Why do people think that having a black friend or spouse or mixed kids excuses their racism?

I said I would never talk about race or politics here but I swear I think sometimes people associate with one black person or get involved with one black person just to be able to hide behind that. I went to high school with a girl that used to say horrible things about our female black classmates. Then she would always say "but I don't mean you and plus your mom is white anyway". I guess I wasn't supposed to be offended because my mom is white evwn though I have a black father and my skin is brown ๐Ÿ˜‚. And what made it worse is that she loved black guys! She did not date anything but black guys. I think she even has a couple kids by one. Which I'm sure makes her feel even more comfortable saying the things she says. Even my racist Nonna will tell people that she has black grandchildren but refer to us as mutts and treat us different than she treats my all white cousins. I'm here to tell you, you don't get a pass to be a racist POS because you know someone black or a POC. I hope we do better in 2021 or we are doomed.
Why do people think that having a black friend or spouse or mixed kids excuses their racism?
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