Ex. ; A girl likes you, she doesn't actually say it. But she gives you some signs. Is it really that possible that you will not pick up on them?
Some of the signals I give off and my friends to let a guy know we like him. We; *laugh at his jokes (but only if it's truly funny) *Twirl our hair between the fingers or play with it in some other way, like tossing it back, putting it behind the ears. *touch our lips from time to time (more so if we really want to kiss you) *stroke a part of our body. Naturally imagining that it's your hand touching us (and hoping you'll get the picture) *look deeply into your eyes and when you look up at us we keep the gaze and give you a smile *seem to always be in a good mood when you're around *joke a lot (well. This one depends on the person I guess) *feel comfortable around you (or the opposite. Quite nervous) *touch you more than other people *try to make you jealous by flirting with another guy in front of you *sit next to you or directly across from where you're sitting
Guys think differently. To be honest, most girls miss a lot of "guy signals" as well. So I guess are are just not very atoned to understanding each other? I've gotten similar signals such as the ones you mention above from girls, and it literally took weeks of signaling to get my attention.
I think that guys are kind of very simple and think systematically, while girls tend to think in a more complicated way and we have to make everything so complicated (and, trust me, we don't like it either!)...so we can't seem to relate to the way you think since we are used to this web we create for ourselves that just makes it all even more difficult than it really has to be! I KNOW! xD - 8 months ago
Answerer
You make a very good point there. Guys tend to take a more logical approach to things, while girls are slightly more emotional (generalizing here). I feel that open communication is probably the best way to go. Language is a wonderful thing, and you can usually twist words around to signal that you like someone. Or you can just be honest and say it. Most people enjoy being noticed. (and that's guys and girls) - 8 months ago
Because they can ALL easily be confused for other things.
1. laugh at his jokes - maybe he thinks he's just genuinely being funny
2. twirl your hair - you have a thing for playing with your hair, ok
3. touch your lips - do you have something on your lips you're trying to get rid of?
4. stroke a body part - umm, maybe it's sore?
5. look deeply into my eyes and smile - you trying to screw with me somehow?
6. seem to always be in a good mood - you're an annoyingly cheery person
7. joke a lot - ok, you're funny
8. feel comfortable around me - you're my friend - or you're nervous - is there something wrong with me?
9. touch me more than other people - probably wouldn't notice
10. try to make me jealous by flirting with another guy in front of me - id think you liked him and were trying to hook up with him
11. sit next to me or across from me - ok, you're looking to talk to me, that's cool
these signals can all be misinterpreted easily because they can mean a number of different things. if a girl can't come right out and say it to me I'll probably never pick up on it and just move on. and if I like a girl, I'll come right out and say it. its not a matter of etiquette or rules, its a matter of common human decency to be honest with each other.
One thing you need to understand is that we guys are totally different creatures than you girls. Girls miss our signals as well, as much as guys miss your signals. Guys aren't psychics, we don't know what you mean by when you give us signals. Yes we can be clueless, but once again girls can be clueless as well when it comes to signals.
One thing to watch out for especially with guys, is the "try to make you jealous by flirting with another guy in front of you" we are not going to like that you are trying to get another guy to like you by flirting with him. Not only you are trying to attract the wrong guy but you are also making the other guy seem that he isn't wanted by you. If a girl did that to me I would really feel that "oh she doesn't want me, time to move on and give up"
Its better to be upfront with the person you like, when it comes to getting a guy/girl to like you showing it doesn't always help, but telling would make it so much better. Tell him/her you like them, it might be an awkward way to tell/show someone you like them but at least you're honest about it, besides if that guy/girl can't realize that you had the guts to tell them you liked them than that would take some courage and confidence to tell them that, then they're not worth your trouble.
1) These signals sound good and all in writing but when you are actually seeing them happen its not obvious.ESPECIALLY if your overall body language is not supportive of this. For example: You are twirling your hair and all but then you are sitting with your legs crossed.
Well that is not very clear at all. And its not that you are crossing your legs purposely but because you are used to doing it while sitting and do it unconsciously. You have to really look at your overall image rather than specific examples. You would be surprised how mixed up signals can get with small things.
2) The main reason I don't completely agree with your post is because GIRLS ARE F"ED UP! Not saying guys are not but I don't like it when girls act as if they are some freakin angels from heaven. Girls will do all of the above things just for the attention and not to actually imply anything. As you noted above, these are signs that show you like us but guess what most of you do this all the time to get more attention. But you dont' want that kind of attention. Just someone to look at you, appreciate you (for wutever reason), to feed your ego. AND GUESS WHAT.guys have figured this out. So even if we see these things, we hesitate quite a bit before we approach you about it.
So its not that we don't notice.its that we don't want to act on it just to find out your are just another attention seeking girl, who needs approval from guys to feel better about herself.
