Would you be comfortable in a relationship where your boyfriend or husband did most or all of the cooking, grocery shopping, cleaning, and laundry, PLUS his regular day job? And assume you could get him to do all this gladly -- without complaining! If you could get your boyfriend or husband to behave this way, would it make you happy? Or would you miss doing the cooking, shopping, cleaning, and laundry yourself?
I'd say, "Wow, is this guy for real? " And then I would probably wake up and come back to reality. Hey, I'm happy when he washes the dishes after dinner and vacuums for me. I don't want someone to do everything for me, plus could you really "trust" a guy to do all that? I mean, what kinds of things would he be cooking and buying at the grocery store? Right now, I don't mind doing most of it, but someday when I have kids. I will certainly be looking for more participation!
How archaic to assume I would be doing all the household duties anyhow. And then to assume that its so much apart of my routine, and so expected of my role that it would be missed if my husband did it and that I would be made uncomfortable? Oh my, women are never going to get anywhere if people keep perpetuating sexist standards like this.
That's exactly why I am asking. Forty five years after Betty Friedan published "The Feminine Mystique", women (as well as men) still seem to treat housework as a "feminine" duty, and be uncomfortable with men doing most or all of it. Why is that?? - 6 months ago
I hate to say this.. I would miss it. I love sharing duties. Love cooking together, and I like to have things cleaned a certain way. But, he could help out that is for sure.
What if your boyfriend or husband would perform the tasks under your supervision? You could direct him to clean a certain way, wash and fold your clothes the way you like, cook the menus you choose, etc. Would you be happy? Or would you miss the domestic work? - 6 months ago
As a guy, I'd be quite upset if I was told how to clean, wash, fold, cook, etc. The word slave would come up to mind as an apt description. - 6 months ago
Question Asker
Ionlife: A slave can't quit or leave. And a slave does not get certain, umm, "favors" in return for his willingness to help with the housework. A husband who will do housework under his wife's expert direction can expect to be made VERY happy later. - 6 months ago
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(Age:18 to 24)
When: 6 months ago
It's not so much that I would miss all that stuff. But rather that I'd feel bad he was doing it, even if he didn't complain. I'd prefer that we share the chores, or do some of it (especially something like grocery shopping) together. But if he really wanted to do it, and insisted on doing it all himself, I'd be comfortable with it, just as long as he wasn't taking on all the responsibility because he felt like he "should. "
And heck, if he cooks better than I do (which, it's almost impossible that he wouldn't. My cooking skills are a bit lacking), he's free to do as much of it as he wants! LOL.
Yes, assume that your boyfriend or husband gladly agrees to take on all the household chores simply to make you happy. Would it really make you happy? Or would this change of roles, with the man doing most or all of the housework, be uncomfortable for you? - 6 months ago
Answerer
I'd probably tell him I'd be happiest if we shared the work more or less equally. I see a relationship (esp. A live-in one) as a partnership where both people must contribute equally, and since we both have outside jobs, we should both do housework too. - 6 months ago
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Describe your ideal first date; Where do you go? What do you wear? How does the date end?
Going out to a concert, a good sports game, something like that! then dinner! After that just whatever we want, go to clubs, hang out at home, just drive around!I would wear jeans, a tank top, and my boots!
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