Previously, I was engaged to another guy and we were planning our wedding . Obviously, we ended up not getting married and broke up .
I told my new boyfriend about this and he asked what our wedding was going to be like . He then asked, hypothetically speaking, what a wedding with him would be like (where we would have it, would it be big or small, would there be drinking and dancing, etc) .
At what point in a relationship should you start talking about things like getting engaged, getting married, or having kids ? I realize it's different for everyone, but is there a general time frame where it is good to talk about these things ?
About two months into it I think is a fair amount of time, just to ask him what he wants for his future. That way you'll know whether or not you are wasting your time.
No general time frame . Actually, the earlier, the better, as long as it's not one person whining, "When are we going to get maaarriiiiied ? " That kind of nagging pressure to get married can cause problems . However, it sounds like you're just casually discussing it with your boyfriend . There's no harm in that, and it will allow you both to learn about each other's preferences, styles, and future plans .
Its always a good idea to pop this question anytime in your relationship, it helps you understand that guy whether he plans to play the game till the end or he is just fooling around and acting decent just to get some where .
But seriousness defines the depth of asking the question and that you can get only when you truly understand each other .
I don't think I would have all the answers or questions about marriage that I would want to ask my girlfriend until we dated for a while, for a legit conversation about the topic . It would be longer than two months . And I'm overly cautious when it comes to things like that so it might take me longer than I even know myself . I would like to say if I was possitve that the relationship had a solid foundation of trust from the beginning, it would be sooner than later to realize to make me want to talk about it in a relationship . I would like to say time wise, I would like to at least say a year give or take some time .
And if I was asking the hypothetical question, I would asked it as "What would your planned-perfect wedding be like ? "
Well I think 2 months is to short to be talking about marriage and children . Since you really have to get to know that person . And you trust that person enough . Marriage is a big step and is not to temper with so I advice you to get to know that person before even thinking about marrying that person . But a guy once told in order to know if a guy really like you or want things to work out ask him about the marriage topic . And then you will know where hos heart lies . I wish you luck take care
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