8 months ago I started tutoring this guy for some college exams, and since then we've stayed friends. He has never denied the fact that he has a girlfriend, I had a boyfriend too when I first met him, but we never talk about our romantic relationships during the time we spend together. He keeps doing the nicest things for me like cooking what he knows are my favorite dishes, suggesting we always go to my favorite places, helping me do things for my family, and a lot of other things I would not know how to put into words. I've tried to convince myself otherwise, but I think I've really fallen for this guy and the same has happened to him, though he hasn't realized it yet. Is it possible? Do women realize these things sooner than men? What should I do?
Based on what you've written, it seems that both of you realize the same thing. It's just that both of you are in a committed relationship and the both of you know that it's wrong. For anyone of you to make the first move could prove disastrous. On top of that you are his tutor so both of you should not be talking about anything more than college exams. I think he knows exactly what you know.
I'm in a similar situation, but in my case- the girl told me that I would need to move out of my current relationship first. She knows how I that I like her a lot because I told her. Nothing has happened between us, we remain friends. I'm just in a dilemma of what I need to do.
I probably shouldn't do this, but the more I think about it the only solution I see is telling him how I feel. I know It won't be fair since he's already into a relationship which, honestly, I don't know the nature of, whether is a serious thing or not. We are going out for dinner on Wednesday, I'm really scared but I think that'll be my chance to let it all out. What do you think? - 4 months ago
I ran into a girl that I know from my past about a month or so ago and after we got to talking to each other she was wondering why I never asked her out. I told her that talking with a person and doing things with them is never what it seems. She was a cool girl to hang out with a long time ago. I never had feelings for her because I never saw myself as being intimate with her. Then she asked, "well what about now, do you see us as ever being a couple. " So I replied with, "Hold the horses we just ran into each other a few minutes ago and we just finished catching up with what we've been up to lately. Thinking of asking you out hasn't even crossed my mind yet. " I haven't spoken with her since we last saw each other and if I do come across her again, all I'll be saying is "I'm taken" whether I really am or not.
But you never saw yourself as being intimate with her cause she wasn't physically your type or cute enough to even consider it? - 4 months ago
Answerer
Don't get me wrong, this girl was hot but we were just friends. I can truly say that I never saw myself being with her. Maybe it was because I didn't want to break that close friendship bond that we had. It's a risk to ask any friend out on a real date. The thing that you have to ask yourself is if it is worth losing a friend if things were to go wrong between the two of you. - 4 months ago
Question Asker
I see. That's happened to me too, so I guess I can say that's not the type of relationship I've had with this guy. We're friends but never been that close really. We've also gone out more than a couple of times, he's asked me, I've asked him. So, I guess I'll hint to him that I just don't wanna be a cool girl to hang out with and see where it takes us from there. Thanks for the help :) - 4 months ago
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