Do you put them on a pedestal right away or should they earn the right?

If a guy started being extremely romantic to me, and we haven't known each other that long, I would think he is fake and just trying to charm his way into my pants. You should get to know someone. I hate when people throw the L word around. I've had guys say it to me prematurely and honestly, it's kind of a turn off.

I think that there is a difference between "putting her on a pedestal" and "being a gentleman/romantic. " Putting someone on a pedestal is pretty much thinking that they can do no wrong and therefore setting yourself up for failure before you even begin. I don't ever want to be put on a pedestal by any guy. Most secure decent women don't want that. Now, bringing flowers every once in a while is just being romantic. Once again a secure woman won't start thinking, "oh this guys a wimp. I'm definitely going to run all over him. " That's dumb. I love flowers and if a guy waits three months before giving me flowers on a date then it will just seem blah. Maybe that's just because my sign is cancer and we're hopeless romantics. LOL.

I try like hell not to put 'the new girl' up there because it makes it hurt that much more when it ends, but I can't help myself, I just do. I don't make it appear that way (I hope) but my mind plays tricks and fills in unknown details about her seemingly subconsciously that make her seem like a 'better' person than she is.

It's probably a good thing though. It's hard to do really romantic stuff if I don't feel totally infatuated with her to the point I don't care how foolish I might seem (ie: if it backfires). Obviously if on date one, she listed all the flaws that I'd notice on my own over the next few months w/o there being any sort of bond, it'd likely scare me away.

I tend to put women on a pedestal right away, because I think that's where they belong. I've been burned a couple of times doing this, because later I found out they didn't deserve to be up there.

You NEVER should put the woman on a pedestal.

Now. The idea of "shouldn't" verses what some of us guys do (even when we don't mean to) is a different issue. I find myself doing it from time to time, but I'm less interested and more skeptical and cautious of girls/women I meet at first. I used to do it all the time, which was devastating.

That being said, a real woman is deserving of love and consideration. Now that means that as the right kind of man, on occasion, and if you're in a relationship, you're going to put her first. If you're a person of faith, then she should switch between second and forth or fifth, usually at your higher positions. Sometimes you will be second, sometimes she will. If you have kids, those priorities will change, and the amount of importance and consideration changes at different times. And if she puts you above herself in consideration as you should, you've got the potential for a spectacular, genuine relationship.

Never. You can think the world of someone, but if you project yourself as not being worthy or as less of a being than them... no matter how much they love you, eventually they'll leave you, cheat on you, or generally just get sick of the routine.

Where's the never option?

Woman are not better then men and vise-versa; no one wants prince charming - except maybe Mom.

. Perhaps rephrasing the statement to say.

. "Do you put them on your love seat. "

. Makes more sense.

I always put her on a pedestal right away and generally get hurt haha. So its prob best to wait.