Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

Have you ever seen a couple that has been together for 52 years, and they act like two teens in puppy love?


I met a couple like that the other day. I must have been staring a bit too long because the woman asked me whether I had a question. Dumbfounded I just asked, “How do you two do it?”


I sat with Ellen and Josh for a good three hours gathering all the information I could that made their relationship so wonderful. This encounter must have been karma because I had been asked to do an article on relationships about a month before. I spent about three months in total working on the article.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

I had collected a pile of books, articles, magazines, and a massive bookmark folder on my computer covering the topic. The original was rejected because it was not PC enough. So, I expanded it with information I was not able to include because of space limits.


However, talking to Josh and Ellen changed the direction I would head.


I want what they have. I want to be the man that my woman desires to be with every second of every day. I want to desire her twice as much. I want us to love each other as long as there are stars in the skies above, and longer. I want us to melt when we are together.


The question is how does this happen? It can’t just be happenstance. It can’t just be that some people are lucky, and some are relegated to a life of semi-happiness. What I learned is that it is totally possible, and that a lot of bad advice is out there.


This is mainly written for what the man can do. It comes from the point of view of giving the woman what she wants and desires. I do deal with the topic of sex in the context that it is a celebration of two peoples deep feeling for each other. This is also in the context that the man respects the woman in every way possible way.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

The Problem


As a man we hear the answer “I want a good man” continually. We also hear “good men are hard to find.” What is a good man? If we look online at dating web sites we see the basic description given that includes honest, intelligent, a sense of humor, respectful, and confident. If that were all there was to it, good men are in abundance. However, in the grand scheme that description is the grain of sand that tops the very summit of Mt. Everest.


To make this work you, the man, have to do three things.


First, you must understand that there are halves that must be present. I’ll explain those below. Both halves enhance each other making them more powerful. The result is that the woman gets what she desires and needs. In return, the man gets what he desires and needs.


Next you have to be 100% honest, and communicate. With honesty you cannot hold back, you cannot sugar coat, you reveal everything. Yes, there are risks to doing this. But, without risk there is no reward. This doesn’t mean you just throw an entire department store of feelings and thoughts at her all at once. Be smart, and honestly reveal at the appropriate time. Honestly answer questions.


Finally, you communicate everything to your woman. Again, don’t smother her.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

Recently, a woman and I started exploring a relationship together. We have been talking for several months off and on about various topics. She has demonstrated all the traits I look for in a partner. Honestly she is the only one I found to have every trait I desire. She is a rare unicorn of a woman. When she expressed interest, I didn’t hesitate to respond. The rule we agreed upon is 100% honesty between us. Sometimes it’s uncomfortable, even embarrassing for us to reveal certain things. But, the feeling of knowing each of you has that level of trust is beyond words. She is truly my unicorn.


Through learning what I am sharing here, I hope, I want, to give her everything she desires mentally, emotionally, and physically. She is the only person I think about, the only one I desire to be with.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

What Women Want.


When I am speaking of women, I’m speaking of most women. Each woman is unique so everything may not fit exactly as described. Every woman has her own life experiences that will shape and define her. However, the information I collected was written in the context of most women, so it stands to reason that most women will agree. I am not including anything specific to the woman I am currently building a relationship with. As I mentioned, every woman is different.


Most women desire to be able to surrender to the man chooses. This doesn’t mean become a doormat. It simply means she wants to feel like a woman around him. Most women desire the traditional role when it comes to relationships. When she can surrender herself completely to you, it enhances the connection that she is able to feel. I’ll get into this a little more further down. I want to be clear on the definition of surrender. It does not mean she becomes an object, giving up her power, or totally submitting to authority over her. It means she is willing giving all of herself to you.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

Now, this has nothing to do with manipulation. If you are at all familiar with me, you will know that I loath manipulators. If the woman feels objectified in any way, she will not feel comfortable, and she will not be able to surrender. Surrendering has everything to do with the level of trust she has for you.


Men need to stop thinking in getting the woman. It is not about getting what you want. Getting what you want is a byproduct of completely fulfilling what she needs. You connect with her emotional soul, her romantic heart, innate sensuality, and she will willingly give you what you need.


Her Desires


Over the past several months I uncovered the first part of what women desire. This is the first of the two parts.


