Anonymous User

Got her a Valentine's card, she says I'm creepy. am I?

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Anonymous User (Age:18 to 24)     When: 2 months ago
Category: Behavior

So, I met this girl at work, it was my first job, and we almost immediately got along well. It was summer and I didn't know how I felt about her, at the time I was pretty neutral. She ended up leaving for college, it was at this point I started to realize hey, I kinda miss this girl. She came back for 2 weeks due to winter break, and everybody else we work with caught on to my attraction to her, and started teasing is both, almost as if they wanted us to get together. She responded pretty positively to everything, Id always catch her stealing looks at me, whenever I'd glance over shed look at something else, shed always come over to talk to me, would come up with excuses to brush my hand, so I definitely felt something in the air. I decided to ask her out, however she was busy that night, and ended up going back to school a few days after. She didn't go cold on me, she even brought her friend in and she just out of the blue tells me I have a really nice smile and I heard them whispering to each other, her friend goes "you were right, he does have a really nice smile" as soon as I heard that I sorta blushed up a bit, I'm not used to getting compliments, however I did thank her, I figured it was common courtesy. As I said she did go back to school but it felt like I was thinking of her more and more each day. Valentine's day comes around and I decided to send her a card and a package of her favorite cookies, I know tons of little details about her just from actually engaging in conversation with her. The one problem I ran into was I didn't have her dorm info or anything, all I knew was the college she attended and what city that was in, so I simply addressed it there, and signed it to her, hoping it would find its way to her door. Well it did, I work with one of her best friends, who I'm also quite good friends with, and she tells me that my crush's exact words were: "of course I would get the creeper asking to be my valentine" upon hearing this I kinda just wanted to crawl into a hole forever. I'm not very aggressive with women, I don't think aggression should be involved at all in the whole dating game I loke to take things slow and actually get to know girls I may find interesting, the fact that I had found someone I could open up to in any sense was sorta rare. So ladies, if this were you, would you feel creeped out if a guy you knew liked you sent you something for v day? It wasn't even anything extravagant, it was just a nice little "I'm thinkin of you" type of gift :/ I don't think v day should be a day in which everybody decides to be the perfect gentleman or anything, but it does deserve some merit or some sort of recognition.

Man do I feel sh*tty :l


Update: she wasn't around for me to give it to her in person, otherwise I'd have loved to do that. the college she attends is approximately 4 hours away, I'd think it would be even more creepy for me to just show up unannounced at her door with a Valentine's card lol.    2 months ago

Update: and she did disclose her location to me. like I said, I would actually engage in conversations with her. she told me where she went to school, what she was going for, stuff like that.    2 months ago

Update: lol sorry for all the updates, I keep picking up little things in your sentence. the fact that it made it to her dorm was pure luck, I literally just addressed it to the school and they got it to her. I didn't have any specific information on that package other than just her name. it was a shot in the dark.    2 months ago

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From Girls  
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What Girls Said

  • udolipixie
    24172  
    2 months ago
    Got her a Valentine's card, she says I'm creepy. am I?
    You are to her as creepy is often subjective and what makes one girl feel unsettled, unsafe, and/or uncomfortable may be fine with another.

    So ladies, if this were you, would you feel creeped out if a guy you knew liked you sent you something for v day?
    I'd be creeped out by the way you sent the Valentine's day since you could have given it to me in person at work and instead you chose to send it to where I live a location I didn't disclose to you. Note how you didn't have her dorm info so it understandably it creeped her out that you were able to send it to here there.

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    • Answerer
      2 months ago
      She doesn't work during the school year so presumably she wasn't working that entire month and despite not seeing her and not having a way to give it to her in person you still got it..O.O

      I'm starting to think it's not only the way the valentine was given but who gave it as perhaps you're overestimating your closeness and you're simply a work acquaintance she chats with if you seemingly had no other way to contact her.
    • Question Asker
      2 months ago
      there was no way I could give it to her the day after, as she was 4 hours away at college. she doesn't work during the school year. I agree a day would be no big deal, unfortunately it'll still be another couple of months before she comes back.
    • Answerer
      2 months ago
      By belated I meant a day. If you didn't see her on Valentine's day then give it to her the next day.
    • Question Asker
      2 months ago
      heeeyy there's a nice space for comments. anyway, you're saying that it depends on the girl whether or not she would think it is creepy. I appreciate your input nonetheless. personally I would think saving a gift for her specifically from Valentine's day may come off as a bit weird, seeing as how Valentine's day was 5-6 months ago. the only difference I see here between your comparison between a dorm and a town, is that if I sent a package off to a town with nothing but a name on it, it'd be lost.
    • Answerer
      2 months ago
      So a belated gift didn't cross your mind? She disclosed what school she went to not her dorm information it's like disclosing you live in a town in a conversation then later having that person knock on your door at home.
 

What Guys Said

  • MyNameIsJonas
    12696  
    2 months ago
    Im not exactly sure what type of connection you two shared it can be skewed at times from the individual. She may have just found it rather unsettling that you knew where her dorm was located in fact she may not know it got there on luck. You are also hearing second hand what was said although if you believe it was definitely said I can see why that would be hurtful.

    Regardless I think that of anyone to say something like that towards another for sending them a Valentine's gift is disrespectful. Its a nice gesture.

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  • Betawolf
    7889  
    2 months ago
    I don't think it's really that creepy, depending on what you wrote to her. I think it is actually quite sweet and if I were a girl (hell, or even if a girl sent me something) I'd be flattered. From what you've told us, she had to have at least been interested in you to say the least. Whether she wanted something more than just friends...none of us can know that.

    So is it creepy? No. Worst case scenario, you just mis-judged the situation and it really isn't a big deal...just move on. Better luck next time I suppose =\

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    • Question Asker
      2 months ago
      yeah that's pretty much how I'm feelin man, I just misjudged the hell out of things haha.
 
   
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At least 1, you'd shouldn't dedicate your life to the first person you meet

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