Because I feel like he's the only one who really knows and understands me, can put up with me, and who likes me for me. Well.LIKED. And he's perfect for me, like my dream guy, which doesn't help matters.
I reckon its the fact that at the time you are still emotionally needy and have not yet learned to be enjoy your own company yet .
Often its the fact that you are out of your comfort zone when you are not around him . And so to feel safe and get back to the familiar to go back to him .
I would say stay strong and learn to enjoy your own company again . You are much better off for it .
I think it's more of a comfort issue when exes get back together. They are comfortable with each other. When you start a new relationship, it's hard getting used to one another and knowing each other's boundaries. When you have already dated someone, you know those boundaries. Of course for some people it has to do with not wanting to be alone or wanting to be loved, but I think with a lot, it is the comfort issue.
I am not afraid of being alone. I prefer comfort, security, and trust. Some one who knows me, my kids, my imperfections, etc. That's probably why I always end up in relationships with people I have been good friends with. Because I skip all the 'getting to know you' stages. If they are my friend already, then we already know so much about one another. And that may be another reason I would go back to them if given the chance. Friendship.
Even if they cheated on you? or treated you like garbage? - 5 months ago
Answerer
Now that is a different story. If that trust is gone, I could not go back. I wouldn't want to. I am talking about someone who I had a wonderful relationship with, but we may have taken a break to have some alone time. I am going through that right now and the guy treated me like a Queen, so he would be one that I would want to work things out with. We have been through many hard times together (another reason for the break), so we know each other better than we know ourselves. - 5 months ago
I think it's the memories that you share together, and the comfort that you had from being in a relationship with them . It's always hard to move on to something new, and getting back with an ex seems like such a comforting thought, it is also easier to get back with an ex, rather than the difficult task of moving on to pastures new . It also makes you think that all the problems you encountered that possibly led to the break up will go away and that you have another chance to make things right .
No, I kind of like it alone. I KNOW others can love me. She's not at all the only one in the world, or even the best person in the world for me.
But we have kids, and an obligation and commitment to try to make the family work. And if we can, it would be ideal. And the kids deserve our best efforts here.
Well this is a good reason to go back, but do you have a good relationship with her? - 5 months ago
Answerer
You have to have a path to a good relationship, but not a flawless relationship. If the kids are your only reason it's almost impossible to make it work. Because you're both so unhappy about it all. But you if you still do like AND love each other, then working out the issues more the sake of the family, the kids, to be true to your promises (even if you don't like her as much as you used to; even if you met someone new who MIGHT be better for you. ) is called dedication. It's good. - 5 months ago
Question Asker
So do you stay faithful? Or do you have an open marriage? - 5 months ago
Answerer
That's kind of a non sequiter imo but I do stay faithful and we don't have an open marriage. When we split up, it was about mistreating each other, not sexual fidelity. To fix it, it has been about learning how to treat each other better, listening, being non controlling and secure and appreciative, and such.
Is that what's bugging you? You haven't been (or don't want to be) faithful or monogamous with her? - 5 months ago
Question Asker
No I am a monogamous person. I'm not the one being drawn back to my ex. The girl I was dating was acting distant. She has been on/off with her ex a few times in her life all ready. She told me once in January that he tried to contact her again. I know she told me she would never go back but I believe she might be repeating a pattern. - 5 months ago
Answerer
Ah. Well, can you connect the "being distant" to the ex contacting her? If so, then somethings up with her. If not, then its a GOOD sign that she's honest enough to tell you she got contacted and that she would never go back. If you believe her, then believe her. And work on the "distance" separately, whatever is causing it. If you DON'T believe her, then THAT'S your problem. You don't trust her; she doesn't feel trusted. Maybe she's really not trustworthy. But yeah, fix the trust problem first. - 5 months ago
What appeal does an extremely skinny girl have for a guy? I'm not talking about in shape, I'm talking about girls who are unhealthy skinny. I thought...
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Describe your ideal first date; Where do you go? What do you wear? How does the date end?
No fancy dressing up...just black jeans and a white t-shirt for me...and what ever she wants to wear....we go somewhere fun and exciting...and if all goes well there will be another date.....i don't kiss on the first one...sorry...
Afterwards..what will your date know about you?
I'm very funny and very romantic and I can always joke about something...I'm caring and I am very very smart....some people say I'm prideful...but I'm not...i can help anyone with any problem at anytime at any place...just ask and ill tell you what you want to know....promise
