How to get over a cheating boyfriend who lied to you for years but you love him?

Think about this person who matters most to you. YOU.

You trusted this person who did not deserve your trust. And you say you still love him? Are you his mother? Are you going to love this poor child unconditionally?

In a relationship the most important things are trust and respect. Can you trust him? Do you feel he respects your feelings? Does he deserve your "love"? You probably think it is all your fault. You probably think that there is something you can do or change that will solve the problem and he will be faithful.

It is not going to be that way. Forget the past. Learn from it and move on. DUMP HIM!

I really don't know this is gonna be really hard I know how yo feel and it's really terrible to think about how he waisted those years of your life. I'm in da same situation and its really p*ssing me off I think you should go out and have sum fun. I took a plane to Miami after I found out about my boyfriend and I'm pretty much havin da time of my lyfe rite now

These feelings are valid, just because someone hurts you doesn't mean you stop loving them.
however, think about it this way, do you want someone in your life who has lied to your face and has obviously cheated on you? don't you think you deserve better? well you do.

and a really big thing to think about is if someone really close to you--a friend, sister, mom, a daughter you'll have in the future--was in this situation, what would your advice to them be? would you be okay with them going back to someone who has obviously lied, and NEVER fessed up to anything until you called him out & broke up with him?

1. he obviously was not remorseful because he didn't admit to it & seek forgiveness
2. he was given plenty of opportunities to confess when you asked him about the rumors
3. he didn't take responsibility for his actions, and if he's sorry now it's only because he lost a girlfriend, not because of what he did

The feeling that you have now, this is rejection. No one likes finding out the truth, the rumors. But I want you to think, think for a moment. Did you ever doubt it? They say that if you think it, if the thought crosses your mind, then it is true. You wanted love so bad, that you sold yourself short. You said it yourself, that the relationship was good for the first few years. When it goes bad, RUN!
Time for tough love. He never married you, he married someone else. Let that lucky girl be the target and you run for cover! He sent you that text, that is COLD! He is an evil person and if you take his sorry something back, you get what you deserve, a loveless hopeless relationship.
YOU deserve what you have given to be given back. You need to get your trust back and try again. And do it till you get it right! If you are in love with love, then find love. No more serpents.
NEVER accept his calls. Move! Change your number! Whatever you have to do to get away from that poisonous reptile, DO IT! Do it for the love you have yet to find. Just think...you could have found someone better if you left him 4 and a half years ago! You could have been married to a man that never once forgot to love you and call you his wife.
Last. What if his wife comes looking for you? How awful. For her to find you, shows you she is pregnant and tell you that he will never leave her and you are just something for fun, or worse, she tries to harm you. THINK. Don't let this come true. MOVE ON! Protect yourself.
I wish you luck.

Take it one day at a time. It sounds so much like my story. Open your heart to loving someone who can appreciate you.

you realize as much as you think its not possible...that in like a few months you'll wonder why in gods name you loved him, and you will be thrilled at the possibility of a new guy who will give you butterflies and treat you well. a fresh start with someone you havnt even thought up yet but is out there right now.

i promise.

same thing happenned to me and I was crushed. I swear my heart literally hurt and I couldn't escape that horrid feeling.

its a little bit later and I swear he couldn't pay me to be with him again...i wish him the best, but I'm not even interested at all and have a new guy who is way cooler than I even knew I could get.

It takes a lot of time! It is really hard, but eventually, as the hours pass then the days, you find yourself thinking of him less and less. Stay strong. He will go away (in your head). And, when you least expect it, someone else will come into your life. It will happen.

There are ways to help you forget (that are constructive ways). Do good things for yourself, like work a little more (for extra money), volunteer, spend that extra money on massages or classes you can take, meet new people and make new friends.

Mostly, it just takes time.

Give it time but by all means do not go back, you will move on I swear. I was with my boyfriend for 4 1/2 years and we had a daughter together and I gave him the benefit of the doubt for 3 years that sh*t was going on and found out he was lying to me off and on the whole time... six months has gone by and I have found someone that I am so much happier with, and I am moving on with my life... give it time honey everything will fall into place and you will realize you are such a better person without him.

Wow aren't you p*ssed? That happened to me and well after I knew he cheated there was NO WAY I WOULD EVER GO BACK and I have kids with that mutha f***er. DOnt you think your worth more? Get p*ssed get real p*ssed cause this whole time the relationship you thought you had with him was a lie. Its gonna take time to get over him but do not go back.