Okay, the first thing you should know about me is that I recently bought a motorcycle and my bike has basically become my life and I am single.
Monday night at about 9:30 PM there was a knock at my door. I opened the door to see who it was and there was a beautiful girl who I didn't recognize crying on my doorstep. She looked to be about my age or maybe a couple years younger. Anyway, she was crying her eyes out and asked me "are you the owner of the bike in the driveway?" My first thoughts were "WHAT THE F--- DID YOU DO TO MY BIKE?" but then I noticed she was wearing motorcycle safety gloves and a safety jacket. I said yes and then she told me "I'm your neighbor from up the street. I just bought a new motorcycle a few days ago and while pulling it into my driveway just now I accidentally dropped it and can't pick it back up. Can you come help me?" Of course I said yes.
I walk down with her to her place and she introduces herself as Kelly and she seems really nice, somebody who I'd wanna get to know and hang out with more.
We get to her place and I see her bike laying there in her driveway and just as I'm about to help her pick it up, her boyfriend (!) comes out of the house, apparently either drunk or high on something. Now, he sees his girlfriend there crying with her bike laying on the ground. Any decent's boyfriend's first question should have been "are you ok?" but no. Instead, right away, he yells at her telling her she's stupid for trying to bring the bike around the back way instead of parking it out front. He's not making the situation any better. Then he asks her why she didn't get him instead of coming to me. She says she tried but she was locked out and he wasn't answering the door or his cell phone. Then he asks her who the hell I am and basically shoos me away when I say I'm there to help.
Now, the romantic/chivalrous part of me wants to step in and kick his ass for treating this nice girl like that, but the logical part of me says that arguments like this are probably normal between them and that I'm better off just not getting involved in their drama.
The logical side of me won out and I just started walking away, and as I was, the girl made it a point to come over to me and apologize for the way he was acting, saying he's "not normally like this", and thanking me for coming over to help.
Chance meetings like this are the kind of things that only happen in movies, not in real life. Until the boyfriend came out, everything was like out of a scene from a movie. It was almost surreal. She seems nice but the fact that she's with a dick who obviously doesn't want her to have any other men in her life, even as friends, is obviously standing in the way of me getting to know her better. Do I just forget about her and move on, or do I work to try to find a way to steal her away from her obviously abusive boyfriend? Does the fact that she's with him make her "damaged goods" and not worth my time?
Update: I don't know how long they've been together but they're living together so it apparently must have been a while.
5 months ago
Update: As I stated in the comment below, simply getting to hang out with her more to get to know her better is an issue because her jealous, insecure boyfriend presents a MAJOR obstacle there.
5 months ago
Update: One of the issues I'm facing the situation is whether or not it's worth it to try. I mean, what does it say about her that she's willing to put up with being treated like that? How would she react if she got with a guy who treated her good?
5 months ago
She would LOVE you if you treated her well. I think you are being too hard ton her. My mother told me I was a worthless piece of shit everyday and I would have cyber sex with guys online. She could be the way she is because of circumstances that are out of her control. I would put up with guys who treated me bad because I had a brain tumour and couldn't survive on my own. You really can't judge from first impression, what kind of girl she is, or why she would put up with someone who treats her like that.
I suppose you're right, but my perspective is this: My sister was in a relationship similar to the one she appears to be in and despite the fact that it put a huge strain on the entire family she would not leave him until recently, and now my sister IS what people call "damaged goods". She'll never be able to be in a healthy relationship again because she's become accustomed to problems and drama and creates it when it's not already there. Part of me is worried she might be the same. - 5 months ago
Answerer
I think give her a chance before you make that judgment... If things don't work out... you can leave her and the best part will be that she's no longer with her abusive boyfriend. Get to know her and stay at the friendship stage for as long as you feel comfortable. I agree with Hercules. - 5 months ago
Yes I think you should make a move on this girl. You can obviously do a better job at being her boyfriend then she can. First be her best friend and she might think it's wrong for her to cheat on her boyfriend. After you guys are really close tell her you have feelings for her. PLEASE PURSUE HER AND TAKE HERE AWAY FROM THAT NASTY JERK!
But that right there is a problem because she lives with her boyfriend and he definately seems like the insecure jealous type who doesn't want his girl to even have any guy friends. - 5 months ago
Answerer
Well find a way to talk to her then. Find some chance you have to run into her again. Maybe he'll get drunk and she'll come back to you again. - 5 months ago
Answerer
Only you can decide if she's worth it. It won't be easy, but if you want to maybe help someone, then here's your chance. - 5 months ago
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(Age:18 to 24)
When: 5 months ago
asked 4 days ago
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