Im only 17 years old, my parents have been divorced since I was 7 years old. my dad stopped paying child support 2 years ago,he honestly cannot afford it. and the truth of the matter is, I don't care at all, I don't need money, I make my own money. I can pay for myself for anything, I even bought my own car and insurance and gas. and my mom took my father to court today, but the funny thing is. why did she wait 2 years, when just last week my dad got surgery, and cannot work, and his wife just recently got paralyzed and cannot work. why wait those two years to when my dad is at his worse? and all this shit is coming at ME left and right. not to mention parents are constantly on my case about my grades and spending too much time with my girlfriend, yet my grades are average and I see my girlfriend maybe once a week and on weekends.
I want to know what I can do to just get away from it all or get it to stop or something.
I'm moving out in a couple months when I turn 18. but that's 2 months of hell.
Update: Ok well I try as hard as I can in school , and yet its just not good enough
3 months ago
The first thing I would do is pray. Mostly because God can do anything, and secondly because he can give you a different perspective. But if your not Christian.
Take yourself out of the situation mentally, which generally means physically. I have kind of been in a similar situation, so the best thing you can do, is let it go. Using my crazy analogies- be a duck let the water slide right off your back. Its not your problem, don't let it affect you.
BTW car insurance/gas, is the least you have to worry about, you have so many add-ons, like health care, dental care, eye care, food, house hold bills and rent - especially if you are planning on going to college. It all adds up so fast.
Parents are crazy people, sometimes they can't let go. And the worst part is they stick you right in the middle, I know this is crazy but sometime, you need to be the one setting the example. There relationship might also be affecting how they view yours with your girlfriend, that is generally how life works.
Oh and in my opinion, School is a overrated. I walked out of so many of my classes, didn't bother to do my home work, except for English paper which I affectionately did the night before it was due, and I still graduated with 2. 99 grade point average. Public High school is a joke. But similar to parents most of the time it has no idea what its doing, which is essentially perpetuating hypocrisy.
First of all, you don't have to own the problems of your parents. That's their set of issues. Your only focus needs to be on school, your girlfriend, and working.
Having a goal, and planning to get there and taking the steps is the best way out of any situation. Just ask yourself where you want to be a few years from now, and then take steps to head in that direction. It doesn't matter if you reach the goal (goals can change), only that you improve yourself along the way and do well for yourself.
If you want a certain job, start looking into the training you will need to land it. If you want to live in a different state or do some traveling, look into that too. Start doing things that focus on only you, and let the people around you who are having issues deal with the issues themselves.
A family member of mine often said to me as I was growing up, "No one is going to go out of their way to make you happy, you have to get there on your own. " Meaning that people will always primarily take care of their own needs, so you shouldn't totally put your future or needs in the hands of another. So far, I agree with the statement.
You are never alone, no matter what you go through it is not hard to find someone else who has been through it too, and if they are happy despite (or possibly thanks to) it then they should have advice for you and be able to help you see things from the perspective you're missing. Never forget this, if you want to help those around you, start with yourself, be all that you can and that means more than average. I went from straight A's in advanced courses in my last year of high school to being kicked from university twice. I found out in the end its not how smart you are but how hard you work. I only wish I could go back to your age and work hard on school, and that doesn't mean you can take it easy because you have time. If you just work hard for these two months you'll already have the skills to easily do well in any other courses you might take later. Respond positively to all of this and make sure the time you spend with your girl is special. Realize that she needs to use her time wisely too. It's nice to spend lots of time together but sometimes its about the quality of that time together. Remember people change for the better or for the worse, even the nicest girl in the world can change and hurt you if you think of yourself too much. And with your parents, realize you don't know the whole story and everyone has good in them, they just need to avoid the frustrations in life to be able to show it. Be thoughtful of others, and gauge your success by your efforts and not by a grading system that isn't designed just for you. Be all that you can be, but it won't happen right away, there's no such thing as perfect and you can only improve a little bit at a time. You're parents have seen the importance of school and they usually known what will make you ultimately happy.
First...two months is nothing. I can hold my breath longer than that
Second...Run your own life and do it successfully and you won't be bothered by these types of issues. You don't need to measure your life by those of your parents. You'll have 'other' issues then like getting a better paying job and paying the rent on time etc.
Third...It's good that you're planning on leaving at 18 anyways. Better for you. Better for them. Better for all.
But watch your grades for your own sake, a free education should be taken for all its worth and many people never get to college let alone graduate. You've quickly got to learn the essential skills to compete and survive in this world as an adult and you've only got two months.
The thing is that live 3 hours away from my family, and the reason I moved away is that I don't get along with them. Now when I visit them I really...
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