Ok so I always make this mistake when dating a girl because y'know every time they tell me their always "Honest" with me. But let's just forget that they lie to me when they tell me they don't want me to get them a gift for (insert holiday here). (I would never skimp out on a birthday). But What I don't get is why lie and tell me you don't want me to get you something, is it some sort of mind game? Would you like me to tell you every time I see you not to hug me, run your fingers through my hair, make your cute faces, be as affectionate as possible? I love mind games but would it matter if I told them I don't mind if they're completely honest with me on the subject of gifts? (I'm not a cheap bastard, I just think the time we spent snuggling in my hammock during the summer is a bit more valuable then those shoes I bought you) Well this is why I don't ask questions I rant.from now on I'm only answering.but what I guess it all comes down to is.Yes/No, and how much do I spend per-holiday?
Update: I wish they allowed you to select as many best answers as you want but I'm going to give it to a whole new set of rules. Sorry Smitty.
6 months ago
Yeah smitty is right, we are NEVER going to tell you to buy us a gift. It's not the same thing as saying not to hug you or something. Buying someone (anyone) a gift is supposed to be something you WANT to do. Not something you do because you think that you SHOULD. But of course we are going to want you to always want to buy us a gift, lol.
Now on a side note, I frequently ask my husband not to buy me a gift and actually mean it. But this is a totally different situation. He doesn't ask me "Hey should I get you something?" I tell him before he says anything at all, "Hey I don't want you to buy me anything this year for my birthday, ok?" (I usually have a reason and provide that reason also, which helps because then he knows I'm really serious.) That situation is TOTALLY different, lol. But of course 9 times outta 10 he still gets me something anyway and I don't complain, lol. But on the times he doesn't, I don't get upset with him at all. But then see I agree with you, I would rather spend time with my guy having fun over getting a gift. That's just me though.
As for price. that's a total judgment call. Depends on how long you've been together, how serious you are, how much she has spent on you in the past, and how much you are ABLE to spend, and remember that quality matters so much more than price. If it doesn't cost much but is something that is just SO perfect for her, she's not likely to care about the price because she's just going to be thrilled for such a great gift and even happier that her guy knows her so well. In fact that can often be even better than a pricey gift. I also agree with Avalace that you can go a little cheap on the gift if you plan an amazing day/night together to celebrate as well.
I'll be honest with you, not all girls are gonna agree with this. Some people are just materialistic.
Don't think this is a new thing. You will have to learn that a women wants you to not have to ask you to do things. Just by asking her if she wants a gift is not a good idea on your part. As far as holiday's, I believe that there should only be two holidays that you buy a gift for her. Christmas and V-Day. And besides her birthday if you date somebody long enough anniversaries. But if you are buying for other holidays then you are nuts. I would how ever keep track of how long you guys are dating, I wouldn't buy gifts but I would let her know that you are well aware of how long that you have been dating. ie month, two months, etc.
As far as the whole mind games thing, just wait until you get a women to be mad at you and they say "you know why I am mad." Then you spend the rest of the night trying to figure it out. That is always enjoyable.
How much money depends on how long you've been dating. For me, I spend 5 bucks and I make a card or go for a night out we can both enjoy. I think material gifts are shallow and don't create a stable relationship early on.