Should I break up with him for good?

He is the mother of his child correct? Can't trust a B*tchy female with a son. I feel you forgeting he has other obligations to her and you. If he's with you and shows it then show him you won't take him for granted and how much better off he is with you than her. The child is a perfect excuse. If I was you I would also use it to my advantage and ask your boyfriend if you him and the child can go to a fun place and enjoy the day together so you leave an impression on the child that the mother would watch her step.

example - go see a movie the child would like and go eat his fav food making him think your cool.

Dont blame his ex, it is he who is to be blamed for behaving this way with you. It is understandable that you feel angry with him for not giving you the importance that you deserve. Break up with him for good.

I think you should move on. You're too young to deal with this kind of craziness in your life. Whether the kid is biologically his or not, I do think if he's seen as "dad", he needs to be there for it. The fact that he hooked up with a nut job of a girl is his fault and he shouldn't be so quick to leave his responsibilities. If he does, he'll create another insecure girl with daddy issues who will be the focus of more topics on here about why girls love jerks.

Sounds like he's more trouble than he's worth. It's up to you if you want to continue anything with this man.

Hey babe, I'd like to help by asking you some questions:

1) Of the 6billion+ people on the Earth, how many have you had relationships with?
2) Do you feel you might be jealous because his attention is not entirely on you?
3) How would you feel if the child was his, and he broke up with you for her?
4) If you proved the child wasn't his, would it make him more attracted to you?
5) Have you asked yourself if he might be having an affair?
6) If he was having an affair, how would you react?
7) If you started seeing one of your past relations, how do you think it would make him feel?
8) If you answered "jealous" to question #7, do you think he already knows how you feel now?
9) Say you accept that he might be having an affair with his ex.. If you be the woman NOW, by telling him you're taking a break from the relationship, SAY "NO" to any arguments he might bring up after..even if he acts all sappy & phones you every day after..

now say you kept your options open for 2 weeks, and by the end of that time he did not say that he would give up his ex, would you proudly move on to the billions of other men, or would unhappily choose to be stuck in your past fighting a losing battle?

What does your female instinct suggest after your thoughts?
Your INTUITION about men is your strongest power when dealing with men, and you know that very well better than myself! Find a female friend, or internet buddy if you must that will support your intuition and your choices as you feel your way around his motives, and help you stay strong as you may feel unwilling to give him up if you must.

Wishing you the best!
Diamond Smith

This isn't a problem with his ex, it's a problem with you.

If you're insecure and jealous about his ex girlfriends, then everything you're doing is pushing him away.

If you're ever unsure if a relationship is over, ask yourself this... do you ever feel resentment from him, or towards him? If you answer yes, then it's over.

There's nothing that helps you forget an ex boyfriend like a new guy worth getting to know,
~ Robby

Impossible to say. So many variables.

Like how the guy was with this other woman with a child. Was he responsible for the child being here for instance? (even if it isn't biologically his).

I would say, push this guy back to his previous relationship (if they panned children together). Otherwise you splitting up something.

If he got truly lulled into a relationship with someone who already had kids (and he had not responsibility for) then just fight for your love.

Just don't mess around where kids are concerned. If he has been with his ex for a long time and the kids grown up with him, send him packing.

I would think if he loved you he would not let that get in the way. You should be the one winning if he actually cared not her

What should I do?"
IDK. The problem might be the kid.
If he's attached to the kid, it's normal he wants to see it, biological father or not. A man who raises a kid will often ends up considering it as his. (I at least would and I know others!) An arrangement with his ex about the kid would be best.

Oh hell every time I hear a guy has a kid to another woman I stayed away. Nothing personal to them, but that woman has a kid to them, and sometimes they will use the kid as a leash to get back the man, be it for money, sex, attention for the child. Always seems to cause some turmoil in the future. If only condoms didn't break.

Ok I think you should be mad I would want to meet his baby mama too if he makes it seem like something is going on. I love kids and my fiance has a possible baby. I have been to court with him for dna testing and child support court and I have met the baby mama. If he won't let you meet her something is going on and you have the right to stop it so you demand it one more time to meet her and if it doesn't happen you leave and he will be running back to prove you wrong if he realizes you are the one. And if they are not sleeping together.

theres probably nothing harder to do than watch a man you love be manipulated by someone. it makes them seem weak and makes you wonder if there are feelings keeping him under her control. I wouldn't say its feelings he has for her as much as it is his inability to stand up for himself. you have to decide if you're up to watching her control him which in turn controls you to a degree. it sounds like he really cares about you and maybe the child too, so maybe he's worth it but its going to be hard on you unless he can grow a backbone.

