The Female Experience

QuestionMan

In my quest to understand women I have interacted with as many women as I could both in real life and on GAG. In order to fully understand women however, you must be a woman, just like in order to understand men you must be a man. Since a man cannot become a woman, you must be born one, my next best bet was creating a female account on GAG.

Here is what I've learned from both my personal interactions with women as well as my experiences with using a fake female account on GAG.

1) There are a lot of horny guys out there that can’t control themselves.

The Female Experience

It only took 10 minutes of responding to questions when I got 5 messages from guys saying how beautiful I was. At first I didn’t mind since I thought “What the heck it’s just 5 guys”. On the next day there were 10 messages. These ones were far worse than the previous. Here guys explicitly stated how turned on they were.

Perhaps since I am a heterosexual man that it contributed to my repulsion to these messages but I doubt that most women would be interested in guys posting several times “I like your boobs”.

I called out a couple of them since I couldn’t reply to all of them due to some glitch in the messaging system.

I was actually able to get through to some of the guys which I see as a win.

That’s why I think women should be talking back to these guys since they will keep doing it to other women if no one calls them out on their behaviour.


Personally this was a really big surprise to me. I kept hearing from girls that they’re only approached by these arrogant horny guys and I thought to myself “well I’m not like them, I can control my urges and I don’t personally know anyone that acts that way”. To me its common sense that girls don’t like it when you act horny. I learned that from my first rejection, I can still remember it vividly. I’ve told several Gagers that this type of behavior is unacceptable but they didn’t believe me, thinking that I was just some virgin or someone trying to screw up their chances when in reality I was just trying to help.

One guy even sent me a picture of his penis. That really made me sick to my stomach and want to throw up. If I had any doubt in my mind that I was straight it was immediately gone after that picture.

2) Some things are better received when said by a woman rather than a man

By having a woman tell a guy that he’s acting like a pervert it gives him more reason to change his ways than if a man said it. Women are also better received when they are compassionate since no one doubts their intentions. If a guy is nice to a girl, people will automatically assume that he wants to sleep with her.

The Female Experience

If a guy is overly nice to another guy, he may be labeled as gay. That isn’t always the case. Guys can genuinely care for another human being just as any woman can. It doesn’t make us pussies, quite the contrary it makes us emotionally mature.

The Female Experience
About 2 years ago, a police office bought shoes for a homeless man. When I first read the story it really made me happy to see someone do that for someone else with no benefit to themself.

3) It is really nice to be messaged first

The Female Experience

As someone that has been unwillingly categorized as an alpha by my peers it gets really annoying to be the one in charge. I always have to message everyone first, be they male or female. It is very rare that people message me first and that’s usually only when they need something. Perhaps it’s because I care more or because many of my friends have as much energy as Jeb Bush that I’m the one always planning everything.

When I got the female account it felt nice to have people message me first. With a couple of people I actually had decent conversations with. I could do my own thing and people would message me without me lifting a finger. It’s a really nice feeling compared to what I’m used to. I actually encourage people in real life to message me first but sadly that almost never happens.

There needs to be a balance of who messages whom first. Otherwise, you’re creating a relationship where one chases and the other plays hard to get which in all honesty very few people actually like.

4) Most women won’t approach men because they don’t have to

The Female Experience

Since women are on average 10 times less horny than men they don’t have to worry about approaching guys since there will always be one with enough balls to approach them. This doesn’t guarantee quality, quite the contrary most guys that approach are rejected since they don’t meet a woman’s standards. Women can approach men and some do but it makes them appear desperate (to some) since they’re unwilling to wait. Even though logically it would make a lot more sense for women to approach men since they’d have a higher success rate and be more likely to be with someone they like rather than just picking from guys that approach them. Most women however, will not change since it’s easier to choose from what’s available then to seek elsewhere and risk rejection.

5) Whining about being a virgin is the most unattractive thing out there

The Female Experience

Although I couldn’t fully immerse myself into the thought process of a woman, I tried really hard to picture how I would react if I was a woman. What I realized is that this has got to be the most pathetic lot out there. C’mon do they really expect a hot chick to give them a courtesy fuck just because their horny. What do they have to offer to the woman? Nothing!!! They’re usually losers with no goals in life and all they care about is getting laid. At the same time however, they make great clients for prostitutes even though that only makes their life worse.


The things I couldn’t account for in my experiment were women’s sex drives and what it’s like to have a period. Those are things I could not imitate since I do not find men attractive and I’ve never experienced a period.

I hope you found myTake informative and interesting.

