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Guy asks me on date then doesn't contact me when it came to the day?

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Shannon18 (Age:18 to 24) When: 6 months ago

Category: Dating

I don't get it, we was getting along so well an he said I'm beautiful and that he wants to come see me. He said I can't do ths Friday but next Friday is that ok? I agreed and said yes. I told him I could see him next Friday. Before the day of the date he didn't talk to me much. But before then at the end of messages he put love james x and seemed really keen. When I asked him a few days before the date whether Friday was going ahead. He said 'yes absolutely'. So I was certain kind of that he would come. I had a feeling maybe he wouldn't as he didn't bother talk much beforehand and it was me that was checking it was going ahead. The day before I messaged him saying hey what time you coming tomorrow. I didn't get a reply. The next day came and the date was meant to be at lunchtime about 12 one o'clock ish because he is a waiter and works evenings. That was a good time for me. On the day I was worried that he wasn't coming. I had no text or message on the dating site. My heart sank as I realized he's not coming and what was worst was that he didn't even contact me with an explanation or excuse. Like he just forgot me. I messaged him a bunch of times on the dating site that day. I know he read the messages but he didn't even bother to inform me as to why he didn't turn up. I felt gutted and cried. The date was meant to have been yesterday and he didn't say a word. Yesterday on the site he was online and this was after all the messages were sent. It's like I've been totally blanked out for no reason. I know he wasn't working as he went offline at the time when he needed to go to work so there was no real excuse :( I feel like an idiot. I've tried everything to make effort and I fail. I thought as he is 26 and he said he's a gent he maybe a good guy but it turns out he's like a lot of guys selfish and uncaring towards my feelings. I've had a rubbish year one failed relationshiop, four failed dates and one no show. I'm very unlucky in love and I'm sensitive to when guys treat me like sh*t so it hurts more then it would hurt another. I did nothing wrong he bailed out and was too much of a coward to let me know. I feel like an idiot I'm a nice person, and I just wanted someone to love and maybe love me at some point. That's all I've ever wanted. Would rather have love then money. That's how much it means to me. I feel like there is a huge gap in my life and I guess it won't be filled as soon as I would of liked. Maybe I got to stop searching cus that's when the wrong men come along. I'm a decent girl I don't sleep around or cheat when I'm in a relationship. I treat people with respect and when I don't get it back I have to cut all ties with people. So now I've blocked the guy on the dating site and that's that. I just feel so fed up of being treated like that. Maybe I'm too nice to guys, guys do you know why guys do that? Thanks all :) x


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6 months ago

Basically he flaked. You're lucky if you made it to 20 without understanding what it's like to get flaked on or stood up.

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- Question Asker
  5 months ago
  Yh I'm over it now life goes on!
- Answerer
  6 months ago
  It's normal to feel like that after you get the cold shoulder. Speaking from experience haha. You'll pick up hopefully within a week. Just try not to focus on that too much. Distract yourself. Go to a party with your friends. You'll feel better for it.
- Question Asker
  6 months ago
  Arh that's not nice at all. It happens to guys too. I just don't get why guys play around and mess me about. He doesn't get anything from doing that so it's just stupid and mean. Yh maybe I'm put off guys now though. Don't think I can ever trust what another guy says :( feeling very sad.
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- Answerer
  6 months ago
  Yeah tell me about it. When women give me the wrong phone number or won't text back... if I really like her it's like I've been hit by a freight train. But you get back up and you keep on going. You sound pretty level headed for a 19y/o. The right guy will come no need to fuss.
- Question Asker
  6 months ago
  Why do guys just 'flake' without a valid reason. Seems stupid lol. He seemed insecure though. When he asked me out and I said yeah he was like ' really' its as if he believed that I wasn't going to meet him. He is clearly rubbish with women and he has been single a while so yeah. Oh really lol, I'm 19 I've never had this happen bit I've gotta say its the worst feeling!

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