For the Guys...How would you respond if........

Beautiful woman? Is your ego that inflated?

I think you might have already damaged things.. When she first said I loved you and you know you didn't then that is where you should have been honest and told her she was going to fast and you were not ready. Now that you have told her I love you. If you tell her that you want to slow it down she will know you lied to her about the most important thing in a relationship and your trust is gone. If you do love her but are just not ready to settle down. then the problem isn't her it is you... either way I am sure there is blame on both parties... your actions have to had come across as being ready for that next step!

you aren't really giving a time frame which makes it hard to answer.
I would likely go on the trip unless I didn't like her at all.

if I stop calling or returning calls it means that for some reason, and there can be many many reasons, I am not interested anymore. there is no one thing that makes you stop calling.

first of all I wouldn't say I love you because we really like each other maybe if more time had passed we could be a girlfriend and boyfriend only if she was committed and if she paid for full for a trip to vegas I would not allow it I would say I am paying and invite her

i would stop calling or returning phone calls if we where never boyfriend and girlfriend because I would be extremely uncomfortable around her

How long have you been going out? Did he know you were that serious. Is he in college are you? MAybe he's not ready to settle down with a wife maybe he's worried you want kids right away and he wants to be a good father and wait till he's ready and he doesn't want to put aside his dreams to make a nest with somebody. Maybe he likes you but he's not sure he wants to spend the REST OF HIS LIFE with you. The paying for the trip. That's a form of power, it makes him obligated to you. Its hard to say no to somebody when their spending thousands of dollars on you, it can seem manipulative especially to a man in a society where men are supposed to take care of that. What if a male friend of yours you know always stares at you and has a crush on you offered to take you on an expensive dinner right now. Ud say noit will almost obligate me to fulfill his wishes which probably involve going back to his place...
you can't blame the boy for trying but it doesn't fit into your life does it every girl seen guys do this stuff to them. I'm afraid you might have scared him away. I bet he loves you but he doesn't want to get married because it doesn't fit into his life plans right now. There's a song like that "go away little girl before I beg you to stay" You need to SLOW DOWN just enjoy spending time together

C. If she's too fast and want to jump into marriage before a year. Then I'm going to have to stop it right then and there. If I like her and she likes me she should understand best. I'm delighted she'll pay but in all honesty its a bit creepy and seems desperate. Rome wasn't built in a day, love takes time and honesty.

I stop calling a girl, if I feel used, or she's just in it for the fun, if I catch her in a lie, or if she calls too much and leaves more then 10 txts messages if I haven't even returned one.

A. You really liked her

Someone that is always calling and never lets you have personal time. If you smother someone in a relationship it will never work.

The keyword is...he said, "I love you too".

Hence, if I were the guy...scenarios B and C won't exist ;)

As for the next question...I'd do all of those after I tell her na this isn't working out. Yeah...I just don't "vanish"; I find that rude and inconsiderate.

I personally may not be a good example, but I don't stop returning calls or pull that crap, and I don't tolerate it done to me. I was in short "relationships" where things never moved much, but then I found a relationship where things flowed so well and things moved very quickly. If you don't act clingy, he won't have a problem if he likes you. The point, however, of things flowing quickly is it has to be natural and just happen; you can't worry that maybe he doesn't want to be exclusive or what not.

I oversee a small sales operation and our goal is to get to the decision ASAP. We sell in a way that gets people to speed things up and say "yes" or "no". You can do the same thing here, knowing that the answer may well be it's too fast for him and he's not that interested. Guys think things go too fast because they're afraid of a commitment. He said "i love you" back without hesitation so you're off to a good start. As to being exclusive, you have to sit down and ask him. The difference between a guy who will go to Vegas with you in a using way and a guy who goes wanting to move your relationship forward is whether he is an insecure jerk or a solid, decent guy. We can't answer that for you.

Well at first I would be taken aback by the offer, usually I would be paying for the trip to vegas LOL.
That being said this: "you both hit it off" is MUCH MORE important than this: "beautiful Woman ".
really liked her- of course I would go, who wouldnt?
did not want to be exclusive- well I probably wouldn't say that and go anyway, I might want to later
moving way too fast- would make up an excuse not to go (just being honest)

What makes you stop calling? When the girl is being way too possesive that it seems like she can't trust me. Or when she makes me feel unimportant then wants me to drop everything for her.
thanks for this question :)

If was so beautiful, I'd go with her. But if she was not beautiful, I'd probably say you were moving too fast for me. Next question answer, physical touch gets me goin'.

If she is really beautiful -- easy answer -- go for it, get her in bed. You will regret if you stay at home playing with yourself. This does not mean you are making a long commitment. What are you afraid of? Or is she really not that "beautiful"?. Don't mislead her. And yes, you can love someone at the moment, but not forever. Avoid revealing to much of your hand to her until you see how she is like intimately. Then you can also make a better decision.

Beauty usually clouds a man's thinking. But needy is a reality check.

As for the trip, I would have a honest conversation about my feelings, expectations and short term and long term future goals, and then decide if the trip was still a good idea.

if she still wanted to take me, I would go and enjoy, and that answer applies to all three options.

Someone acting nuts would make me stop calling. Acting wild turns the switch on. Try the Red Rooster in Vegas for the wild fun.

