Hey, I'm seventeen and my boyfriend (of a year) is going to Scotland for a few weeks to take poetry classes and I need to know how to be confident of him whilst he's away.
He's smart and charming, incredibly sweet, and handsome as the day is long. He's a tall glass'a water and he looks about four years older than he is. I don't know what girl wouldn't want to catapult herself at him. He's assured me that he loves me and that he would never cheat on me but it still makes me nervous.
He's talked about how much fun he's going to have and party. And his asshole friend told him that I would never have to know about what (or who) he does in Scotland and that it isn't cheating if you cross the Mississippi. I just need to know how to not go crazy thinking about everything he could be doing!
Tell him to have a good time and use condoms if he needs to. While you can't stop from doing anything, you can show him confidence and self value by not being freaked out about the possibility. That way, if he does, it isn't because he was cheating but because you gave it to him. This counts in your favor.
But what if I don't want him to screw another girl? :( - 5 months ago
Answerer
If he wants to, he will. While we can have preferences, we can't actually make someone else behave. What we can do is give permission in such circumstances. I am free to sleep with whomever I like and I have remained happily married to the same woman for more than a decade. Why? Because there is absolutely nothing anyone else can give me that I don't already have, including sex with them.
Jealousy looks good on nobody so it's better to be proactive and work with it. - 5 months ago
Oh gosh, that is tough! I guess you are just going to have to trust him. The truth is, if he's going to cheat, he will cheat, whether he's "across the Mississippi" or not.
How about giving him a little trinket to remind him of you, something he'll use on his holiday? I once gave a boyfriend who was also going to Scotland (!) a travel diary. I wrote a little note in the first few pages, and then made little comments throughout, so he'd think of me.
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(Age:18 to 24)
When: 5 months ago
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