Been dating this guy for 9 months now and we have really clicked from the start. We have known each other for years but never dated till now. Anyway, he was the first to say I Love You and adored me which was mutual believe me. Then about a month ago he said he wasn't ready for a serious relationship. Totally and I mean totally crushed me because I had no clue this was coming. So without tears or drama a few days later I said fine if you don't want a serious relationship with me fine we will go our separate ways but you should never make all those promises to another person if you didn't intend to keep them.
So, a few days pass with no contact what so ever (we used to talk several times a day and see each other when we could) Then all the sudden he starts text/IMing me and calling and saying he misses me etc etc etc. but we have not seen each other just talking over the phone or the IM. This has been going on for a month now. I don't know what to do, Part me says to tell him not to call anymore and part of me want to give it a chance.
Hey there. I'm kinda in this guy's shoes right now. Me and my ex girlfriend broke up about 2 months ago. I broke off communication for about 2 weeks. I couldn't take that all we had just dissolved into nothing. I wanted to apologize and at least resume a civil friendship (We go to church together, and have a few mutual church friends). She was angry at first, but after a few good talks, we agreed to try and make things right with each other. Another week or so went by and I started to share my problems with her. she would always hug me and be concerned. I realized just how much I do love her now. I've tried to redeem myself to her. She went on vacation, and when she came back, things were a lot different. She has a lot of personal things going on and she told me that me wanting to be back together was adding to her being overwhelmed. That I just needed to give her room. I gave her that space because I don't want to lose her. If she'd take me back, I'd propose! She's not given any indication of still loving me, but she has re-assured me she still cares. but just dosn't know if we can ever have what we had. Just up and taking him back will not show you he's serious. Maybe a few outings as friends? The decision lies with you how much space to give. I know that my ex totally turned the tables on me. Now I'm dying to be with her and don't know if I'll ever have the chance again :(. Us guys get scared. I'm 24, and I realize that I may have blown my one chance to be happy. I wanted my "freedom" but now I see it wasn't worth it. He may have done the same thing? Hope this was some help
I think that when he told you that he doesn't want a serious relationship, what he mean is he hasn't love you to the point that he want to get serious with you. Did he change his mind about having a serious relationship after no contact with you for few days?
Yes he did change his mind after a few days but he is still contacting me daily but does not seem to answer any of my questions he says too much pressure? - 7 months ago
Answerer
He still have feeling for you but does not want to lose his freedom yet. Did you pressure him about marriage? Guys may feel intimidate about that. Don't take his sweet talks and promises too seriously, some guys like the feeling of having the power to control other women's emotion. Just take it easy, if he really likes you, things will get serious eventually. - 6 months ago
Question Asker
Thank you for your response, I just thought the natural progression would be for us to be exclusive after all we did look at houses together and he was talking in "future tense" with me about us. But, I think you are right I think he likes playing with women's emotions, he is still seeing his ex-wife and a girl at work and wanted me to hang in there for him and give him time. So I said no can do! Call me when you are done playing and maybe I will be available or maybe not. - 6 months ago
Well I think he is a bit confused and scared. he does not know what he wants and he might be scared of getting in to a serious relationship. it could be his last one was horrible.
if you date him make sure not to be so close to him, ignore him some times. because you have make him feel that he miss you. you know since it work once it might work again. give him a chance
(Age:18 to 24)
When: 2 months ago
asked Yesterday
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