Sexual Relationships
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Please help! how do I tell my parents I want a sex toy? ( dildo/vibrator) ?

Okay! I'm 18 and I want a vibrator/dildo, I don't drive yet and I can't order one online because my dad checks through everything and opens everything, my relationship with my parents is good but I feel uncomfortable asking if I can go buy one, I really want one, I've never been in a relationship and I'm honestly on the verge to becoming sexually frustrated and fingers or "homemade" objects don't do it and I don't want to hurt myself, my arguments are that its natural, I can't get pregnant and that about it, what would you do if your daughter asked you for one using those arguments and how would you ask your mom if you wanted one and are my arguments valid?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Don't use a toy until after you've lost your virginity. And you have real problems if fingers "aren't enough". Come on girl, get to know yourself better, no guy will ever satisfy you if you can't yourself, and you shouldn't need an object inside of you to get pleasure.

    And personally, vibrators and dildo's do NOTHING for me anyway. Seriously. It will not solve your sexual problems. And if you're so inclined to have one, personally I would avoid such an awkward and embarrassing thing to discuss with your parents, and just go to the shop. A 2 minute awkward encounter with a stranger which will be forgotten (and not even awkward for someone who works in a SEX SHOP) is better than traumatizing your parents... No father wants to have to think about their daughter doing that, and mentioning it to him is odd.

    • I've been able to pleasure myself with fingers lots of times but it's not enough anymore

    • "enough" for what though? To achieve orgasm? Don't be in such a rush to experience so much sexual stuff.. You have a lifetime to. It sounds corny but study instead, you don't need to invest all this time and money into pleasuring yourself if you can give yourself an orgasm easily. Sex is supposed to be explored with someone else, and is a HELL OF A LOT more fun that way. Wait til you find someone.. Thats my advice anyway. I learnt everything with guys and that was a lot more fun for me than just being like "yep, I know everything I did it all myself.." ok.. (also, that way, a guy is not really going to believe you when you tell him you're a virgin. Trust me on this, they're really funny that way, and if they think you're lying about it, you're relationship is fucked).

    • your*

  • Just go to a shop and buy one with cash? That way you won't have to go through it online and there's no risk of your parents finding any financial trace of it. I would probably rather die than admit to my parents I have sex toys.

    • what about the part of not being able to drive

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Most Helpful Guys

  • I would like to buy my daughter one as soon as she reaches puberty as a milestone present and to encourage her to become sexually comfortable. I don't think most parents would be comfortable like that though. Maybe your best argument is to say that you have been having intense sexual feelings and want to get one as a deterrent from having premarital sex. In that case your parents will either be cool with it and ask you why you don't just find a nice boy. Or be cautious and go and get one to keep your pants zipped up.

    Or you COULD just go buy one without them knowing like most people your age do.

  • I'd ask your mom and use the "if you say no to a toy I'm gonna get laid" angle

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What Girls & Guys Said

6 20

  • You just tell them. I bought my daughters each one.

  • It's not something I can imagine going to a parent about.
    Go to the mall with a friend and buy one at spencer's or something! Go to a dollar store and buy a cheap electric tooth brush. the motors in those are powerful, just use the back of the head, not the bristles.
    Even being unable to drive, yourself, or place private orders, there are still ways to get this for yourself. It isn't a matter of having a good or bad relationship with your parents, it's a matter of having some privacy.

    • As someone who's 14, and who's mom works at Spencer's, there's no way id be able to do that 😭😭

  • Sweety talk to your mum about it. i know my mum was happy to buy one for me and my sisters

    • In saying that you are 19 you'll just be able to walk into a quality sextoy retailer and by one with any form of question apart from the usual.. Do you want me to show you how it works? Do you know how to wash it? If you can and have enough cash buy a quality vibrator it will get used and you dont to waste $40 on a cheap one that won't when you could spend $70-100 and get something that will last. there's some around that charge L-Ion batteries via usb rather than the old AA or D sized batteries

  • Your arguments are completely valid and I can't imagine any parent would argue with logic like that. I could see if your folks are really irrational prude types, but if you like me grew up in a pretty supportive open minded home then I would say just be honest with them and go for it.

    Besides, I doubt they want your slime all over the shower heads / remote controls / stairway banisters anyway. Eww, they must consider the alternative to be better!

  • Find a sex shop and drive there.

    • they said they can't drive tho?

  • I would go through your mom and ask her not to tell dad. Maybe she will understand and help you get one.

  • Some things are private. By age 18, you are old enough to join the military, vote for a president, marry, and have a baby. Why on earth would you need mommy and daddy to consent to your masturbatory preferences?

    • lol I'm open about talking to them about anything just don't know how to approach them and start the conversation, both my parents say it perfectly normal but I don't know how'd they react to this

  • Vibrator will literally loose any liking for a penis. It can never vibrate and go in 10 different directions. lol , i dont know how you could ask your parents.

  • just order one online. If they find it before you do then you can talk to them about it. BUT there is always the chance that you can get the package before they do..

  • Why not just have a friend drive you, or catch a bus, or a cab.

  • Hint sex-toy magazines lying around by "accident" every few days with the dildo you want being open. They will pick up on it.

  • Get the package sent to a friends house

  • www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1907203-as-a-parent-if-you-were-a-parent-would-you-buy-your-daughter-a

    Relax. You have a 64% chance that they will say yes.

    :D

  • "Mom, can I borrow yours?"

    • nooo that'd be gross 😖 I don't want to share one with my mom haha I want my own

    • it was a joke lol >.<

  • It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. Just order one. If they find out then have the talk.

  • I would only ask your mom, your dad might feel uncomfortable. And I think your mom would understand and be ok with it. I don't know, every parent is different

  • I would say you're a adult it's you private life you don't need to ask me. it's you money spend it on what you like.
    it's normal for you to feel this way if you want to talk we can.

  • Do you have a indipendant friend? If yes, give her money and ask her to buy it for you... So, its win-win and the awkward feeling of telling parents is not needed anymore

  • I'd just ask your mom. NOT YOUR DAD. Who knows your mom might have one to give you.

  • Your arguments are valid and just ask for one. Get what you really want too. I went through a simalar situation message me ok?

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