Have a nice day :)

The Female Experience
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Spirit_Is_Free
    Great take - A bit ethically unsound but your intentions have been good so while not condoning it, I don't condemn it - It has been clear to me for a while that possibly the most overexposed group here (excuse the pun) is young women and the actions of a few men are affecting the majority of men. Decent guys are reluctant to approach girls/women on this site and others like it even on a platonic basis for fear of being labelled thirsty or worse.
    I can see this take developing into a gender behaviour debate. I don't condemn all male behaviour or condone all female behaviour but some of your points are crystal clear. Interesting point about how female and male advice is being accepted, I have noticed that a little bit sometimes when I give sensitive advice, people seem almost surprised and if a girl/woman is blunt, she is a ball breaker.
    I honestly not a 100% sure how this plays out but I think more and more people just be themselves then the gender/race/class/faith etc stereotypes fall away. Fingers crossed that will happen but if it does, I am not sure when. I for one will not be holding my breath.
    Is this still revelant?
    • I understand that my methods were "morally flexible" to say the least but I saw no other way to immerse myself into female thought.
      I'm also not crazy enough to do this
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PMdzJHl__k

      I agree with you on the most part. I however do condemn certain male and female behaviours since I see them as unacceptable. In the case of men, acting like a horny pervert does no one any good it only leads to depression. As for females, acting like entitled princesses is also something society should look down upon.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Horny_Girl
    Cool experiment and it looks like it was eye opening for you, hopefully other guys can take note! Desperation is anything but attractive, let alone conversation enticing.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Sixgun77

      Question: we know desperation is a turnoff and confidence is a turnoff. So how do you purpose fixing the cycle? Guy has to keep asking tons of girls out before he gets one date. All those rejections add up and erode confidence, further reducing the chance of even getting a first date. Feedback loop ensues, consistently making someone me desperate and less and less confident. How do we fix this when dating is literally a numbers game for a lot of us? This isn't an attack (in case it comes pig that way in text), I genuinely want to know.

    • @Sixgun77 you're supposed to not get more desperate, pretty much.

    • Sixgun77

      @ThisDudeHere sage advice indeed

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What Girls & Guys Said

915
  • Chief16
    Mind you, I always wish they stop telling men what to do,
    stormidayz33.files.wordpress.com/.../...edfile.jpg
    • Can you provide an example?

    • There was a similar one with a guy saying women should date Indian men.
      www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a25851-10-reasons-why-white-women-should-date-indian-men-asian-not-native

      What's your point?

    • Show All
  • Mustachekitteh
    agree 100% on the first part. Normally the dudes stop being creepy once you call them out on it and how stupid they are being.

    Some women are just as horny as dudes. Though yeah it's not that common. Though it's easy to have a really high sex drive with someone you love being with. ^^
    • Thanks :)

    • Sixgun77

      What do you define as "creepy"? Other than immediately starting to talk filthy or sending unsolicited dick pics.

    • @Sixgun77 Saying anything that makes you cringe. So that will be different for each person.

      It's creepy when a dude acts pushy.

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  • aliceinwonderland69
    I think it is great that you are going to such lengths to try to empathise with my gender. I am trying to do the same with yours. However neither of us will ever truly know what it is like to be the other gender.

    I personally like it when guys message me. Also I think it is normal for males to approach if you look at other mammal species. People seem to forget we are just animals. I am a little bit more sympathetic towards the virgins of this world than you are.
    • I don't see virginity as an excuse to act like a horny dog. I never acted that way so I hold people to the same standard.

    • ManOnFire

      @aliceinwonderland69 And to top the cake, most male virgins aren't even the desperate ones. They're usually "shy" or genuinely feel like they should wait.

  • Raymond_Reddington
    the Facebook thing is not true for me, Lizzy. i haven't been Facebook for over a year. i was like, lets check it out one more time. i had 0 notification. not 1 lol. then i deleted my profile because Facebook is useless anyway xD
    • LOL
      Well I get a couple of notifications if I don't check for a week, but the image was meant to emphasize the disparity between the number of messages men receive versus women.

    • yeah i got that xD what i meant was that guy has one notification after a week, and i have zero after a year lol

  • ManOnFire
    It is true that many guys will send a woman messages, yeah. But I have to disagree with the part about things being better received if said by a woman: often times people program themselves to see a woman as right or agree with her just because she's a woman, even if she's not. A guy can say the same thing she said and people aren't as receptive to it not because he's wrong, but because we've already programmed ourselves see his words as having less value as a man. In other words, we bias ourselves based on psychological concepts that a woman is more correct just because she's a woman.

