I'm in college, and there's a guy in one of my classes who appears to have an obsessive crush on me. In class he smiles at me incessantly, and whenever I run into him outside of class, he blushes and looks like he's been smacked in the face or something. I was trying to pretend not to notice, but it's impossible at this point, and it appears that he's not going to "get the message" and stop (this has been going on for a month). That means I have to say something to him.
I would feel pretty bad turning him down, because he obviously really likes me, and, from what I've heard, he's gotten turned down a lot, probably because he's short, dorky, and socially awkward. So I thought, "Maybe I could give him a chance." The problem is, he has a horrible mustache that I absolutely cannot stand. I really don't care that he's short or whatnot...it's the mustache that's the deal breaker.
I just don’t know how personally a guy would take a girl not liking his facial hair. Is asking him to shave it the equivalent of saying “I like you better without glasses” (just a random example) or is it like saying “I don’t like you face”?
So, guys, would you take it personally if a girl said she liked you but couldn't stand your facial hair, and would you shave for her? And if any girls have experience (or just an opinion) with this sort of thing, feel free to answer too.
Oh, and, for what it's worth, he’s got a weird vintage-y style (he wears a lot of plaid and hats and things), so the mustache is definitely “part of his style,” not just a random thing.
Update: *It should say, "I don't like your face," not "I don't like you face." Gah, typos.
18 days ago
lol I understand your dilemma. I have a horrible fear of mustaches, mostly because their itchy, scratchy and very unbecoming on certain people. It depends on the type of guy he is. If he's laid back and has no aversion to shaving then it might not bother him. If it just happens to be a really bad mustache you could not only be helping his self confidence but his social life which eventually he'll be thankful for. But don't knock it til you try it, who knows you might come to love a mustache or two. Though personally I doubt that.
Would it bother you if your crush asked you to lose 10 pounds first? You have no relationship with him yet, and he hasn't asked for your advice. If you aren't attracted, don't go out with him. But don't be mean. (And "advice" that isn't asked for is mean.)
See, I don't know if it's like saying "lose ten pounds," since facial hair comes off a lot easier than weight does. That's the problem (and that's why I'd like to hear what a guy thinks). But I get what you're saying, and I kind of feel that way too.
But is it meaner to keep ignoring him or to tell him what the problem is? I thought ignoring it would be no big deal, but he seems to really like me. At the end of every class period, he looks completely dejected, and I feel bad. - 18 days ago
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(Age:18 to 24)
When: 18 days ago
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