I have fallen deeply for a girl I met a little more than a month ago, we have a lot in common and through the month I've known her she's been going through a lot of tough and tribulation times. I have been there to help her best I can, and its been taking a toll on me. We recently hooked up, but I didn't want to push the boundaries, just soft kissing and cuddling, but the next day she was avoiding me when I tried to do it again. I just want to know if she likes me and she is flirty but not slutty type, I really can't read this girl, I feel like I was used just for one night to cuddle with, but in reality I really want her to like me back. I'm not sure how to act anymore I just don't want to be hurt.
Theres a possibility that she's still hurting inside. I wouldn't try to put moves on her by trying to kiss her or touch her again but instead just talk. The moment she realizes that you'll be there for her, then she'll feel comfortable in trusting you...thats probably why she's acting weird because she probably feels awkward with what happened.
If you guys cuddled and kissed then there is a big possibility that she does likes you! (unless, she did all that from drunkenness) I suggest that you give her some space, do not call her nor text her. Let her contact you when she is ready. You will need lots of will power! If she doesn't contact you within 1 week,(I have a feeling she will) then honey, you have to move on. . Remember, women don't like needy men so take control of the situation and good luck!
It's possible that she's having second thoughts about changing the relationship. She may not have feelings for you beyond friendship and is now certain of this after the night of kissing.
She may also feel as though you took advantage of her vulnerability.
Talk to her and tell her that you don't wish to pressure her into anything she's not willing to do and tell her how you honestly feel about her.
Know whether or not you can continue being just friends with her if that's her decision. If you're not able to be friends, then it's best to let her go. If you can and her decision is to remain only friends, then respect it and work toward building the trust again.
I wouldn't try hard to get her to like you. You should return to being friends. It will just make it really awkward if you continue to try to date her or get her to like you. If you show that your still their for her then she'll stop avoiding you. You should still be a very close friend to her. Eventually she'll see that you mean more to her than a friend but don't push. You won't only loose the girl you like but you'll loose a very close friend.
I understand what she's going through, I've been in similar situation when I kissed my friend, but I didn't like him in that way, but I felt he liked me. He was always there for me and he was so selfless but still it didn't make me like him more than a friend. What I could say might work for her to see you more than a friend is if you don't show that you're always available to lean on, but just let her know that you like her and be cool, don't try to kiss her, unless she makes a move first.
Ok here's your problem you said you didn't want to push the boundaries as in have sex well did she want to have sex and you said no? Sometimes girls do that if they want to have sex and you don't they get turned off, its happened to me before and yes it pisses you off cause your like well I like her but I don't want to just have sex with her, makes sense right. Well now she's avoiding you, she's either playing hard to get or she's not interested anymore, so what if I were you don't talk to her for a few days, see if she calls you, and if you get the opportunity to hang out again tell her strait up be like look don't play games with me, I want to know where this is going, and I don't want to waist your time or mine, if this isn't going anywhere. Now don't say right off the bat you want her as your gf, but say I want to take you out on dates more and get to know you better do you want to? Don't say things like I care about you and I really like you, if you do this man you can smother a spark so fast, just keep your cool with her and wait for her to say that she likes you, don't reveal your feelings before she does or until after you have actually slept with her. If you reveal your feelings too fast she might run and or worse say well I don't know what I want right now but we should just be friends.
When a girl leans on you for emotional support, two things can happen. One, you take advantage of her in her weakened and emotional state and she uses you to bounce back. Or two, you help her through the tough times and fall into the "friend zone. " It's a lot easier just to move on but if you want to still be with her and risk getting hurt then you should back off a bit. Don't chase her. Make yourself rare to make plans with. Plan events with other friends to make it so you are a busy person. Don't contact her, always let her make the moves to you. Send her subtle flirting signals and yank her chain but try not to come off too strong. Try meeting and dating other girls to spark that jealousy. And if you are lucky, you might spark that attraction you want and slide away from being just friends.
Ok that night you (hooked) up was probably her vulnerable and upset and she needed somebody to lean on but is she didn't like you it wouldn't of happened so just give it time you should start to think about opening up to her to don't let her always drain her feeling on you tell her how you feel and if you can't tell her yourself write a note or have a friends ask her
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