How do I get him to pop the question?

My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over four years now. He and I are great about everything but lately I can't help but want to settle down already. We have been together for just so long and I honestly want a larger commitment than just boyfriend and girlfriend. I want to be his wife and have his child and live with him. Take care of him and his needs and just play that role. I know he loves me, I know he plans on marrying me but I don't feel like waiting around for it to happen. How do I get him to pop the question sooner?

I know that I am young and so is he(20) but I feel like I have lived my life to the full extent. I have partied, had my fun, traveled enough. I can't imagine anything that would make me happier than just waking up next to him every morning instead of having to sneak out of my home so I can cuddle up in his bed. I just want to be his wife, have his child & be a family. Most girls dream of being doctors, teachers, I want to be his. Completely. I've known him since 6th grade. I just can't wait
much more. I am willing to give it two more years just so he can finish some things up in school and well by that time I would be way done with school. I'd have a great paying job and we've been saving up. I don't know, I know I am inpatient but I can't help it.


Most Helpful Girl

  • You initiate this conversation. You tell him what you want & see what he says. If NO, then it's your choice to stay or not. Don't wait for him to pop the q because he might not ever :)

    • Did he pop the question? :)

    • He gave me a lavish promise ring. His promise was the he would love me for the rest of his life and would marry me as soon as we were done with school. I couldn't be happier. I think I just needed a little more reassurance from him and I got that now. Though I wish he wouldn't have spent so much on the ring. It is much to extravagant for a promise ring! But I am not complaining. I love him.

    • Congratulations! :)

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What Guys Said 3

  • Is he around your age (19)? If so, even though this has been a long committed relationship, this is still relatively early for most men to even consider marriage. I wouldn't feel that it's fair to pressure him until you're done college and working, and he's in the same situation, there's no rush for all that other stuff enjoy your youth.

    • just be patient till you and he are done school, seriously there's no rush, why not live together why do you have to sneak out?

    • My parents are extremely over protective and controlling. Typical Hispanic type people that don't believe in affording me the freedoms of girls my age. I'm 19, and because they support me, I have to follow their rules. Things like my curfew being 9 no boys w.o. supervision and what not. And as for just moving out with him, he and I have both agreed on moving into a small house instead of an apt. only we have to build our credit first. So that is just a matter of time.

  • You can't force him, its as simple as that. He isn't ready yet(financially he says but he might not be ready emotionally aswell)

    If you want the next thing, move in together instaid as that will change plenty(even if your already there a lot, its still different)

  • "How do I get him to pop the question?"

    You don't. Plain and simple. Manipulating him is not the way.

    If it's not his idea then it isn't genuine.

    Of course, you can be unconventional and pop the question yourself...


What Girls Said 3

  • personally, if I were him I'd run a mile after reading this. this is precisely why guys are scared off by marriage - your question makes it seem like his life is flashing before his eyes.

    you're far too young to get married, you'll both change so much before you're even 30, why the hurry to "just play that role" be patient and let him see that he wants it too, in his own time.

    "he plans on marrying me but I don't feel like waiting around for it to happen. How do I get him to pop the question sooner", you can't force him to do it any sooner - unless you ask him yourself, so why haven't YOU proposed to him yet?

    Seriously there is no rush to get married these days, even if you were pregnant. Wouldn't you rather use the wedding money to have a fabulous cruise/holiday instead and really cement your love, maybe planning that would keep you occupied for a while? Just a suggestion, also there's nothing wrong with being boyfriend/girlfriend - a lot of relationships turn sour after the wedding - something changes.

    you have your whole lives ahead of you, if you're that sure of each other then there is no rush at all.

  • good for you, a timesale is great to keep perspective. you sound like a solid couple, life is long with the right choices. At 20 there's no way that you're not going to change, I totally understand that you've lived to the max - so far. there are so many adventures for you both to have together before you really settle down to the family thing

    best wishes x

  • You just can't! He'll propose whenever he's ready! If you can't wait, just ask him yourself.

    But he probably thinks you guys are too young to get married - and he'd be right.

    • Well I kind of ask all the time teasingly and he just says that we would already be married if he had the money for it. What is that suppose to mean?

    • Marrige would not change anything in our relationship. I do everything a wife is suppose to do, only we live separately. I support myself, as does he, but we share our expenses. The only thing that would change it our living situation which would make things a lot easier on both of us because we waste so much gas going to see one another. As for age, as a married couple we can do everything he still wants to do together. Age is not an issue here.

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