So basically, I never ever IM anybody first unless they might be expecting to hear from me or if I have something really important to tell them. I don't know why, I just never start small-talk or chatting with people because I guess I feel like if they wanted to talk to me, they would IM me first.
And this definitely is the same for the guys I like. I can never IM them because I'm always afraid they don't want to talk to me. So instead I just sit there looking at my buddy list wishing he'd say hey.
The guy I like (we've been friends for years) IMs me occasionally and starts off conversations, and once they get going, they are always great. But I never IM him first, and I feel like it's becoming more and more rare for him to IM me.
I guess my question is though, do guys do this? Are you ever nervous about IMing a girl first? Is it possible that my guy friend/crush is wishing I would make the first move and say something? Or does he just not care about talking to me all that much?
hell yes we get nervous. I do the same thing that you do. but just man up and say hey. my conversations don't always turn out great though. they sometimes just die, but still its better than just sitting there looking at the person's name. but girls really do make it a big thing about guys iming them first. but if you wanna talk, just say hey. seriously it should turn out better, I mean guys are the same too.
Everyone gets nervous -even guys! If you never IM him first then he will be thinking and waiting for you to talk, just like you do to him. I think even though your nervous, just once in a while say "hey" if you don't he could think your not interested! If he does say "hey" your problems solved, as if he's saying hey to you first then I really doubt he wouldn't answer you. hope this helps.
Well I definitely know how you feel lol. I get so self-conscious talking to people first because I think "They would talk to me first if they really wanted to talk", so I was that same way about IMing a guy I really really liked. He pretty much always had to IM me first, even though I absolutely loved our conversations and he never bothered me at all. The few times I messaged him first I would immediately say something like "I'll leave you alone if I'm bothering" and he told me not to because it made him happy that I was actually talking to him first :] He told me a few times that he had been waiting for me to talk to him first because he felt like he bothered me, since he was always the one starting conversations. So I think you should really try making the first move, he could be waiting for that! It would reassure him that you really do want to talk to him if he's worried about that :]
um I do AIM all the time I am doing it as we speak and there are alotta guys I like that don't IM me first! but one of them seems to like it wen I wanna talk to them 1st like wen I said I will stop iming you if you want me 2 he sed NO don't I like you don't stop talking to me. guys like it wen girls do that! I think it puts less pressure on them to be all manly! lol but I am just saying go for it!
he calls me, he acts like an boyfriend, i give him money and he don't change his acts around his friends he always speak no matter who is around.
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