So this is a very very long story but I'll try to sum it up a bit. I was friends with this girl who had a boyfriend for like 7 months. We had a class together so we saw each other every day. Well eventually I really started to get feelings for her. We texted nonstop and she randomly one day went "be honest, do you like me?" I probably shouldn't have but I told the truth. Well her boyfriend treats her lower than dirt. He has actually hit her before and refused to spend time with her unless she gives him head. It bothers me so much but she says she's in love with him. I kept tryin to show her I could be a better guy for her. We flirted a lot and she relied on me to feel better when he made her upset (which was A LOT of the time) well eventually she said she felt horrible because she felt like she was cheating on her boyfriend so she told him everything. So now he hates my guts and doesn't want us talking unless he is around. I got in a pretty big fight with her and for a while there seemed to be lots of tension between us. I tried texting her one day and she told me to please leave her alone so I said okay. That happened about a month ago and we haven't spoken or seen each other since. I still think about her all the time and hope that whatever she is doing, she's happy. That's all I really wanted was for her to be happy. I want to make things better. Would getting her a Christmas gift help? Like unexpectedly? Or would she just bust out again and get mad? I'm so confused. If anything, I just want to be friends but she doesn't want to talk to me right now and her boyfriend hates me. What should I do?
Update: So last night she texted me for the first time in 2 months. She said "Hey..." When I replied, she didn't txt me back the rest of the night. Why did she even bother texting me?
6 days ago
First of all, you should get her something for Christmas. Do you have any ideas of what you want to get her?
I think the "Leave me alone." might have just been a bad mood...
When you give her the present, just look lovingly into her eyes to show her without speaking how you feel. Then tell her you'll always be there for her and you hope she can find a better guy that can treat her better. Then kiss her on the forehead or cheek. Whatever works best at the time.
I wouldn't worry about the boyfriend. He probably has a small d*** or has parents that don't love him, so he tries to bring everyone else to his level.
I don't think I could be able to give her the present to her face. And if I could, I know for a fact that I wouldn't be able to do any of that stuff. Not the best way to start talkin to a girl again after we have avoided each other for.....well at Christmas it will have been 3 months - 10 days ago
as much as girls deny it, we love it when guys play the "push and pull" game with us. so basically we need those moments where it seems like you're really into us, then all of a sudden like you don't have time for us. that constant confusion (while frustrating at times) can make us crazy cause we think about you all the time.
so I'm thinking a christmas gift might make you look like too much of a nice guy. if I were you, I would try to figure out where she is going to be one day (like at a cafe or popular restaurant) and "accidentally" run into her and look really hot when you do. act like you're kind of excited, but too busy to talk to her. I guarantee, she won't stop thinking about you for a few days.
.......wow. I have got to say, that is probably the most brilliant thing I have heard in a long time. Haha. Never would have thought about that. Thanks =) - 14 days ago
Oooh, that's a tough question. And a really rough situation. This girl is not helping herself out and honestly, even if you got her away from the boyfriend she's going to have issues. That's likely to lead to cheating or hurting you because another man hurt her. It's a nasty mess.
Look, the girl won't stand up to the guy and leave him so she's probably not going to stop him when he comes to punch your face in. If he's hit her he's emotionally unstable and a real danger. Not to mention the fact that she HAS a boyfriend and has let herself get close to you. Ever heard once a cheater always a cheater? She's no good and asked you to leave her alone. Try to respect her wishes and maybe she will see she's totally lost you and stand up to that jerk and leave him for good. I'm afraid it will be your absence - and not a gift - that makes her realize what she needs to do. Pull back. She'll miss you soon but don't accept her attempts to re-establish a friendship until boyfriend is out of the picture.
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