    No.4 is really quite tired to be honest. This subject is talked about sooooo much, and while I do agree that women don't approach because they want to be approached, it's still pretty true that guys aren't having as hard a time as getting laid as we like to think. There are still a lot of easy women out there who give sex to a lot of guys. I won't go on and on like I have with other people here, but yeah that still stands.
    • I guess it is programming you're right

    • ManOnFire

      People have a psychological complex where we think we HAVE to agree with women, say they're right, hear their perspective, or cut them a break just because they're women, or because of "thousands of years of oppression." A lot of people don't realize it but this is true about our thought-processing, yeah. We tend to be less inclined to agree with men out of a stupid idea that doing such injures women in some way, even if he's more right than she is.

      And yeah. Desperate women are very existant. Particularly about relationships. So desperate that they fail at relationships at a far higher rate than men and divorce at a far higher rate.

  • fauchelevent
    I saw 'The Female Experience' being written by a male user and I'm pretty sure I rolled my eyes so hard that I briefly saw my brain and I braced myself for the misogynistic bullshit that I was pretty sure I was gonna see :P So reading an actually interesting article that I can't really disagree with anywhere was pretty cool and I'm pleased about it! The take was chill, dude, well done ;)
    • Thanks :)
      I'm not like most guys.
      I'm thinking of writting one on the Male experience but it will be far more accurate since I actually have sexual urges towards women while I don't have any for men so I feel like that's something that made myTake less credible.

    • *this myTake

  • dipta
    Not all female profiles look like that though.
    Think mainly if the woman is young, and for you to receive "your boobs look good" you actually have to have a picture posted.
    There's condescence against females too. Not everything is rosie pink.
    • The point was to emulate the experience an attractive girl might have in real life as closely as possible. So a GAG account was the best I could do.

    • dipta

      It's fine. I'm just saying that mainly attractive young girls get that kind of response.

  • ArtDent
    Clearly the best way to conduct yourself is to never talk to a woman nor look her in the eye, practice the 1000 yard stare and look through them.
    • Of course not. The whole point of the take was to emphasize that acting horny doesn't work. You have be composed and act respectful.

  • Panay
    I've got similar things from having mainly female friends, you summed it up brilliantly. It upsets me how many guys are just massive dicks, I don't understand how they don't realise how they're perceived when they send dick pics or harrass women, what do they think will happen?
  • thewanderingme
    every man and every woman are their own person, different. so, trying to understand women is pointless. you're better off attempting to understand each woman as she comes along.
    • ... interesting video. the guys backing away are pretty hilarious. I didn't expect that.

    • Every man has traits in common with every other man so I'd assume the same would be for females.
      I'm trying to zero in on those and go from there

    • like I said in my first statement, focus on the individual.

  • SweetHomicidalQueen
    Holy shit that video had me cracking up especially at the "Yo you wanna get married?" "Yes." *silence* "I gotta..." *sits back down.*
  • This_is_my_username
    A standing ovation from me! great Mytake.. i can totally relate on some points.
    take care :)
  • Bluefish
    I agree with you apart from the 5th point. For many older virgins who are men, it makes no difference if they wine or not. If you are an older male virgin then it means you are unattractive to women and will never be selected. Winning is the first phase i think before it gets to more serious issues. For some older virgins they bite the bullet and sleep with an escort like you say but for a lot of them this will never happen (due to pride), so the downhill mental struggle continues. Women will never understand this area anyway as they will always be sleeping with the hot guy who is probably sleeping with many other girls too. But your above points i totally agree with.
    • I agree with you but when someone whines regardless of context they are seen as inferior.
      Women see a guy whine and they think to themselves "Why should I go for this guy when that other guy has his shit together". I doubt women would ever understand the struggles of being a virgin man nor do they need to since they can go for someone better. It's on us men to make ourselves more appealing since we compete for their attention and only after do we decide if we want to sleep with them.

    • Bluefish

      @mytakeowner. It is very hard for a virgin man... espacially for an older virgin man to not wine and very likely he will be seriously depressed too. The guy who has his shit together has peobably been sleeping with women since a younger age and therefore very experienced and so his confidence is of the roof. Women are always going to go for these guys. Its like a boulder going upwards that continiously gets good for these guys and for the older virgin man the boulder is going downwards and can be very difficult to stop. I don't think women intentionally act like that but they are obviously going to be attracted to the confident guy (who has slept with many girls) and it is probably why they don't understand older male virgins (often thinking they shouldn't wine for no reason).

