Getting over a break up?

what is it that makes you fearful or not wanting to enter a relationship?
i know fo rme, it was trust and that I was hurt badly emotionally as well as physically
so
if it helps to talk to friends, do that
and when you heal and find the right girl, it will be alright to date again
best of luck

They say time heals all wounds, but it's not necessarily true. I'm still not over my last boyfriend and it does tend to hinder relationships I've had since him. My advice is to go for the dates. A year is plenty of time to grieve. If she hasn't wanted to get back together, then it's time to go back on the market. Dating again will keep your mind off her. At least it did for me.

Keep your options open.

You have not really gotten over your ex or you may think that no other girl can and would compare to what you had. But you are the one that is putting yourself in your sistuation. The only way you are going to be happy and move on from your ex is by meeting other people, even if you can't say yes. You have to say yes even if you think it feels wrong.

Thats all the help I have

Go for someone very different from your ex. Have a casual relationship first and let it develop instead of getting deeply involved. Also, tell the girl that after your break up you are scared of getting too deeply involved too fast and if she is understanding that will be good.

Say yes. That's probably a good place to start. I was kind of in the same situation once. I ended up going out with a girl that I wasn't exactly crazy about just to take some pressure off and try and have a good dating experience. Maybe that wasn't the best solution, but it worked out ok for me. I knew she was going off to college so there was an understanding that we were more friends than anything. That made it easier to go out with her and just remember what dating is like.

You need to be the hunter I think. Someone asking you out just isn't enough for you. You need to look and the moments when your being asked out just isn't enough time to look, to grow some kind of feeling to stand up to whatever scar your break-up left. You need to sit somewhere and start eatching girls. Not to the point of being a weirdo or something. Just take notice of the girls nearby. Think about them. That one has a cute smile, she has a great a$$, and she's got a great sense of humor. What would it be like to go out with her, or her, or maybe even her. Don't worry your young, and your being told this by a nineteen year old. You'll move on. Remember that both you and the girls your age become capable of deepwer and more meaningful relationships as you get older. Try the shy cute girls. I've suddenly seen them in a new light. There's something about there seemingly frail personalities and cute nature that makes you want to hold them, to wrap your arms around them and to protect them from the rest of the world. You want to be able to pull those rare smiles and jokes from her. It makes you feel good that you can do for her what few others can. All of those feelings are very strong feelings and may be able to help you push out these other feelings. That's just my own personal preference though. You might prefer a different type of girl and a different kind of feeling.

Anonymous:

A year might sound like a long time in some relativities, but in the world of fantastic relationships its definition varries. That first year, for example, that you're dating someone is one of the best times you'll ever have with them. Conversely, that first year after losing that extreme emotional connection can be a trying time for obvious reasons, and some not so obvious. Your body and mind (not to mention, your soul) is still getting used to not having that person there to touch, to see, to open up to. Yes, we think of the lack of sex, but what we don't take into account is the amount of release a partner gives us. When you have a bad day, you share it with them. When you accomplish something, you share it with them. Your emotions become not only tied in, but dependent upon this other half of you. The loss of that takes more than a skydive and some Ben & Jerry's.

Now that we're through that part, on to your current situation. Reimmersing oneself back into "the game" isn't an easy phase, especially when coming off of a long-term relationship (divorcees can vouch for that). It takes time to get used to the swing of things again, patience for when things go wrong on those terrible first dates, and practice. Lots and LOTS of PRACTICE. The worst part of this stage is thinking that every failure you encounter is due to your situation, but you have to remember that there are a lot of crazy singles out there that are single for just that reason! Another notion is that the dates you get first in this period, the ones that make you wonder why it was so easy, are the CRAZIEST! There's a reason it's easy, my friend! Run away while you still can!

You just have to remember that the next few weeks are on your terms, and your terms alone. If you want to go out, go out! Bring some friends, make it a night! Don't go out looking for a replacement for your ex, because that will only keep her in the variables of the equation. Instead, throw the math out the window and enjoy yourself. The old saying is true: when you least expect it, it finds you!