P.S. please list out more of the signals for people to see so that they can watch out for them. It doesn't hurt to know them.
Yup! I completely agree with you! Some girls even do this unintentionally. All I'm saying is, if you already know the girl you like, and you know she doesn't act like that with other guys, just with you...THEN why can't you figure it out?
P.S. Guys are even worse than girls. The would do anything to get noticed, even get their asses kicked! xD - 5 months ago
Answerer
But how will he know how you behave when not with him? Unless you two have friends in common. But if you don't behave like this with other guys in front of him...then it is definitely more clear ("try to make him jealous by flirting with other guys"?!?!)
I totally agree that guys are way worse but note: we don't do it for approval or confirmation but for FUN (not any better!)
"even get their asses kicked! xD" - It seems someone might be doing the things above to "unintentionally" lead a guy on - 5 months ago
Well you have to remember we are JUST guys, we aren't THAT complicated. Some guys can pick up on most of the ones you mentioned, but others won't. If you really want to get a guy to notice that you like him straight out flirt with him (touching your lips is barely noticeable and is hard to pick up on unless they are looking for it). Another thing to remember is that when a guy reaches his teenage years his ability to read facial and body signals degrades (this is a proven scientific fact that has been tested and retested). So subtle signs can often be missed. However some goods ones you mentioned are touch him more than other people, look deeply into their eyes hold their gaze and smile, twirl and play with your hair, and always sit by them.
Pretty easy when most of them mimic every day actions a girl does. Although I guess saying I like you is just too hard. Some get it some don't. Some didn't get the pamphlet. Or I guess where absent that day in class. It is very likely. Been there before.
To be honest I would only (and this is a maybe) pick up on about 2 of the ones you listed. So yes, most the time we miss them all because they're so darn indirect.
Women drop hints and show interest through body language and subtext. Guys are usually pretty obtuse when it comes to that stuff. If you're interested in a guy the only surefire method of getting his attention is to come right out and say so.
All of the signals I will notice and understand except flirting with another guy and trying to make me jealous. If I see a girl who is interested in me then she flirts with another guy, then I will walk away and ignore her and pretty much forget about her.
I don't find girls who flirt with multiple guys attractive. The impression I get is that she is either an attention whore or she just wants some dick. If it is a girl's intention to make me jealous then I will think she is immature and that also makes me want to ignore her.
I also agree with soxfan94. If I see you flirting with another guy I would still not be interested, because I could think that's naturally how you act with every guy (such as being an attention whore or she just wanting some dick).
Yup! We kinda want to see if you'll get jealous...if not than we see no point in continuing to like you...so we just move on. It may sound silly...but, that's just how a lot of girls operate. And I got this kind of a comment before (somewhere below), so I get you don't get our behavior...but if it helps...we don't get you either...(especially the shy ones!!!) - 8 months ago
Answerer
"to see if you'll get jealous" And if we do, you'll yell at us for being needy and insecure ;-) - 8 months ago
Question Asker
No.! Ad least I wouldn't! I would then know you have feelings for me that are more than friendship and I would make a move. ;) Or let you make a move. Haha - 8 months ago
How could you call us clueless, when you know you aren't communicating directly? :)
I agree with the statements below, if I saw you flirting with someone else I wouldn't think you liked me at all. Even more so if you were friendly around me before, I would think you only thought of me as a friend.
I guess missed signals are a lot better than mixed signals. I get those more often. And they can be horrible!
So what kind of signals would you want a girl to give to you? So you would be sure not to miss them...?
Yup...I agree...you're not clueless...it just seemed like a simple headline for the topic... xD - 8 months ago
Answerer
Talking to me is the best thing. I really hate the "positioning effect" where a woman will walk within inches of me, and wait for me to discover her. Drives me nuts that I'm cute enough to be interested in, but not good enough to be talked to.
A good signal that I may actually take initiative on. A full blown smile. Genuine interest expressed with a smile. It's a little contradictory since I don't like the previously mentioned signal, but that's romance for ya! LOL - 8 months ago
Because some girls are just flirty and that's what I see it as just them being flirty especially when they flirt with other guys yes it mite make him jealous but it shows me that your just a flirt and not just interested in me
Guys just operate on a completely different wavelength than girls. Just as youre saying we miss your signs, you probably miss ours as well. My personal feeling is that if you like someone, be up front about it. It may be awkward at first, but if nothing else the person will have respect for you for having the balls to say how you really feel. not only that, it also removes all doubt. Many people, through fear of rejection or whatever it may be, will not make a move unless they are 100% confident in the fact that you like them. Even the slightest bit of doubt will turn them away from taking the next step. Flirting and games can be fun, however, but they get tiring very quickly as I'm sure you know.
