... again I don't think it should matter as long as you straighten that part out as to who is going to do what.

    Once your kids are grown up,... I would say if you want to double your income,... why not both be the bread winners?

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  • Yes & No,

    YES:
    -I'd want her to be independent enough and earning enough of her own so that if anything happened to me she'd NEVER need help from anyone but instead be very safe n settled.

    NO:
    -I'd want to be able to give my beloved the world.. anything n everything she ever wanted all on my own.

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  • It should be about who truly has the gift. The other should assume a supporting role. If this means that the man handles things the old fashioned way, so be it. To hate on tradition simply because it fails to make you feel special is idiocy.

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  • Whoever has the rights has the responsibility. Women now hold all the rights in a relationship so they now have the responsibility in that relationship, women should be the breadwinners by not being so they are having their cake and eating it too, exploiting men, being hypocrites (pick your criticism)

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    • 20h

      Prove what? That women have all the rights in a relationship? Easy.
      Who has what rights in a relationship is a negotiation between the parties involved bargaining with what they offer and how they can punish. Men have no real bargaining chips in this negotiation (they no longer have a monopoly on income or resources, equal pay. they are no longer needed for protection, guns.) Women on the other hand still hold a monopoly on what men want/need. So this negotiation is more of a dictation. Add to that the ultimatum of a break up (which profits women and costs men due to family courts) and you have modern relationships where women have all the rights because they have something to offer but are forcing the responsibilities and the costs of those rights onto men by keeping the power to punish.

  • I say its a negotiation between each couple but there shouldn't be an obligation for either one to do it. I think generally speaking men prefer to be the breadwinner though so it'll trend that way.

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  • I dont think this should be a question of gender. Whatever suits their personalities is what they should go with.

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  • It really does not matter. How much money you earn is not an indication of a persons worth. In a relationship its a team effort. The money and work are shared in a way that works for each relationship.

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  • Women should be the bread winners, then men won't be as hesitant to marry. You don't see Oprah getting married, and for good reason.

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  • All options are just fine, as for me, I would rather work harder if that meant that my wife would raise my children correctly even thought I would feel uncomfortable the other way, I guess that’s about how our society was shaped.

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  • Money doesn't matter in terms who makes the most money, the man just better have a job and be productive.

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  • Women who are good moms are priceless. Women who earn a paycheck are worth the number on the check.

    Seems obvious which is more valuable.

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  • It depends. If there are no children it doesn't matter. While children are young though, yes. The best thing for both the Mother and child is for the baby to be breast-fed - some say "why can't the Dad stay at home" - he has no tits, that's why. Unless you want to feed them shitty powdered milk to benefit yourself.

    They're better off with their Mother than in daycare up until at least 3.5 years old as many studies have shown. The man should be the breadwinner in this stage. Later on once they're school age it doesn't matter.

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  • Sometimes it works to split the work up where one goes to work and one stays home to take care of the kids. But the way things are now it’s hard to get by without both partners earning income

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  • It should be decided between the two. It's not up to us to decide what 2 individuals should do in a relationship, as long as both are heard and treated as equals.

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  • Both should work

    Housewives are a massive turn off

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  • The painful truth is,
    "Bad temper, insolence, and dispute hold sway
    Where the wife supports the husband".

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  • I would never allow my wife to work outside the home.

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  • I mean... who can win the most bread? At the end of the day, that’s the name of the game, as much as I wish it wasn’t. But our society forces us to earn money for what we need rather than wilderness survival like we were designed for. So the gender roles are neutralized some, women are capable of earning more money than their male partner, so in those cases, whoever has the most earning power should logically work a job if only one can. I have a guy who works part time for me, his wife has some big deal job that pays the bills and affords their lifestyle, then he just makes the supplementary “vacation money” that pays for them to go on family trips, buy recreational items, etc. So it seems to work for them, she happens to have more earning power than he does, so she’s the main source of income. Seems like a sweet deal for him from what I know, haha

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  • How is this an issue? Who fucking cares who brings in the most money? As long as both are working there shouldn't be any problem..

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  • Men should be the providers as a general rule but it's not a must.

    But who cares.

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  • I think the man should be the breadwinner.

    Have you ever heard of a relationship failing because the woman wasn't making enough money to give her man the lifestyle he demands? HAHA! I think we would all agree she needs to move on from a guy like that.

    This something women also refuse to give up. They want men to pursue them, to pay for all the dates, and to pop the question when the time is right. Maybe that's because men are better leaders than women. Maybe that's because men who take on this role allow women to be women.

    One thing is for sure, women need to figure out if they truly want be CEOs and work their lives away, or if they want to raise beautiful children and be led by a strong man.

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  • men should be.
    theoretically it shouldn't matter, but in my exp it does

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  • How ugly is society when women aren't raising kids running to work instead.

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    • 14h

      that is why the recent batches of kids are worthless

    • 13h

      You telling me can't get my little newphew to move out his 26. I was his age age I already had 3 kids.

  • Whatever works for the specific couple, thats not a gender issue.

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What Girls Said 28

  • It is up to an individual couple to decide what works for them.

