There is girl I work with once a week(a few hours each time). The first time we saw each other, I was sitting at a table and a few minutes later, she came up to my table and sat down next to me saying she rather sit with my group instead of hers.
The following week, she pulled up a chair to sit next to me. I noticed she was talking with another girl that just started who happened to be her friend. I thought her friend was cute too (more to that). Her friend just finished her shift so she left. We ended up with a good convo.
The week after, the girl I was interested in wasn't there. I sat behind her friend (only chair available) and her friend started fidgeting a bit in her seat then turned around and asked me how long I've been working here and such. She was really friendly and talkative. So we were chatting and then I asked how come her friend (the girl I like) wasn't here. She answered my question, but then became less talkative and somewhat sad? She then left cause her shift was over.
The next week, the girl I liked was there. And all the flirtatious behavior continued this time with her arm brushing against mine and one of her feet always being pointed towards me. After work, she gave me a ride home and she seemed to laugh at everything I said. At the end, she was looking at me while curling her hair around her finger over and over. I had a feeling I should ask her out, but chickened out. I figure I'll do it next week.
The following week, was so weird. The girl, her friend, and myself were in a room together doing a small project. The girl seemed so distant, all that dynamic we had from before was gone. Her body language was completely different and disinterested. Her friend seemed more friendly and outgoing. We started talking about engagement rings (since the friend's sister just got engaged)and I figured this was my chance to find out if the girl I liked had a boyfriend. So I asked them jokingly, if they were both engaged or something. The friend said No, I'm single (while smiling). The girl said no, she's not engaged (didn't really show any emotion). The friend then joked to her friend and said "you're sooo gonna marry him". Then I thought, oh, she has a boyfriend. But the girl said, "we have to go on a date first". Then that got me all confused since that means she don't have a boyfriend? Maybe a crush?
The friend went home. There was still an awkward feeling. It wasn't playful like before. She mentioned having a headache, earlier, and now she mentioned it again. I tested her out again, by leaning into her and she didn't move away. She was slightly blushing, and her lips were dry(signs of arousal? ), but she just seemed so distant. She said she was really hungry, so I asked if she wanted to grab a bite to eat (I pretty much knew the answer beforehand), and she declined and said she'll just go to her friend's place and make some food (which they were talking about). Because of that rejection, it pretty much confirmed my suspicions
The poor friend, she probably thinks you are flirting with her too. I think the problem lies within the dynamic between you, your crush, and your friend. We girls are strange, and we always compete. The girl you have a crush on probably thought you rejected her the first time you drove her home since you didn't ask her out, and then confirmed it since you were chatting up the friend too while she was there. She probably thought 'he might be trying to get to my friend through me', or 'he's a player since he's flirting with both of us.' Why don't you just ask the friend out since she seems more into you then the first girl anyway? people act funny when it comes to love, and girls can be turned off by the silliest things.
I didn't really look at it that way. She drove me home btw :) Us 3 were in a room alone together, I figure it was "normal" to talk with her friend too. Her friend seemed friendly, but Tammy seemed out of it. Well, I'm starting to really like Tammy =( - 10 months ago
I really have to agree that I think the girl really likes you. Females are still pretty much raised to be chased and not to be the one doing the chasing. So for most of us, subtle behaviors like the ones she was doing are (in our minds) equivalent to a big bright flashing neon sign that says I LIKE YOU with sirens and whistles blaring. And we don't generally like to put ourselves out there like that and get rejected. Which in our minds, a guy not reacting to what we think are such obvious signs IS rejection. So not only does she probably feel like she misread you, she also feels embarrassed.
Then the joke her friend made about marrying someone she hasn't even had a date with. Well my suspicion is that she meant you. And if I am right, then she probably thought that was really obvious also. And again, nothing from you. The best move would have been to ask her "Who's this guy you're gonna marry? " Then you'd know for sure if it's really someone else because they probably would have told you. And if they danced around the issue then it's even more likely it was you and you could have asked other questions too like "why haven't you gone out on a date with this guy yet? " It might have led to a perfect opportunity to ask her out.
