Is it selfish to do a selfless deed for the sole purpose of making yourself feel good?
- It's always bad
- It's always good
- It's usually bad
- It's usually good
- It's as much bad as it is good and vice versa
- It's neither good nor bad
Most Helpful Girls
It would depend on if you are an altruistic person or not. A selfish act to an altruistic person is usually regarded as bad. However, it becomes understandable if the selfish act is to protect yourself from a taker in a relationship, where you choose your own mental health over the other person, whether they be parent, sibling, partner, coworker, or someone else, by not giving to them anymore.
To a selfish person, being selfish wouldn't be regarded as bad, because they exist on a different plane, where it's every person for themselves. Others are competition, not friends, and to keep them from getting ahead they never give anything away. This is an extreme example, where a person is chronically selfish, rather than a particular instance when someone is selfish. When people are selfish, I think they switch back to a mode that is better suited for our earlier levels of existence, where choices are based on survival and self-preservation.
Being selfish is not a virtue. The fact that it exists is proof that as much as we spout good deeds and works, we remain very much grounded in our human faults and animal instincts. We do our best to fight it, but we daily make selfish choices. All we can do is recognize when we are driven to do something that helps us rather than the group, and consciously change the pattern.
I think it's ballanced. I'm quite the selfish and realist type while my mom is supportive and optimistic. She wants to help everyone and give advices too, since people also ask her for help sometimes, than if something wrong happens than they blame her and than she comes complainin about it with me.
If something doesn't concern me than I have nothing to do with it, because if I give any opinion, than the work behind it will be put on my back. It works just fine for me.
Most Helpful Guys
There are 2 ways I view the term 'selfishness'
In my opinion, it's never bad to be selfish, to think of yourself first before others, because other people do not own you as you do not own other people. I believe that's self-love.
1. I give, I love, I show affection and interest to the only people who would do the same for me, so we would have mutual profits. And yes, that is selfish as well, but is it bad? I don't think so. I do not have enough time and energy to take care of the whole world. It's a better investment for me to care for a few people who care for me back.
2. Secondly, I believe that selfishness is a failure to understand other people differentiations, or worse, not even try to understand.
Selfishness is bad when it results in harm (screwing over other people for personal gain), just as selflessness is bad when it results in harm i. e. when you let people hurt you.