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  • Everyone should be their own breadwinner regardless of gender

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    • 3h

      by that logic, why have a familiy at all if we should just do it for ourselves

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    • 2h

      but sending children to daycare to be raised by strangers, who are preoccupied with 20 other kids is better?
      and isn't it so that parents already get some financial benefits.
      you can work, you just can't expect to have the same living standard on a single wage.
      and what if both parents die?
      maybe im saying this bcs my mom quit her job to be a mother to me and my brother and let our father work his ass off. true we didn't go to vacations that often but at i at least had 1 parent at home. i also had my 1st job at 16 so that probably helped take some pressure off. i didn't pay bill yet but i could buy my own clothes and stuff like that.

    • 2h

      not to mention there's plenty of single moms that do make it work

  • It be nice to live in a society were I could say no but in the real world most women want and need a dominant, alpha male to provide a comfortable life for them and protect them. I've seen family's were the mother earnt more than the father and she'd end up seeing him as less of a man and walk all over him or she'd overly worry and stress out about them trying to make them feel better whilst providing her him and her family.

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    • 20h

      I have seen familys that were happy with the mother making more.

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    • 18h

      @Alice2398
      I was talking about you.

  • I think it's up to each couple and what works for them. If a man is the breadwinner while the woman is at home, great. If it's vise versa, also great. I don't think there should be a set rule on it though.

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  • Well, since my current boyfriend is a high school teacher and I'm aiming for something like putting together mathematical models or doing number stuff in a bank, it's most likely I will earn more money than him.
    I actually quite like that idea, since I hate being dependent on people.
    I have no problem with providing for him, though, since he has plans on dropping the teaching at some point and doing manual (so, poorly paid, but fun for him) work outside, like being a forest ranger.

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  • I don’t see why one should be able to live their dreams, make an impact and a name for themselves while the other one stays at home washing dishes and changing diapers, man or woman.
    So, for me personally, I’d never want to be the only one making money or raising the kids. But it’s really up to the couple to decide what best works for them as long as they are on the same page, everything is okay.

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  • I mean, my boyfriend has a higher ranking and higher paying job than I do but he’s not the “breadwinner.” My boyfriend pays all our bills and the rent but I use my money to buy all our food for the apartment. It’s kind of balanced because I physically cannot spend as much money as him.

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    • 14h

      iv'e never met a woman who "cannot spend as much as him." Just saying

  • Let’s be honest here, for a lot of countries now, families can’t afford to only have one ‘bread winner’ in most cases the mum and dad both have to work, equality at its finest :D

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  • I am a bit old fashioned. I like the idea of being a housewife and taking care of the kids. So, I want my future husband to be the breadwinner.

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  • Personally I think it should be an equal thing. I would not want to make all the money in the house and have my husband lay around but at the same time I wouldn’t want to be like a bottom feeder taking all my husbands money if the roles were revers

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  • I think i would want both of us to work so that we could both stay home when the baby is home for at least a yr, then just work part time at opposite times until school, and then just dueing school and try to be at home as much as possible

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  • What's best and should be done change according to individual circumstances and necessities.

    It feels fairest if both have equal responsibilities, but everyone is different and has different emotional necessities, besides life changes a lot and there are certain circumstances which make impossible for both to be bread winners, so here is where the couple should talk and decide who should be the one. I also feel roles should be flexible and change as external circumstances and personal necessities change.

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  • He can be the bread winner but that doesn't necessarily mean the woman has to stay at home. I prefer to have my own career but I do expect him to be the bread winner.

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  • It's unfortunate that woman are the ones that get pregnant, and breast feed. Kinda puts them on the back foot.

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  • I don’t see why it always has to be either?
    I want us both to have amazing careers & be rich TOGETHERRRR

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  • No. My money is my money and his money is his money. It's not a mans responsibility to take care of another adult.

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    • 3h

      but if that other adult gives him a child he is reaponisble for both of them

  • It should be equal, always. Both should be self sufficient, keep money out of a relationship 👍🏼

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    • 20h

      Sounds wonderful. Except im very successful. Am i supposed to go on vacations by myself while my girl is busting her ass to make $40k?

  • thwy have been for a long time and look what they do with their money. embarrassing

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  • i invited all of u gays to my questions🙂 nobody replies my questions😔🙂

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  • I prefer being equal partners

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  • All I know is I will always be a breadwinner.

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    • 20h

      Good luck finding a man that will be your wife. Lol

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    • 20h

      Lol all I know is if his manly he ain't wearing the dress 👗. Maybe you might be lucky to find feminine guy who knows.

    • 19h

      No duh he wouldn’t wear a dress.

  • If they want to?

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  • I prefer my man making more than me.

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  • Should? Nope they can

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  • It depends on the household and personal beliefs.

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  • Men should be bread winner, crackers winner, spagetti winner, potato winner whether they like it or not😎

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  • It doesn’t make sense for him to be in my situation. I have a much greater earning capacity, why should I stay home and look after our hypothetical children because of what traditional gender roles suggest?

    Also partnerships are a team effort. As long as both parties are making an effort to better the relationship and progress emotionally mentally and financially who cares who is the breadwinner?

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  • I still live in another century ( in my mind haha), where men worked and women were taking care of the house, had children, made food. I like the idea of having children and being a lot with them, while the man is at work

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    • 14h

      I like how folks are thumbs downing you like they are judging you for YOUR choices. Shameful.

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