Good Luck,
James

I would say C. Especially if she said I want to spend the rest of my life with me, I would be like whoa there, and then I would peace out you'd never hear from me again. The only way it would be ok if you said I want to spend the rest of my life with you is if you were already together for like at least a year in my book I would go with 2-3 years before I want to hear those words said to me.

I'll call it "C"

What makes me stop calling?
If she never answer back like ever.

Switch?
Body language.

My girl and I hit it off really fast and by the first week we were talking for 5+ hours on the phone and we've only been dating for about 2 months but the conversation of marriage and kids has come up. Believe me if you two are right for each other and the love is there then he will want to go.

A. I would go, hands down
B. I would not have told her "I love you" and would apologize and explain
C. Maybe go on the trip and talk about things on the car ride (or plane) down there.

A. Pony up the money to go with her, with or (preferably) without sex;

B. Don't go;

C. If I had courage, I'd tell her. If not, I'd just abandon her.

She's moving way too fast for me.

However, that wasn't the case with my wife. We fell in love at first sight and we couldn't go fast enough. Four-hour conversations on the phone the first or second night...

Ted

1. Did you plan this trip to vegas to entertain the idea of getting married? Or just as a good time?
I'm going to answer assuming you're just going on vacation.

A. Heck yeah lets go and have a good time! If you both like each other you'll have fun without any issues coming up.

B. I've never understood this 'lets hang out but not be exclusive thing'..I'm either dating or I'm not. I don't really see myself going to vegas with someone I'm not dating (unless we've been friends for a bit of course)

C. I would bring up the subject and maybe suggest something less involved. Maybe a crazy night out on the town?

Last question: It's always different but only times I've stopped talking to a girl is when I've tried numerous times to get out of a relationship but they're too nearsighted/clingy to let me go. I've definately seen guys do it when they feel threatened (moving too fast) or when they feel like the woman is starting to be controlling/jealous

Hope this helps

A. Sure, Vegas rules. But listen, let's talk for a minute about slowing it down.
B. Look, I love Vegas, and I have no doubt that being there with you would be unbelievable. But I just can't lead you on here and make you think that I'm falling as fast as you and that I'm looking for the same thing as you. Let's talk about all of this first and then decide if we want to spend the weekend in a state of constant legalized debauchery.
C. See answer B, but throw in a need to know if she was thinking about a drive thru wedding.

If a woman is moving that fast, it's scary. Nobody should know very quickly who they want to spend the rest of their life with. Because we haven't lived all our life. A year or ten later you'll be a different person and so will I. I'm not saying we aren't perfect so far, but cool your jets on the forward progress.

Too fast. one guy did that to me, didn't really appreciated much because I really liked him and almost felt (kinda the same way) but I felt like he was trying to play me. because really who does that?

god that's tricky. a female friend was in a similar situation-the guy said the "i love you" speech after three weeks?! He was impossibly clingy; wouldn't let her chat to friends on nights out and was just a pain to be around. He also said the "I love you" thing to a friend of a friend after two weeks so its clearly a pattern for him. I'd be worried that this girl is the same.

If I was in that situation, I probably would cop out instead of having a row. But long term it will end in tears. I had another friend who didn't love a guy but just said "i love you too" to please the guy and she ended up dumping him. Just go with your gut. You can't make yourself love someone. You either do or dont. Its not that complicated.

If you don't want to be serious with her, just put her out of her misery now! The typical guy thing is just not to call which sounds like what you've done. Girls definitely respect guys more when they're told they're dumped but... has she called you a lot? If a guy doesn't text me back within a day or two, I just know he's not interested. But let this die down. Don't send her a booty call text like "hey how are you" two weeks later. She'll only get her hopes up for more than you're prepared to give her and she'll end up more p*ssed off and clingy.

If you don't like her, just cut contact altogether. Harsh but in long run its way kinder as at least you're not stringing her along. I knew a guy who went out with this girl for 11 months because the sex was good but he was a terrible boyfriend. When he dumped her, she ended up getting with his best friend two weeks later. Not nice but bit of karma in action I would imagine. Be careful what you do to her and how you treat her. It will bounce back on you later on in life, possibly in a relationship with someone you actually like. You can say I'm superstitious but its true that what comes around goes around.

Why was she paying for your accomodation to Vegas? Come on man! At least pay your way!

That is moving way to fast, those types of relationship never last. I'm sure the guy would go, but by the end of it I'm sure things would fizzle out months down the road. That's a case of too much too soon.

All of this depends on a guy's maturity level and communication skills as far as how they actually respond. I think the most significant thing is if the girl is the one who booked the Vegas trip and he realized she did it without talking to him and it was actually a booked trip, not just something she was thinking about, a lot of guys would feel, even if they liked you, like this in itself is moving too fast.

I think a guy who really was in to you would be super-excited and would go for it, but as for B and C, well they would feel it as pressure and be uncomfortable. Oh, and it doesn't matter if the girl is beautiful or average or whatever, even beautiful women get turned down or have guys run when they think it is moving too fast.

The switch that causes a guy or a girl to stop calling is when they feel you like them more than they like you and they just don't know how to tell you it isn't working for them, so rather than face confrontation, they stop communication.