1) To feel special

2) To feel a deep emotional connection

3) To feel like a woman

4) To have passionate sex


Each of these desires does not truly work without the other three. If you take a close look and try to eliminate one of the four, the other three don’t work.


I didn’t just come up with these four desires. It just took me a while to decipher what was being said in the research papers, articles, and books I was reading. Then finding the link between each of these desires. It is up to you as the man to deliver on each of these desires.


She wants to feel appreciated and unique. She wants her man to treat her unlike any other woman in the woman in the world while supporting dreams and endeavors.


Feeling like a woman means her man makes her feel beautiful, feminine, and sexy. She desires to feel all the things that simply come with being a woman.


She desires to know her man in ways no one else does. She wants to be able to share herself with her man in ways that she cannot do with others. Do not be scared to show her that you are vulnerable. How can you have an emotional connection if you have zero vulnerabilities?

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

She desires to be enticed, teased, and satisfied. She wants her man to seduce her. You can say it is mental foreplay. Be subtle, be obvious with an air of sensuality. Don’t try to go from zero to light speed at the last second. Constantly seduce and passionate sex will happen that simply allows her let go. She wants to experience new things, try stuff in new ways, try new things with him. This can include new roles and fantasies.


When you as the man can do this for your woman she is able to feel affirmed, desired, and alive. When she feels these emotions the two of you can melt mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically.


Most men can only deliver on a few of these desires. To deliver, on all four is to be the man that women dream about. You have to be about her in every way. Women from all over the place continuously state that they will give you what you want in return, if you deliver.


In my three hours plus long conversation with Josh and Ellen, they confirmed what I am speaking of. Josh lives for Ellen and is not selfish in giving himself to her. Ellen in return gives Josh what he desires because she wants to please him in every way possible.


The foundation is undeniable trust through 100% honest communication.


Be The Man She Desires


If you really want to get a glimpse into the mind of women and what they want, it isn’t hard. Go read the top romance novels written by women. Read a porn story written by women for women. These are vastly different from stuff made for men. Or, go on a three-month journey going through hundreds research articles.


Aside from the four desires, there are four key traits women desire. Nearly every romance novel will have a male hero, or a male object of desire, for the female counter part. If you need further proof that women desire these traits, consider that romance novels are a $1.08 billion dollar industry in the United States. In Britain, the physical books alone that were sold in 2016 were worth £178.09m.


Again, I’m going to harp on this honesty and communication thing. Without that, you can do whatever you want, and the woman isn’t going to be able to willingly give herself to you the way she wants.


Now, there are aspects of my life that I cannot talk about. These are job related and sharing that information could have negative impacts that directly threaten my lively hood. However, I’m just honest in stating that I can’t share that particular part of my life at that point in time. I’m not trying to hide anything, I honestly cannot talk about certain things given my profession.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

As the man she desires you have to be responsive to her. You must be responsible for your woman in every way. When she surrenders, you are accountable for her mentally, emotionally, and physically. Playing mind games can wreak havoc on her for years. Physically abusing her in a sexual manner she is not comfortable with is not only illegal, but mentally and emotionally damaging. DO NOT manipulate or play mind games.


She wants you to be exciting, but not reckless. A little spontaneity can keep things exciting in more ways than one.


She wants a man who is considerate, but isn’t boring. Hold the door open for her, help her when she doing house chores. Nonetheless give her space, and don’t smother her.


She desires you to be intelligent, but not bland. Have a range of topics you can talk about. Be able to solve problems as they come up. Be willing to learn and look for answers when you need to.


Be a man’s man, but be interesting. The macho type men who work out, play sports, and hunt tends to become uninteresting. Do not allow the lifestyle to become all consuming. She will find you one dimensional.


Be dominate, but not demanding. Take the lead and have a plan for some things. Remain flexible though. She is an independent, intelligent, driven woman all day. When she comes home to you, she wants to simply surrender to your lead. Again, this doesn’t mean being told what she will and will not do.


For women, it’s difficult to find a man who has these all these traits. Then, when you include the four desires most women seek, and you see why women say “It’s hard to find a good man.”


When each part is present within you, each thing more powerful to her. She can allow herself be the woman you desire, and give herself to you completely. But, this can only happen if you, as the man, can give her what she desires.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

You need to be sensitive, yet still be strong; dominant, yet caring; sweet, but able to lead. It seems like a total contradiction as to what she wants. I’m about to give you guys the secret.