  • the_rake
    tbh these gross horny men mess it up for guys that want to make a genuine approach to a woman. the women have their guards up because they think if you stop to tell her she is attractive or that something is genuinely interesting about her that there is some small chance you might try to assault her or turn creepy.

    at the same time, I can't understand most women's attitudes about this. either they have a real and strong urge for sex - in which case they have need to approach men - or they do not - in which case feminists need to stop with the charade about how women are just as sexual as men are. if the former is true, then more women seriously need to get out of their heads about being seen as a 'slut' or 'easy' or 'desperate' or whatever. if the latter is true, then they need to be a lot more honest.
    • That's a factor I couldn't account for in my experiment since I don't know how horny women are. Statistically men are 10 times more horny so it makes sense for us to approach more often if that were the case. However I have noticed women complaining about not getting a man and not doing anything about it, which leads me to believe that their insecurities have taken a hold of their behaviour.

    • the_rake

      yep and feminists are always the first to state that women are just as sexual as men because they want women to be seen as equally active sexual agents as men as part of the egalitarian agenda for women. I can understand why this is: they do not want women to be relegated to role of passive sexual receptors for biological roles only. but this creates other problems (e. g. false expectations among men who become more sexually aggressive when they are frustrated at how UNsexual a vast majority of women are: this phenomena seems to be excacerbated by pornography, especially the hardcore varieties).

    • To me it doesn't seem like they're comparatively "unsexual" as you say, although maybe a bit less. But it's more like... the things that turn them on are different, and a lot more related to having emotional experiences with someone than actual characteristics of that person (physical or not).

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  • SunsetRose
    This is awesome! I applaude you, sir.
  • skeptic007
    here is the funny part I don't do any of what those guys do
    I stay too myself mostly
  • Zrelthrhaiel
    I think 5 is a bad thing that women have.
    • Can you explain?

    • It should just be treated neutrally as someone sharing a problem it shouldn't be something that comes into the field of attractiveness is what I think?

    • My point was that acting desperate is unattractive. It isn't something that can be seen as neutral.

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  • astrOnaut01
    Who was your female account?
  • Anonymous
    Great Take! But it only confirms what I always suspected. Girls have it better. After all, it's better to have too many admirers than none. Better to have more messages and invitations than you can reply to than to get none. Better to receive too much attention than be completely ignored and invisible everywhere you go. Just being female is practically a form of "celebrity" compared to what males experience. Yes, it comes with more harassment and safety concerns but that is usually the price of celebrity. And all the special treatment - getting into the club for free, your dinner and movie paid for, shorter jail sentences, put in the lifeboat first, etc. - makes up for it. Honestly if God offered me a do-ever as the opposite sex, I'd jump at the chance. Would any girl here say the same?
    • Honestly I'd rather stay a man. Periods gross me out, the idea of being raped or being pregnant is terrifying to me. Plus peing is easier with a dick

  • Anonymous
    I'm sure you are a real catch any woman would be lucky to have you
  • Anonymous
    How about a take on being a straight white male examining your white entitlement and having to check your privilege every morning when you wake up how everything you do is sexist and racist. How white guilt weighs you down and any success is through simply being born a straight white male in the white male patriarchy.
    • I can write about the "benefits" of being White too.
      I've actually been thinking about it.

    • Anonymous

      Actually write about the benefits of being black or female or a black female or how being an Asian student makes it difficult to get a good college place because of how people who dont deserve to be there get a free ride based on gender or sex.

  • Anonymous
    Such horrible take...
  • Anonymous
    What we learned from you was that you are a pathetic catfish who likes to pretend he's a girl online to flirt with males and potentially get dick pics. Come out of the closet, you will be happier.

    Stop calling other guys horny perverts for their natural sexual interest in the opposite sex. You are part of the fucking anti-male shaming in our society.

    • I can control my urges why can't you?
      I also know how to act respectfully towards women and that's what gets them interested in me.

    • Anonymous

      Ha sad shaming tactic. 99% of men can control their urges. You on the other hand pretended to be a girl to troll for sexual interactions with men... How did you control your urges exactly? Because you didn't do it with women? Attempting sexual interactions with the women is how our species survives. Without an attempt there would never be sexual interaction. Do you think only women should be the ones making the first move when it comes to sex... Because that is a very sexist mentality.
      If you think that trying to initiate sexual conversation with females instantly means disrespect, it explains why you are pretending to be a female to talk to men.

    • Did you read the myTake?
      I am 100% straight. This was to see what girls go through on a daily basis.
      No that 99% statistics is pure bs. I can provide you with the messages received and you can be judge of whether "I like your boobs", "You make me so horny" and e. t. c are means of self control or just acts of perversion. What you're supposed to do is treat women with respect as you would with men. Flirtation is obviously necessary to get a woman's interest but this is not how you do it.

      As for my own sexual urges I have them under control and when necessary, I deal with them like a man.

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  • Anonymous
    It woman approaching a guy only makes her look desperate to the WRONG type of guy. If he's anywhere half decent, he will be flattered and intrigued.
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