I have been hanging out with this girl for almost a year now. It's never been Boyfriend and girlfriend but anyone who's seen us together assumes it. We've always hung out and had fun, I always make her laugh. Anyway, one day she called me up when after she was drinking and taking some medicine and told me how hard she was it was for her to find someone who's just like her. She asked me a bunch of questions and at the end said "I should marry you." I told her I would without question because I cared a lot about her. She told me she just went crazy that night, I seems to happen every time she drinks. Last time she kissed me good night. We haven't hung out since. I talk to her through e-mail, but we haven't seen eachother. I'm not worried if she's gonna see me again. I just want to understand more. She said she doesn't want anything to do with relationships but her heart sometimes wins and she hates it. Yet she's so happy when she's with me. Honestly I don't know what to do, she seems to wanna be with me as a couple, but she refuses it at the same time. I'd wait for her, and I'm going to wait for her, but I can't help but think. Am I making her life worse? I'm just being me, and she likes me but she hates that she does. I know she's not the easiest person to figure out but ladies If you could give me an idea why she would resist I would greatly appreciate it.
sounds like she's really scared to be in a relationship. why does she have to be drunk to tell you she likes you? she's too afraid to say it sober. I don't think it's anything your doing or NOT doing. I think it's all about what's going on in her head. Being young has a lot to do with it. I'm 21 and relationships are scary. She obviously has some problems she needs to work through, and it might help her to not drink so much. Whatever you do, though, don't give into her when she's drunk. I guarantee you she'll get upset. Just let her say what she needs to say and take it with a grain of salt, but let her keep her dignity. As far as waiting for her goes, I'm not sure what you're waiting on. For her to tell you that she wants to be with you? I wouldn't wait around, so to speak. Stay friends but be realistic about what's going on. If she comes around and decides for real that she wants to be with you, that's cool. If not, try not to take it personally and just be her friend. I really think she needs a friend more than anything based on the way she's acting. Hope this helps!
I agree with everything written here in the comments before! Everything is correct!
She just NEEDS to be positively sure you are not like the other men that hurt her in the end! She needs to know you will always be there for her and be able and willing to protect her at any cost!
"She said she doesn't want anything to do with relationships but her heart sometimes wins and she hates it"
definitely sounds like she wants to be saved from the castle she has built around herself. Take that as an invitation to tear down some walls, but only if you are serious about it.
I agree with "wounded"! She is like the girl in the movie "Along Came Polly." How she doesn't have a relationship with you is actually a way of having a relationship with you. I think you have what you need to go after her. I think she needs the assurance that you wants what she wants.
I know I'm not a girl, but it's easy to see she wants you, and no one else. I know as guys, we can't always see what females actions normally represent, but this is a clear case.
She thinks about being with you. & acts on it, but is afraid of losing you as a great friend, if her bad luck in relationships doesn't change.
Good Luck Man "Do what you gotta Do" Or in the words of the late Ray Charles, "Gotta Make It Do What It Do"
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