Everything Is Held In A Certain Context With Women


During the day and during the week, she wants to be seen as responsible. She wants to be in control of her life and destiny. She wants others to see her as proper, educated, and a professional woman with a career.


At night, in private, with her man whom she trusts she wants to be a little naughty. She wants to be able to express herself to him. She wants to be able to shed responsibility around the man she has an intimate connection with.


When you can understand this dichotomy of context, things start to make sense. For some men, everything they thought they knew changes.


Josh mentioned that the first year he was married to Ellen he didn’t understand the context thing. He said that he was treating her in private the way he did when they were in public. Things were okay, but not exciting. Ellen did say she was beginning to think she made a mistake. Then, Ellen said everything changed when Josh read a romance novel she was reading. It opened up a line of communication when he asked her what she got out of novels. Ellen was ruthlessly honest at that point, and Josh paid attention.


Ever since then Josh treats her like a proper woman in public with subtle romance flirtation. In private they are two different people who can satisfy each other. Ellen made it perfectly clear that Josh is not selfish. He works to satisfy her in every category and knows what she likes. He pays attention, and responds accordingly to her reactions. Be that in public, or the bedroom. This allows her to be the woman he wants, and is able to satisfy his needs because she wants to.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

Here is the key take away. Men - don’t be selfish. Live for your woman. Don’t get what you want, and then leave her hanging waiting to get what she wants. Many men make this mistake, and it is a huge turnoff for women. Eventually, the woman will just give up on even trying. When she finally breaks things off, the guy is standing there asking what happened. Well, you were selfish emotionally, mentally, or physically. Worse yet, you were selfish in all three areas.


When you are not selfish, she can lose herself in you. Something starts to happen, it becomes something neither of you can explain. However, both of you know it is exactly where you are supposed to be.


Support your woman. They are intelligent people and do not need you to solve their problems. Listen to them, and let them work through their emotions. They can figure out the rest. If they want a solution, they will ask.


Accept your woman. No judgements. Just admire and respect who she is. Allow her to be the woman in the relationship.

Timely Advice - How To Actually Meet Women’s Desires

To summarize everything, here is the take away areas.


1) Most women want a man who makes her feel good about her herself.

2) Most women want to be respected. Simultaneously they want to feel desired, sexy, and ready to be taken.

3) Most women want to feel as if they are being heard. They want to know that you accept them and hear what they DO have to say. Again, unconditional trust, acceptance, and respect.

4) Most women want to be women. They want to be treated like women, and the man to be a man. She needs for you to recognize the context. She is responsible and independent in public, while also craving sex and being able to surrender in private.

5) Take the lead. Be the gentleman by opening the door, planning a date, planning the romantic vacations. You can equally share the day to day responsibilities of shopping, home and car buying, how to raise the kids. But, let her be the woman in the other aspects of the relationship. She can only feel like the woman, when you are the man.


Hope this helps someone out there. I know doing all the research has helped me. Not only to become a better person, but become “that man” to the unique and rare unicorn of woman I choose. I don’t just want to be the man she wants. I want to be the man she truly desires in every sense of the meaning.


I wish I could include all of the information I have, but limits have me cutting a lot. If people like this one, I’ll do a follow up piece.

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Most Helpful Guys

  • I just wanted to write, don't be discouraged because of the haters and naysayers here. I read your take and bookmarked it as I totally identify with the way you described how to love a woman emotionally inside and out. Your take is probably the best and on point-take I've ever read here.

    Remember that you can never please everyone, it is those who appreciate what you write who matter. Constructive criticism is a different thing of course, but many haters just blatantly attack you with their counter opinion and refuse to even have a conversation. Don't take what they say to heart. Believe in what you do and success will follow. All the best.

    • I appreciate it. Glad I could help. I don't take the opposition personally. It's their opinion, they are entitled to it. I don't know - don't like it, don't use it. Well, except one where I apparently advocate rape. That kind of burned me up. My niece was raped. We didn't know it at the time. I was actually dispatched to the call, but had to recuse myself from the case. One of the hardest things I had to do. So, those repeated comments hit a personal note with me. 99% of the time I'm cool with it. I just don't want to respond to only the positives. That's just how I am. It's everyone or no one.

