How do you deal with bullying as an adult?

How do you deal with a bully, in a non violent way? I'm really not trying to fight anyone. I mean I will if I have to but I'd rather not. I just feel like I'm getting too old to not be able to use my words and find a verbal solution.

There was a problem with her friend and we stopped talking which I'm fine with but then she decided take over for what reason I don't really know why. This all started over a group project gone wrong. Had nothing to do with her. Her friend has kinda moved ok on; as has everyone else in the group but she's just still stuck on it.

I just basically need to make it so this ends but try and do it like 2 adults not children on a playground.

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Make a habit of befriending the authority figures in the hierarchy. (Try to be real, sincere, genuine friends with them. Don't just use them, or they'll see through your attempts and pull-away.) Of course, perform well and conduct yourself well, so you don't embarrass them.

    When you have friends in high places, attacking you is suicide.

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  • As far as I'm concerned, most adults are just children with more responsibility. So if someone is so imature they feel the need to bully you, just cut them out of your life. If they feel the need to stalk you and constantly be around you to harass you, that's against the law and you should call the police on them.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • I hate bullys and girls can be so nasty, stubborn and bitchy

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  • Feel confident in yourself and tell her to go fuck herself if she tries you again. When you feel and act confident, bullies don't try you. They prey on the weak and those who don't talk back to them.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 19

  • Childish behaviour does not end in the playground and you'll have to deal with it throughout your life from all ages and both sexes .
    As much as you can, ignore it, take the higher moral ground, be welcoming and deescalate as much as possible. Unfortunately, some take that as licence to escalate and be worse so at some point you may need to at least try and appeal to their sane side.

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  • Bullies are toxic people them are the ones
    who like to trigger our buttons and set us off
    the suggestion is to move them out of our life's
    if someone wishes to bully me i will bring legal
    action against them and bring them to justice
    no matter where they are if they are at work place
    you can still bring one to justice.

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  • If it's not physical bullying but verbal, just do this. Whatever she says just make a joke about it, If she insults your looks or intelligence, or whatever she does, just make a joke about it. It may take some time, but she'll stop it if she sees that it's not bothering you.
    If it's some other kind of bullying, sorry can't help you with that.

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  • Wit and humor. If you have an audience, embarrass the bully. It’s easier said than done, and the opportunity may not present itself immediately, but it’s the most effective way to deal with a bully when physical means aren’t an option.

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  • I ignore it and escape the situation or try to 'discipline' the bully. I was bullied as a child by my dad. I was quite appy as a kid but when I returned home after leaving for a while u was like...

    "wait... this isn't right"

    I do have a tendancy to 'bully'back nowadays in non domestic situations. But I am quite jovial and people who act anti social tie their own rope before I do that.

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  • Tell them to, "fuck off." Then just walk away. If they speak as you walk away, ignore them as they no longer exist and continue walking away.

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  • Depends on the type of bully. Micromanaging, know-it-all boss? Malicious compliance and a paper trail. Most others can be ignored. Living well is the best form of revenge.

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  • Don't know i always stand up and fight even if i am not the strongest.

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  • I just ignore them. They'll soon get the message. Hopefully.

    Simples...

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  • Let her take over and agree with her, don't disagree. Then she has nothing to go at …..

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  • I get inside their head and find their motive as to why they feel the need to put me down. It’s usually projected insecurities or deeply rooted issues onset from adolescence. After I find their motive and insecurity, I exploit it and utterly humiliate them exposing then to themselves and everyone around them. Shit is chess, not checkers. No confident well rounded individual bullies others for no reason. There’s always a reason why they feel the need to irrationally make themselves feel better than you. Find that reason and shut them down mentally with sound logic and reasoning. If you can do that, I can guarantee you that they will think twice the next time they try and bully another person.

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    • That's honestly just a fantasy. A nice idea in theory, but in reality it doesn't quite work that way, and it's much easier to just not have that person in your life.

    • Certain environments put you in a position in which you learn. Call it whatever you want to though.

  • Well. i won't back gonna stand my ground. U can look me up at the gates of hell but I won't back down gonna stand ground. May he rest in peace

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  • Well, mostly, I DON'T do it in a nonviolent way. I'm GOOD at violence, or at least the threat of it. And bullies almost always stop when confronted with an actual threat. It's contrary to the script they have in their head...

    To be fair, I'm a guy, so I'm socialized differently. Also, I'm a sociopath and a veteran (20 years, now retired). So violence is the top tool in my toolbox; I have to reach past it to get at the other tools. Since none of that applies to you, you need to find a different way. but yeah, adults DO use violence and the threat of violence as a tool to end bullying. Because it's effective.

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  • If it’s online block them
    Nobody has time to argue.

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    • It's not online it's just snarky remarks as she walks pass and stuff like that. It's just so petty. I have to see her friend but she just seems to always be around and doing the most.

    • Yeah it’s shitty

  • How is this bullying manifesting itself?

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  • Like everything in my life, laugh it off

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  • A knife

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  • By bullying them back. Bully the bullies

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  • Sue the bullies.

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What Girls Said 8

  • I took mine to court, but it was an extreme situation where the girl had called/texted me over 200 times, used tons of fake numbers, made a really bad post about me on social media, and even used her bfs phone (a good friend of mine) to try and alienate me from him.

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  • Report them. Bullying is illegal in many states I’m pretty sure. 🤔 Harassment is definitely illegal tho

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  • Honestly I have no idea because I never been in that situation in my life but if I met one I guess I will just walk away

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  • Try to leave then make them hit you so you don't catch a charge

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  • Tell her to F Off. Then Move on life to short for that.

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  • But.. Violence is always the answer

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  • By fighting back. I'm 4'10 and nobody gives me shit because they know I'm not worth the effort.

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  • I just kinda tell them I will do what I think is best for me and ignore them. I do not think they know even know I am putting them aside which is good.

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