OK, so I meet a guy online, we email and I'm chat for 10 days or so, chats last 2hrs, deep, intimate, about life, goals, wants, needs, work, play, kids, everything. We begin talking on phone 2-3hrs/night. Lots of texting all day. Note, he's doing the calling and texting. I'm laying back, letting him take the lead, the chase. Have a great first date, romantic, fun, talk in the driveway till sun comes up, no sex. Three days later I get an invite to come over, all is great. Third encounter, sex, great. Going on 3-4 weeks now, with him calling daily, texting, etc. We had the talk about taking things slow, that yes it feels good, but we both wanted to keep things in check so to speak. One night, we hung up with plans for him to take me to lunch the next day. I wake up, check my email, and boom.the I'm scared, been in LTR the last 4 years, don't want that right now, don't like feeling this way, want to play and date around, no commitment, says he might still be hung up on ex, blah blah blah. And then the can we be friends and hang out here and there or should he just kiss his own ass and move on? Obviously, I told him to move on. What the f&^k? I appreciate his honesty, but it came out of left field, caught me off guard. I truly had developed feelings for this guy, and thought we had potential. We haven't spoke since, just couple of emails.
I let him know it's hard to go backwards, that I did care for him, and if we could be friends it would not be immediate, that I needed to clear my head so to speak. His response is he understands, for me to take time I need, and asks that I talk to him when I'm ready and he would see where he was at, at that time. Having trouble reading him.maybe because I did become attached, but is he really scared and not wanting to get hurt again, is he stuck in the past with ex, or is he just not that into me? Do I move on? Do I contact him in a few weeks and say hello? Don't sugarcoat it guys, just give it to me straight.
Hmm fact is there's not much you can do about this. This has been his decision and his doing. YOU can't undo it or change it. It wasn't something you did to cause it so don't tie yourself up in knots going down that road. (not worth it). Whatever the reason he had there is absolutely nothing you can do about it. I've been there and I know what you mean. Everything's going well and suddenly bam - he ends it. Just leave it. It could well be a case of he was sensing how into it you were getting and he was uncomfortable with it because he just wasn't taking it as seriously or into it as much. Or it could be he's scared and has issues. Either way - there's nothing you can do so don't waste your time. Don't contact him again. Leave it to him. You were right to say you cared about him etc. But gracefully walk away now. Least that way if he changes his mind in a few weeks he knows it's safe to contact you - but DON'T become a pest - do yourself a favour. You owe more to yourself than you do to him.
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