    • "It's everyone or no one." And I respect that, it's noble of you. I think Samanthaxoxo1 acts because of her pain of having been raped, and I totally sympathise with her pain, I can't know what it must have been like. It's awful that she is being vocal against you because of her own experience, sometimes people lash out against others because something you say triggers a painful memory or experience from their past. I once had a girl dislike me because my appearance reminded her of her ex. These things happen.

    • I can’t speak for her, but I’m cool with it now that know where she is coming from. If she needs to lash out at me to somehow get past it, so be it. I already told her I’m good. Since I know know where she is coming from, I’m not taking it personal anymore. She’s coming from a dark place.

    • Show All
  • Very good Take- a lot of communication from women is indeed subtle, and this is an area in which being experienced in relationship can really help, including having failed ones. A lot of guys don't take her needs into account, and that breeds a lot of resentment.

    • You actually got it. Hope it helps you out.

    • Thanks for the MHO

Most Helpful Girls

  • Best article!! Please do one for us women one day.

    • I have tons of information. I'll definitely look into it. I'll get back with you when I get close to completing it.

    • Thank you.

    • Not a problem.

    • Show All
  • I'm going to cry. Yes... this is true!

    • Good to see I got it right. Thank you. Please, don't cry. I haven't mastered passing the hanky through messages yet.

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What Girls & Guys Said

17 43
  • Just remember that the woman is always right even when she is w̶r̶o̶n̶g̶ right.

    • Lol, that's a given.

  • The issue I have with these sort of discussions is that it seems to create a clear divide between the sexes: that men want THIS, women want THAT. But everything you stated - to feel good about one's self, to be respected, to be heard, to want their partner to also take the lead sometimes, to be desired - these are things that men want as well (I left out the "want to feel like a woman" part, for obvious reasons. As a man, I too want to have a partner that makes me feel good about myself, that respects me, that listens to what I have to say, to desire me, that makes me feel special - tell me - who doesn't like to be respected, desired, listened to, etc?



    • I see what you are saying. The thing is that men are more physical than mental at first. Women are more mental than physical at first. So, if the man can be mental first, then both can meet at the physical. Then continue on the mental path. Essentially, the two are on the same wave length.

    • Omg thank you Stupid gender stereotypes

    • @Samanthaxoxo1 You're very welcome. Some of us don't subscribe to stereotypes. Whether we're the majority or minority, well, I can't rightly say.

  • How studious, proper and considerate of you... This was beautifully written. I found that you to hit a woman's desires, spot on. I'm delightfully impressed!

    • Thank you very much. It's nice to know that I got things right. Really appreciated.

  • After 15 years of marriage and some other relationships I don't think I agree with everything here.

    • I appreciate the feedback. It's may not be for everyone. Everyone is different.

  • Thanks for this MyTake 😊
    I was in a relationship where my ex was smothering me and getting worried or upset if some guy even looks at me in school. And he kept wanting his ego stroked and whenever I asked ‘well, what about me?’ He always responded “what about you? I just love you. I don’t know what to say.” And I tried to communicate and get some kind of answers from him. But he doesn’t like long discussions and left me there hanging with my thoughts, feelings, and emotions 😢.
    And he kept lying to me so ‘we could always be happy’ and not know the truth (which was bad).

    There was just so many red flags,... and I tried.
    So, I ended it completely ignored him.
    And trying to go on with my life.

    • I see what you are saying, as that was discussed in one of the articles I read dealing with divorce. What you describe is one of the top reasons why women filed for divorce. It's kind of bad to say, but at least you did not get that far into the relationship. Hopefully, you meet someone that will truly make you happy soon.

    • Your right, we did not get that far cause of those red flags and I tried to compromise and come with a solution and us discussing of what we need to work on and he always got annoyed by that and didn’t want to talk about it. And thank you. And what I got out of that relationship was a lesson. What to look out for and how to better handle such situations.

    • So, pretty much he was coming at it from a selfish side. He was in it for himself, instead of you. That put you on the side of constantly giving, and attempting to take the lead. Which, for most women, is not where they want to be in a relationship. It's hard to go through those. Too bad we don't come with owners manuals, and a features and benefits take. Someone shows interest, we could just ask to see the tag and manual, then go from there. If we don't live up to the list, just label us defective and return.

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  • "This is mainly written for what the man can do."

    Stopped reading right there.

    There are millions of collections of garbage like this, all telling men that we have to be X, or do Y, or act like Z.