Hey, I didn't realize you guys thought that way. I didn't even think it was THAT obvious lol. I was kind of looking for hints. It definitely wasn't a rejection. It was me being chicken lol. I actually feel rejected that she turned me down, twice that day. - 10 months ago
Question Asker
I didn't comment on the "marrying" remark since I didn't want to seem needy or nosey. I was just more confused when I heard that. Its so weird now. It feels like she don't even want me to talk with her. Like I'm bothering her and she's just being polite. - 10 months ago
I warn you that I disagree. I do not think that by her not pulling away or pointing a toe (serious? ) that she likes you. I think because she sat with you time and time again it is a good sign. But I think Sammy likes you I really do. - 10 months ago
The reason why Tammy may be acting a little different is because she thinks that you probably don't like her. When you said she was giving off all the "signals" I. E. Twirling hair, laughing etc. And you didn't take the bait so now she's thinking "man, I must of read his signals all wrong. " Now she's feeling a little confused about you so she's not going to put out the signals like before. Trust me, the girl likes you! Girls don't just do all those things at once when we don't like a guy. Her friend is just being nice to you because she knows that Tammy likes you. You need to seriously get the guts and ask her out. It's so frustrating for girls when guys are not responding to them. Ease her frustration and ask her out. Just because she turned you down once doesn't mean that it was because she doesn't like you. You said that she mentioned she had a headache right? Then she probably didn't feel good. I'm dealing with a shy guy right now who has NOT made one move in a year. One minute I catch him staring at me and then the next he's completely ignoring me but his friends are staring at me. It's completely frustrating! ASK HER OUT! Best of luck! Let me know if you have any other questions.
Hey, thank you for your response. I just so confused. I just had a gut feeling she was interested that one week, but her attitude towards me changed so much the week after. That day, I asked her to lunch, twice. Once at work, and once when she drove. - 10 months ago
Question Asker
When she drove me back home that day. I asked if she's sure she didn't want to get something to eat, and that it'll be my treat for driving me all the time. And again, she declined and stated she would just go home and eat with her friend. I really don't - 10 months ago
Question Asker
I really don't want to make her feel uncomfortable. It just felt like she wasn't interested anymore and I should just take the hint. I got her AIM SN, and I IMed her the next day just to say hi. She never responded (she was AFK) and this was like a week ago - 10 months ago
Question Asker
Since I IMed her, she has my SN now. I figure if she was interested, she would respond back to me, but she have not. I'm a pretty shy guy myself, and the only reason I even asked her to lunch was because of the week prior. Do the guy a favor; help him =) - 10 months ago
Answerer
My advice was too long so I just sent you a message. - 10 months ago
Ok, first off you should have given them fake names because it got way confusing to read that.
Lets say the first girl is Tammy and Tammy came up to sit with you one week and then the next week she showed up with her friend Sammy. Now Tammy is the girl who has a huge crush on you and wants to go out with you -- hence why Sammy said that the two of you were going to get married.
Now Sammy is just being nice to you because she's Tammy's friend and getting a feel for you so she can report back to Tammy. She isn't interested in you at all. Your evidence for it is very lacking. Just because her toe pointed at you means nothing and not moving when your arms brush? Well how weird would it be if she just jerked her body away from your's all rude like? And the car ride? Again she did that for her friend Tammy. Not because she likes you.
The question is. Do you like Tammy at all? If you do then just ask her out because she obviously wants you to. Her friend Sammy is growing distant because she thinks you might like her instead and she doesn't want you to get the wrong idea because she's just a wing man for Tammy and not interested. She wants to avoid an awkward situation and your making that even harder.
Hey, you're right. I should have given them names. I think you got mixed up. Tammy WAS the girl that sat with me. But its also Tammy that pointed her toes at me and not moving as our arms brushed. Tammy was the one that gave me the car ride also. I like Tammy - 10 months ago
Question Asker
Yes, I like Tammy. But I technically DID ask her out to lunch but she declined. It wasn't Sammy that was growing distant, it was Tammy. That is why I don't get it. Why did Tammy seem SOOO interested one week, and then the next, nothing. We did she decline - 10 months ago
Answerer
Yeah. I'm still confused as to who who is each time. So. Sammy is the one who looked sad when you asked about her friend? My guess is that one of the friends liked you and the other was just trying to make it easy for her to talk to you. Maybe you - 10 months ago
Question Asker
Hey, yes, Sammy was the one that looked "sad" when I asked about Tammy.She answered my question and kind of hurried the conversation and said she'll see me later.Maybe I am TOTALLY wrong and none of them likes me and they were just friendly?Im so confused - 10 months ago
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