My boyfriend doesn't want sex...like ever. I need help. :(

Anonymous
Ok so he's 20, I'm 20, and we've been dating for about a year and a half. He's super sweet and he takes care of me in any way he can. He loves me! Which is, I guess, why I've been able to stay in denial so long about the fact that he has the sex drive of an 80-year-old woman!...or maybe a baby sloth or something? Sigh.

See, we have plenty sex, but as long as we've been dating, he's said he doesn't really need it or anything, and he's fine without it. He's even gone so far as to say he feels sex is more for the benefit of the woman than the man. For the longest time I thought he was full of sh*t and just didn't want to seem like another sex-obsessed male.

But it's been slowly dawning on me that the boy doesn't really even want it like...at all! I'm starting to see that every time, I've instigated it. He goes along with it because he does love me and it's not like he doesn't enjoy it, but if I never tried, I think it would never happen. When we first started having sex, I think he wanted to because we were all shiny and new and in brand new love and it was all special and junk.

But now...

Well last night I had been kissing him and smiling at him and cuddling with him and eventually he was like "Ok I can tell you want sex, and I'm not really feelin it to be honest." I mean, if I WAS feeling in any way romantic, I sure as hell wasn't any more!

I got up, turned out the light, got in bed and started crying. He felt bad, so he reached over to me and I guess felt the tears cause he realized I was crying and we talked about it, but all I concluded from the talk is that my boyfriend will just never feel tempted by me, and maybe rarely has in the past. He seemed quite confident that he was attracted to me, and I'm confident that I'm attractive, so I don't get it.

I feel helpless, lonely, and just damn depressed. I can't do much for him, and not that I want to manipulate him, but really, I have no pull here. He's already a man. He's set up in life to have the power. Now I know I don't even have this power. I kind of feel more like his dog or his child than his lover.

On top of that, I just wonder how long I can be OK with not being wanted at all. The realization alone made me break down in tears, which I don't often do. And is it so bad to just want your man to want you?

What the hell do I DO?
My boyfriend doesn't want sex...like ever. I need help. :(
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