My Boyfriend and I have been dating now for 9 months. Back in March we moved in together and into the happening downtown area. (lots of bars lots of single people) Well we're moved into the new place 3 days, he goes out to the bar and suddenly "he needs to see what's out there". I told him go for it but never moved out. He'd go out here and there for a couple weeks then when I started going out he always wanted to plan for us to do things together. Up until May 16th things between us had always hovered towards our relationship eventually ending. May 16th we went on a road trip to visit some friends of mine. The trip was SO MUCH FUN. We didn't argue at all after driving a total of 24 hours round trip. We laughed, teased each other, talked for hours. When we got back it's like being with a totally different man. I find myself feeling more in love with him and he's been so much more attentive and affectionate. Like he was when we first met. THEN He sprung on me a day after getting back he wanted to buy a house. He insisted on me choosing the house I loved, has had me added to the deed.and has been making small references to us being married. Am I crazy or did this man suddenly get hit with the commitment flu?
Sounds like he caught the love bug - again. Obviously, the two of you had something together enough to want to move in with each other. A short time later, he gets the wandering eye. Then the road trip and back to square one for a full circle. With your first foray into the cohabitation thing, there isn't much of a real commitment (unless you had to give up a rent controlled place or something!). With a house and deed and all, the commitment level has increased considerably. Perhaps the first few "needs to see what's out there" things were some old flame flings he had to reconcile before making the decision to settle down with you. Or perhaps, he will lose his attentiveness and affectionate behavior again towards you once the "newness" of the house thing wears off. I vote for the previous, because it wouldn't make sense to possibly wind up giving away 1/2 of a house to someone you don't love. Were your friends you visited a happy, successful couple? Could be he saw that and wants to experience it too. If you are not sure about where the whole thing is headed and/or not sure if you want to/not go along with it, you had better sit down NOW and discuss in detail where you BOTH want to be before it is too late to stop the commitment train. Good Luck to you both.
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