A few months ago, I asked my crush if he'd like to grab coffee with me after class. He said, "I have class back to back today, but yes, I'd love to get coffee with you." The next day however, I was too shy to bring it up. >_o Weeks passed before I, again, managed to ask him if he'd like to go with me.
Again, he said yes, but he had classes back to back that day as well. So, I gave him my phone number (in a very cute and memorable way, if I do say so myself, haha), and then we we exchanged big smiles. Four hours later that day, he texted me something sweet, but friendly.
Unfortunately, coffee never came to be, due to bad timing (finals week). :/ The next time I saw him after receiving his text, I became, again, completely flustered by his presence and intimidated by his friends with him to bring up coffee, even though I really should have, since he was teasing/flirting with me during the moment. Sigh.
That was the last time I saw him before school ended. :/ His birthday, however, was last month, and I decided to send him a friendly text happy birthday, and posted something with similar wishes on his facebook wall. He hasn't replied to either. He has, however, on his facebook, replied to everyone else who wished him a happy birthday, except for me.
I'm just so confused as to what to think and do at the moment. Is it game over? Is he "letting me down gently" by not replying, or am I reading too much into it?
Or, should I shake it off, or try texting him or writing on his FB wall again? And if I were to text him or write on his FB, what could I even say?
Thanks in advance for the advice, by the way. I appreciate it.
First off, none of that texting or facebook bs. I hate that crap. Most of the men I know only text because women like it. One of my buddies is constantly sending me texts. I straight up asked him if had ovaries.
It's always difficult to give advice on a specific situation. There's so much nuance involved in interpersonal interaction. I'm sure there's tens if not hundreds of details which simply won't fit in the 3000 or so characters allowed here. As such, I'll advise you in two contradictory ways.
The first advice is assuming this member of the opposite sex is somewhat like myself. I'm inept. I've had women come up to me in bars (decent looking women at that) and somehow manage to miss the fact that they're hitting on me. If this is the case, the one thing you need to know is that male idiocy eventually corrects itself, albeit somewhat slowly. So the best tac to take would be to make yourself available. It he's interested and realizes what's going on, he'll take care of it, assuming you're approachable.
The second advice is assuming he's not a complete bumbling idiot like myself (and, I should hope, a good percentage of all men). In that case he's letting you down gently. One of the biggest hassles involved in being a male is having to take the bull by the horns, so to speak, regarding interaction with the opposite sex. If a woman I'm interested in comes up to me and asks to have coffee, and I realize what the hell is going on, I'll snap up the opportunity in quite the expeditious manner. A woman approaching you and straight out asking to hang out is like finding 20 bucks in your pocket. All the benefits without any of the hassle.
Either way, I wouldn't push the situation. He's already got your number, so there's not a whole lot more you can do anyway. I certainly hope it all works out.
Ask him in a text if he would want to hang out somewhere this coming weekend.
Like say
"Hey this is and I was wondering if you would like to go to since we haven't hung out since the end of school. Give me a text, call, or message on face book back. Thanks!"
See how it goes.
He seems like he could be interested, but you just didn't get the chance to keep him interested. All hope is not lost. Just keep trying to hang out and maybe you guys can hook up.
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