    There might be a half dozen telling women what they should do. And they won't listen, because every one of them is a perfect princess snowflake because vagina.

    It's bad enough that women hate men. But men like you, that have internalized that and started hating yourself, well, that's damn sad.

    • Okay, cool. You're entitled to your opinion.

    • 👍 (The reply is no longer too short)

  • I don't care what women "desire".
    I desire the kind of a woman who desires the way I already am.

    If you feel like changing for someone else, suit yourself, but that isn't what would make me feel special.

    • That's cool. It's not for everyone.

  • Excellent writing as always.

    A lot of people on this site certainly could learn a lot from you.

    • Thank you. Much appreciated. It was originally for an online magazine. They rejected it because it didn't meet their intended audience. So, I did a re-write, to prevent any potential legal matters, and posted it here. The only option it would let me post in was sexual-behavior though.

  • I'll be honest: I only read the summary because this is a bit long for me right now, but numbers 1, 2, and 3 seem like things anyone would generally want - male or female. Numbers 4 and 5 kind of depend on the person, I would say. Some women are submissive, some are more dominant, and some are more equality-based in terms of decisions and responsibilities.

    I'm sure this kind of advice can apply well to some, but remember that it's a two-way street.

    • True. But I mention early on that this applies to most women. Every woman is different and unique. While it is something that most people do want, they miss it because they approach the relationship from the wrong standpoint. There are other relationship models as you mentioned. This one is the most widely researched, appeals to the widest demographic, and the type that works for me.

    • Might be true. I don't really know. I think most people can be pretty flexible when it comes to how their relationships work, but I can definitely see it being an ideal model for some.

    • I see where you are coming from. This is written for a wide and general audience. There is enough there to point people in the right direction. I agree that most people are flexible. A person may just use one tip, and have a perfect relationship. Actual specifics to cover every possible relationship model would be impossible to do. There is just too much information.

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  • I'm happy for you that you found her sweet spots

    • If she really liked you or desire you is because of your core values and in tuned with yourself and others.

    • Very true. But, I also want to ensure I give her everything.

    • Ok let's see part2 from you soon 💁🏻

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  • Thank you,
    i will meet women and their desires from now on.

    • Good to hear.

  • Lots to think about there - Roughly in line with my own thoughts maybe 90% as you say communication and honesty - The woman is submitting to you but she is subtly marking out what she expects from this submission and she can walk away any time - Definitely not for all it is a dynamic that suits certain types and both sides understand the full range of the relationship.

    • I agree that it suits certain types. A person of low self esteem will not be able to handle this. That much I know is true. You are 100% correct that both sides need to understand the full range of the relationship. That only comes from communication. You are also 100% correct in that the woman is subtly marking out what she expects. You give to her, she gives back. Only when she is fulfilled does she do things that shows you what she wants. Because you are willingly giving, you in turn do what she wants, and vice versa. Each item builds on the previous, as I mentioned.

  • Thanks for the advice

    • Not a problem. I hope it helps when you are ready to use it.

    • I’m in a relationship now and if you don’t mind I’ll ask one question, we both have madjor mental health problems (we met in a psych ward) so how do we blend 100% honesty without depending on eachother too much and stressing eachother out

    • Well, that's really outside of my knowledge range. What I believe is one thing, but you will have to try on your own, and maybe ask a counselor or doctor to see what they think. I believe that so long as you two are communicating what you need honestly it that should lower the stress level. Stress usually comes from one, or both, people trying to spare the other person. When they do this, they repress their own needs and start to become resentful. You want some dependency, just not to point that you are co-dependent for everything. That would be unhealthy. If you have a counselor, or a doctor you see ask them about that. See what they think and if it would work for you. They may recommend a slight modification to fit your specific circumstances.

  • Interesting myTake. :)

    • Thank you.

  • Nice take

    • Thank you.

  • That's really amazing

    • Thank you. I'm glad you liked it.

  • Great Take :)

    • Thank you. Really appreciate it.

  • Interesting take.

    • Thank you.

  • What if you're a girl? What do men want?
    xx
    ~ Mrs Manson

    • We just want to make you smile and happy. It's just hard to do lol

    • @thumper10 for me ya xx ~ Mrs Manson

    • I know!

    • Show All
  • That one woman...

    • Yes sir. That one woman.

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