Well my girlfriend recently(2 days ago) said she wants a to have a break. I've been miserable ever since. I feel better now because at first she wanted to break up with me fully and now its just a break. I got her mind made up more by writing her a letter that took me 3 hours to do. Everything poured on it, all personal and loving details. Before I go into it more, my girlfriend and I were fighting a lot. Mostly silly things that build up. She told me she's unhappy and has been. We've said nasty things to each other but made up for them quickly. Just the very day before the night she brought it up, we were kissing, laughing and being absolutely normal with each other. I'm still deeply in love with her, I think she is too. She said there were warning signs. She said they were the crying in the fights. I told her she needs to actually talk to me, not use crying as a warning sign. It makes me think when she cries, its because she's upset about the fight topic(or having the fight in general), not wanting to take a break. But with the letter, I told her it will be best to take a break, see our friends and worry on school and do things we want and need to do. She is going to college this fall and is dorming for a year. She thinks it won't work, but all the time she said "we'll get through it, I know we will". Why the change of heart? I said it will make us healthier and stronger from not seeing each other as much because we will be more thankful for what we have. I hope others might agree? Oh yeah. I've bent over backwards for her and somehow I made her unhappy. I know materialistic things are nothing but I know it mean something to her, she got upset if she couldn't go somewhere with me(concerts, football and baseball games). I took her to everything and did everything. I changed my damn major for her(probably pretty damn stupid). Isolated my friends(getting them back now). Now she wants to almost break up. I'm so confused. So much to say but I can't with the limited amount to say. I did give her her things back and vice versa. But she wants a pillow of mine back. We still talk and say goodnight to each other. I hope things turn better for us. I need some opinions on what I wrote. For some odd reason, I don't think she wants this deep down. It's so confusing and its tearing me up inside. With what I said, do you think we can get back together? I'll give you more details if you can't answer it. Thanks.
Many relationships fail because people lose who they are to become another person for their relationship. This is by far the worst thing anyone can do, because in the end, you are dating yourself or they are dating themselves. Giving up who you are, doing things with your friends, changing majors, not stepping out into life alone without her - these are all classic signs of losing who you are. You need to stop that immediately (which you are) and assure her that you are still the person she fell in love with, and then it is completely up to her to let go of all insecurities and fall in love again, but you can help her along.
You're on a rough ride here, unless you really step it up and find out for sure exactly what she's afraid off, you may lose her completely. Something happened that has pushed her away, something that is driving fear into her. Talk, scream do something to let her talk to you. Whatever it is, don't stop getting back to who you are, and encourage her to do the same. Many relationships which are fulfilling today are based on trust and love, and in this case, she doesn't trust either you or herself. Without really knowing why that trust was broken, you'll never be able to make it work.
Hard to say. If she wants a break then give her the break. Talking to her isn't a break. She needs to find out what she wants and where she wants to be in life. Letting her go is the best for now. If she comes back to you then it was meant to be. It was nice that you sent her a letter but, you should limit contact with her so she realizes what she is taking a break from. Staying in contact with her is letting her know that you are still there and she won't miss you. Its hard and it sucks. It kinda sounds like you became emotionally dependent on each other and she just needs to see what else is out there. The crying fights are so unhealthy. Time will tell if you guys are meant to be. But my advice is to let her do the chasing for awhile. Turn the tables on her. Or you will lose her. She has to feel the loss.
Well I have seen this many times. I just went through it myself but I let my mind block out what I already knew. My bad I know. The way I look at it, if she says she needs time to think about things or needs her space, then the relationship is pretty much over. If you love someone then you shouldn't have to think about ending it or staying together. So when she says she needs a break then its any easy way for her to say its over and it won't be so hard on her because she is getting use to not being with you as much and getting to hang out with her friends or even meeting new ones. If she is getting ready to go to college then she will prob want to play the field and not be tied down. You shouldn't have changed your major for her either. You should have been looking out for yourself no matter what. There is no way of knowing when you did it that you might be is this spot. Sorry for being so blunt about this but I have been through it and I seen many guys go through it as well and the outcome was never the way you would like it to work out. I would just get yourself ready for the worst though.
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What is your favorite outfit for a night out with friends?
Light and elegant, But still high in style. With my bright red bag, it goes with everything and pops out a simple outfit. Ballet flats if we go dancing.
How do you style your hair and do your make-up?
Make up: depends on what time, night? Day? My hair has to be let loose and straight. As long as it isn't in my face.
(Age:18 to 24)
When: 6 months ago
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