Okay, I read the first paragraph, then stopped reading. I have one sentence to say to you... "It's called a breakup because it's broken." Memorize it. It's a book, a brilliant one. Chances are, if you've broken up more than once, you should stay that way.

I'm sure you've got the standard "he gets me", "we have chemistry", "I love him", etc. etc... but the fact of the matter is that you keep breaking up. Meaning that one or both of you are doing something that is wrong, or you're just incompatible. Which, that's okay because there's MANY men out there that you'll have a wonderful relationship with.

Go find him! Best of luck.

If this guy has been sweet since you got back together and is willing to do what you need in order to feel happy and satisfied in the relationship he has GOT to let you meet the mother. I would suggest to him that you would like to meet the mother because you would LOVE for the little girl to spend the weekend with you and you want the MOTHER to see what kind of person you are so she would feel comfortable. Play the nice guy. You want to be kind to his kid. The Ex woman whatever she is will get so insanely jealous she will probably threaten to take the kid out of his life completely (had friends in similar situations by the way) if he brings her around you or goes somewhere with you for the weekend. Truth is, the kid isn't his, he feels bad abandoning the kid. I think most of it has to do with the kid probably because he has taken care of her for a while and feels attached. I doubt it is the ex, she knows you exist and if something is going on, then you know what to do. I would try playing the nice guy though (even though you want to freak out) because being hostile or insecure/jealous doesn't get anyone anywhere. You want to appear like the strong person here, so then he goes wow my girlfriend is so incredibly cool, look at my whining complaining ex. & hey she's an ex for a reason right? he caught her with another guy didn't he? if he runs back to that you're better off without him because he is a total dumb ass. It really sounds like he got suckered in by the kid, but doesn't want to be with her.

ps. I can pretty much bet that if you make up a fun weekend for this kid (your idea make sure she knows that) the mom won't let it happen and confirm your idea that she wants your man. Continue to plan outings, she will get so frustrated she will take the kid away and poof you solve both problems. No more ex...no more kid that isn't his. lol.

To be honest with you I truly thinks that he still have lots of feelings for his child mother. It is very strange to me that he does not want you to meet the mother of his child. (strange).It sounds to me that they are closer than what he is making this out to be. maybe he is still in love with her.( just my opinion) you just can not trust men or figure them out.

Womens intuition and gut feelings are usually dead-on. The fact that you wrote asking if he is hiding something tells you your intuition is kicking in. Are there other things he hides? The mother doesn't have a car. Well, who has been driving her around? Where does your boyfriend live? Does he call you everyday? Are you able to reach him anytime via telephone? I wonder if he's playing both sides or if he is just uncomfortable. I dated a man who had kids and I met the mother and really liked her a lot. We got along great. Even when the kids were at my place she knew she could call anytime to talk to them. And, I even told her she could stop by anytime. There was definitely no feelings between him and the mom. You should have that same comfort. You have a right to be angry and I'm surprised you are putting up with it. Tell this guy in a nice way how you feel and that you'll give him a time frame...like 2 weeks. You'd like to meet the mom in 2 weeks or you will end the relationship because it's not healthy for you feeling this way. He may not have even told the mom about you so this gives him a window of opportunity to make things right and tell the mom about you instead of you showing up like a surprise. Just a suggestion.

He obviously has an attachment to this little girl. I have to concur that based on what was written that the mother is using her as a means to keep him in her life. He probably has great guilt if he isn't "there" for the little girl. Unfortunately, he does not see or is in denial about this woman's blatant manipulation.
If he doesn't have feelings for the mother and he has nothing to hide, then you should meet her. It's a simple remedy for this problem. His failure to follow through sends out a huge red flag.
I think you need to acknowledge that as long as you are both together, this little girl will be in his life. Until he separates being a father versus manipulation then your struggles will continue. If you can help him identify this then you've won half the battle. If you can't then you'll have to decide if stay or go.
Good luck.