Sexual Relationships
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My husband is following a shit ton of half naked girls on Instagram with OnlyFans accounts. He has lied when confronted in the past. What to do?

I discovered my husband is following a TON of girls on Instagram who have OnlyFans accounts/pose nude/do porn/have links to other sites for more NSFW content. We have had issues in the past with him viewing porn, creating lists of his favorite porn stars (as well as random girls on Facebook he found to be hot) and lying about it/denying it when confronted. How would you feel in this situation? What should I do? I am ready to divorce him because this is a cycle over seven years.
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Superb Opinion

  • Try not to come at him like it's a bad and unnatural thing and maybe he won't hide it from you and won't feel ashamed. Be open about it, you are married for God sake. As long as he isn't going out and cheating on you then it's totally fine in my opinion.

    But also everyone has different boundaries.
    There was a poll done with woman for what they considered cheating and it varies vastly. Some think just watching porn is cheating. Some just engaging in meaningful conversations with other woman and the obvious actual cheating sex etc.

    Set your boundaries and be open with each other but if you think you should divorce your husband for watching porn then maybe you are on different pages and need some sort of conversation so you both understand what is okay and what is not okay

    • If he is lying about thing's it is probably because he feels ashamed and it will only drive the wedge further try being understanding and hopefully he can also be understanding to you becuase it's a two way street if he is only watching porn and spending lots of money not paying you any attention then that is an issue for sure

Most Helpful Guy

  • Gotta be honest. Is his fixation directly affecting your relationship sexually, financially or socially?
    If you lie about this, you do not have my sympathy. Your feelings are under your control. Control them.
    Otherwise, how different is it from a gaming fixation.
    By confronting him, you made him lie. In politics, that's called a process crime. You entrapped him.
    If you feel you have to divorce him, do him that favor and save him time and heartache.

    • Unfortunately, it is affecting our relationship, as he prefers pornography to real physical affection with me. He rejects me often, which is a part of why in the past I've felt it necessary to confront him. I have not said anything this time. I came here first to get advice on how to approach, if to even approach at all.

    • Ask him what you can do for him to pre-empt his fixation.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 9

  • Why is it so important to you. They're just pixels.

    Why Men Watch Porn ↗

    • Look for The Oracle's Take on this. Worth reading. Trust me.

  • You're failing your duty as a wife my dear. So he's looking elsewhere. Instead of divorce, why not find out what you're missing and fix THAT?

    And if he's not at the top of your list, your priorities, figure he'll find someone who WILL put him there.

    My bet is you two need some help, professional counseling. Not that I wholly recommend them, but this is a fairly basic breakdown of the marriage covenant.

  • Enjoy your impending divorce, and impending single life while he goes on to find someone else, if you think that "confronting" your husband for normal behavior is going to win you the day.

    • I get that a lot of guys view porn, but lying about it is the part that is most bothersome...

    • Sis, you're somehow missing that it doesn't MATTER whether he is lying about it-- YOU shouldn't be "confronting" him about it at all in the first place, since it's not your business what he does with his own fucking eyeballs. How about recognizing that males want and desire sex and physical romance far more than you do, and clearly something in the relationship is lacking or else he would be paying more attention to you? What are YOU doing to please him and visually stimulate him?

    • Asker: You entrapped him. Is your control, disguised as "feelings" worth tossing him? Then do it. @Thatsamazing is right.

    • Show All

  • If he's lying about it, then chances are something else is going on. If you aren't happy, and nothing changes, then get out of that marriage.

  • Porn is normal my freind, he can masterbator to whatever he wants as long as your vagina is the only one his dick goes into

  • Does he still have sex with you? Does he cheat on you? I am trying to find out if it is an addiction or you seem to have issues with him finding other people as good fap material.

  • You put up with it, like you have until now, or you do something about it

  • Chill out he's a guy. We all do it

    • Would you feel differently if he was paying for content and not showing me any affection?

    • I pay for content and my girlfriend understands that a guy can't be sexually attracted to one girl forever

    • He'll come back round to you eventually

    • Show All

  • Send him my way I like teasing married guys ;)

  • That’s none of your business.
    You shouldn’t be “confronting him” at all.
    His visual fantasy is normal and not your concern.
    Just like your natural female fantasy is not his business and him trying to stop you from having them.

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