So my boyfriend and I dated for almost 3 1/2 years. He had been acting kind of funny for a little while, so I got into his myspace account and saw he was talking to a co-worker about her cousin. I got upset, and confronted him (calmly just asked him about it) and he got mad and dumped me. It turns out she was really young and it was just a joke, but I took it wrong. Nothing else came of it. Anyways...it's been almost 2 months now and I want him back. We've been talking some and he said we could just be friends and see what happens, but I'm having a hard time with it. He never contacts me first, I'm always the one to make the moves. He acts really sweet when I see him, but if I call him he acts like he isn't interested. What should I do? It's hard to just be his friend when I want him as my bf.I asked him last night what it would take to get another chance and he said "time". I told him I was afraid he'd meet someone else in that time and he said "you have no faith". That was the whole convo on that. When I left I asked if he was going to call me next week and he said "sure". I just don't get him. Do you think he just wants space to figure stuff out, or do u think he's just keeping me around in case he can't find something better?I know this sounds pathetic but I really want to get back together. Should I just give up and stop contacting him and see what he does? Or what? Please someone give me some advice!!
Update: Well it was the 3rd time I had gotten into his account before, so he was pissed that I didn't trust him. I understand that, and I feel bad, but he also KNEW I had his password, he just forgot.
9 months ago
Also, a sure sign that he is not really into you, is that he doesn't answer your questions.
You: "I'm afraid you will get someone else." Him: "You have no faith."
That's not a, "I just need time to think," or a "I'm in love with you but need time," or anything. It's a, "Yes I probably will, but I don't want to say that so I will point out the obvious."
Also, him dumping you after so long over a question, and him being so aloof just means that he is not into you.
Stop investing your feelings into someone who doesn't care about yours and move on.
It is over sweetheart. He cannot trust you. More than likely he has no intention of getting back with you. You violated his trust three times. The first time yea I can forgive but three times. Take this friendly piece of advice if he somehow takes you back don't violate his trust again.
Secondly let him know that you know you were wrong for playing the snoop. Put yourself in his shoes how would you feel having to justify yourself three times?
First if he really loved he wouldn't have dumped you over a stupid thing. He probably is still in contact with this person. A lot of guys like to be in control, if they screw up they will turn it around on you (not all guys) but obviously he has done that to you. Take some time for yourself, heal. Why be with a guy who doesn't feel the same for you? If I were you I would let it go. (word of advice, if a relationship is strong each partner would do whatever to fix a problem. He dumping after 3 years, should tell you something.
Everything that you said about him...is exactly like my ex. (except for the breaking up part, that happened a little different!) I say give up!! When he sees you're not interested and putting as much effort into him anymore (although you are still interested) he will start to chase you. Guys really don't like to be pursued most of the time. It is more fun for them to do the chasing! So play hard to get when he does start to come around.
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